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Give and get support around quitting

jennioptimist
Member

Tomorrow is my Quit Day 8/6/17... I need Support :)

Hi Everyone... Tomorrow, August 6 is my quit date... I say that in sort of an Eeyore voice because I hate to admit the amount of times I have tried and failed. I know that mental attitude is a big part of the quit, but I feel angry, embarrassed and somewhat hopeless that I can do it... YET, I want it so badly. Every night I lay my head down I tell myself TODAY is that last day, yet the cycle continues. 

I start a new job in 3 weeks. One I wont be able to do physically if I keep on smoking. Of course I know the other reasons I want to quit, its's just the stupid awful addiction that creeps in and keeps me hostage. I don't want to be a slave to anything anymore, especially something as downright dirty as smoking.

I need help though. Friends to stay accountable too, especially for the first WEEK. That's usually where I am failing.. It seems like when I quit, the anxiety sets in and derails me... I hope you'll take me in  

I have been reading these posts for so long and am so inspired by how nice everyone is, and how understanding ❤️

Tomorrow it is on!

11 Replies

So here is what I would do:

Write down all of your Fears, Doubts, Anger, Anxiety, Hopelessness, Negativity! The whole ugly mess! Take your last Sickerette(s) and wrap them up in a bundle. Find a safe place like a fireplace or BBQ and burn them together or just put them in a jar and fill it with water and put a lid on. While you watch them self-destruct together let your New Quititude be born!

From that point on every time you feel any anxious feelings coming - stop - tell yourself, "I see I'm feeling some anxiety" and then Take a deep breath and exhale very sloooowly - release the emotion like letting go of a helium filled balloon! Watch it float away in your mind! At my job we say, "Bye, Felecia!" [I didn't know either...look it up!] On the next inhale you're only allowing yourself to breathe in a fresh new beginning! 

Smoking Cessation is a Mental Exercise! Yes, you are physically addicted and depending on your method of quitting (NRTs, pharmaceuticals, smart turkey, etc...) Nicotine could be gone in just 3 loooong days (but still limited to @72 hours.) What makes people cave more often than not is their lack of engaging their Brain!

Nicotine literally hijacks the neuroreceptors of the Brain and thus, the way out also means using your Brain! It's imperative that you acquire an Attitude of Gratitude which I call Quititude! 

Quititude means you don't look back at past anything! You don't let feelings of deprivation set in! You embrace the becoming of a New Smoke FREE YOU! Imagine, Fake-it-till-you-make-it, Become!

As my Friend Marilyn says, it is absolutely doable! Not easy, but doable and totally worth it!

YoungAtHeart
Member

Welcome to our community!

You might spend a bit of time thinking about what thought process/circumstance/emotion led you to make the decision to smoke in your past attempts, and make a PLAN ahead of time what you will do differently this time.  If you kept any cigarettes around, get rid of them this time.  Soak them under water and put them in the trash.  Keeping them is giving yourself permission to fail.  You might try a different time of day to start your quit.  There is no rule that says you need to start first thing in the morning; 11:00 is fine, too.

You may not have time to read all that I will recommend today, but they make GREAT crave busters early in your quit.

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. Here is a link to a free PDF version of it:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmokingonline.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises suggested in My Quit Plan http://www.becomeanex.org/my-quit-plan.php

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort.  I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game. The one that can be used any time, anywhere is slow/deep breaths.  A crave only lasts about 3 minutes, so surely you can use those breaths to get through it.   Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

elvan
Member

PLEASE do the reading, it will give you something to do today to keep busy and it is going to also keep you busy after you quit.  Go to JonesCarpeDiem‌'s page /blogs/jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007-blog/2011/06/26/what-to-expect-in-the-first-four-months  I am also going to include a link to JACKIE1-25-15‌'s advice for newbies.  I strongly suggest that you come to the site regularly, every day, if possible, I came every morning and every evening.  Being around people who have quit and who have faced down very difficult situations helps all of us.  We are here, remember that and WELCOME TO EX.  

The link to Jackie's blog follows.

Ellen

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/newbie-quitters/blog/2017/07/20/are-you-new-here 

jennioptimist
Member

Thank you SO SO very much for taking the time to reply to me and encourage me... I have been reading the things you have all suggested this morning and it's been very helpful... It feels good to have support of a community that understands this horrible addiction... I am excited for tomorrow, dreaming of a different life for myself. However I am not blind to the challenges that I am going to face. That part makes me nervous. I want this to be the last time I have to go through this... I guess I am sick of myself too (so awful cigs can make you doubt yourself in everyway) YoungAtHeart Thomas3.20.2010elvan

elvan
Member

You CAN do this and we CAN and WILL help you!  Start looking forward to your new life.

Ellen

SkyGirl
Member

Hi, Jenni!  One of the keys to successful quitting is to actually DO the things that successful Quitters advise you to do.  Since you've been reading the blogs here for awhile, you know of that advice.  The comment up above have also given great advice. 

The way that all these recommendations will help you quit is if you take it all to heart, and actually DO the things that we are telling you will help you to rid your life of nicotine.  Every single person here on EX that has been successful, and stayed around to help the newer EXers make it, has been through what you are about to do.  And you can be successful, too.  

So please do all the recommended reading, do the tracking and other exercises on the homepage and keep blogging about your journey.  If you are struggling, come tell us that so we can support you.  And we WILL!

Promise yourself that, if you ever feel like you are about to give up and smoke, that before you DO, you will come directly here to EX and post a blog that is titled "HELP!"  When we see a blog with that title, we will rush to your side and work with you to get back on track.  We promise that someone will be here to help you.

Now, be HAPPY about quitting!  This is the most wonderful thing you can do for yourself right now.  You will NEVER regret freeing yourself from nicotine.  You are starting on a journey that is not always easy, but it is so incredibly worth doing.

xxxooo,   
Sky

maryfreecig
Member

Welcome. The weirdness/anxiety of quitting does not last--though it may seem so, that stuff just doesn't last. Support is a great way to walk though it. So keep coming back and checking in as often as you wish to. Keep learning,  keep participating, keep listening. Congratulations on your decision to quit nicotine/cigarettes. 

Sootie
Member

Tonight when you lay down---tel yourself one more time that this is it....and tomorrow, simply do not smoke no matter what. Just for tomorrow. And then, that night lay down and tell yourself you can do it again the next day. And then the next and the next. That's how it is done. 

You want to quit and I promise you that you can....I PROMISE! We all did and we are no different from you. The difference is the readings that have been suggested and the support of everyone here. Stay close to the site for the next few months......read, blog, vent. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!

Stay Strong.

bonniebee
Member

Welcome to Ex I can relate to your feelings about quitting i had tried many times, although years apart ,to quit and so many nights as I lay in bed hearing my wheezing lungs trying to clear them and thinking i have got to quit ! Tomorrow I will quit  and then getting up and lighting that darn sickerette !

Then I found Ex and my freedom from slavery to the nicodemon ended for good ! 

Every sayings quit smoking 3.jpgtime you have an anxious thought about quitting or a fearful one change the thought to an exciting powerful and positive thought get excited when you wake up and begin a new Journey !