NML Weekly Check In – 10/4/2017

[Roller831]

We have this discussion every Wednesday to offer encouragement and camaraderie to those in NML, basically months 2-3-4 of a quit. Regardless of how long you’ve been quit, anyone who likes the conversation and wants to offer support is welcome to participate!

We are happy if you just stop by to say hi and let us know you are still with us in NML.  Feel free to offer up ideas on topic question and I will include them in next week’s post!  Stop by daily or as often as you like!  Don’t forget to post to the Daily Pledge! 

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This week’s topic: Paying it Forward

One of the many changes you will go through in NML is the shift from asking for help to giving help. You will find yourself commenting on the blog of someone newer than you, giving them hope and advice, cheering them on. This is an exciting shift, but also a strange one – you may feel you’re not qualified to help someone else, maybe because you still feel so “new” yourself.

Quitting smoking is a journey, not an event. Although we each take a slightly different path, everyone who succeeds ends up in the same place – happily smoke-free. But quitting isn’t easy, and virtually no one’s quit is problem-free. So hang in there. Before you know it, you’ll be giving advice instead of asking for it, and helping that next generation of new quitters as they start their journey.  That’s how this site works, how we pay it forward.

Let’s hear from everyone in NML, those who have graduated, and our Elders – have you experienced this yet? Have you helped a newer quitter? How did it feel? For our Elders, do you remember when this change happened for you?

(Taken from an old NML Blog Weekly post by SarahP)

Click here to read Dale’s helpful blog about No Man’s Land:https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2011/05/24/no-mans-land-days-30-to130-appr...  

Click here to read what to expect in the first four months: /blogs/jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007-blog/2011/06/26/what-to-expect-in-the-first-four-months 

Checking in here will help you get through NML and on your way to the first year where you can celebrate being in the 6% Club and graduate to eventually become an Elder!

Please let me know if you are interested in posting the NML Weekly Check In.  I am happy to continue it, share it, or pass it to the nEXt EXer in NML who is ready.

NML List  (Please let me know if there is anyone who has been missed!)

roller831‌

julesakaGG‌

Christophina‌

Brianairb2‌

constanceclum‌

josnyder72‌

Free2BU‌

bookee6‌

turtlegirl101‌

TurboRose‌

tlajbenn‌

Dani_2017 

Ready2021‌

Diannnnn‌

gregp136 – GRADUATED!!!

TW517 – GRADUATED!!!

[elvan]

roller831‌ I remember reaching a year and being told that I was an "elder"...I said, oh dear, maybe a BABY Elder...I wasn't sure I was "qualified" to give advice at that point.  I think the point is that we are ALL qualified to explain what we are going through at any given time and to share that with others...SOMEONE will relate to it, SOMEONE will grab onto something.  It's how we work so well together.  NML is a very interesting place and it is so good to have the extra support when you are there!  I didn't want to leave because I was afraid all of that extra support would fall away.  Silly person, it NEVER falls away...as long as you are on this journey.

Ellen

[Showiestodin]

Thank you for the warm welcome, I am grateful and very happy to have made it this far.

[Roller831]

I saw posts from Christophina‌ and Showiestodin‌ elsewhere on the site but where are all of our other NMLers?  Please let us know you are doing ok!

[TW517]

I have always liked to try to help out when I think appropriate.  I have to admit though, I have held back and self edited many times as well.  I remember one of the Elders saying one time that a lot of newbies think their quit is way harder than anyone who has ever quit before them.  That would be me .  Now I will ashamedly admit that men (OK, me) are whiners.  But I do think my quit seemed to be worse than most of what I was reading on here.  So there were times when I was tempted to reply to someone complaining of a withdrawal symptom, "OH WOW! I CAN SO RELATE!  ISN'T THIS LIKE THE WORST THING EVER?!!  AND YOU KNOW, IT LASTED WEEKS ON END FOR ME!!!"  But, I thought that might be a little discouraging, so I held myself in check.  

Men really do have it much harder you know.  Remind me to explain the dreaded Man Cold to you sometime.  It's far worse than the mere "Common Cold" that only women get.

[Roller831]

I bet a Smoker's Cold is even worse than the Man Cold

[Showiestodin]

Hello my family EX'ers, and more specifically my NML followers, good afternoon. I am just checking in to say hi and to let you know I have finally made it to NML again. This is my final quit I will make it this time. I am going to see it through to the other side and until death do us part.  

I have been having smoke-mares and just can't concentrate or maintain focus on anything, irritating and frustrating, Ugh. 

But I am determined to have a happy and healthy day today living smoke free.

[Showiestodin]

Topic question answer: I help others just by being myself, by showing kindness to others. Specifically, yes I think I helped at least one person here, at least she said I helped her. I was reading and commenting on blogs and there was one lady that was having a hard time with anxiety and panic attacks. I wrote her about what i did to over come my anxiety and panic attacks. I haven't had either in 3+ years now. When she wrote back to say how much I helped her, well it made me feel hopeful for her. Most of all it gave her hope and tangible steps she could take a hold of and do herself. I wound up posting a blog about anxiety and panic attacks. It really makes me feel great to help others. It is that brotherly love showed to others in just being yourself that comes out, it's great!!!   

[Christophina]

Hello everyone

I don't seem to be able to find my way out of No Mans Land, so I'm hunkered down between a rock and a hard place. 

I thought I had a map.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

What day are you on?

[Christophina]

140 days.