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Give and get support around quitting

gov62
Member

60 full days in and I'm the most angry person on the planet

I quit! April 23rd in my periodontist's office before 2 major LANAP surgeries. Eat or smoke - my choices approaching 50 years old. 

 I choose food. My quit sucks. I miss coffee and alcohol. I have no social life and I'm walking around pissed off all day - every day.

I go back to my dr end of August to check my healing and how to move forward with implants. If by some chance he can't fix me I'm going to smoke again.

Can anyone please advise how to feel normal for an hour???? I hate myself.

29 Replies
Roller831
Member

60 days is something to be very proud of even if you aren't liking one bit of it!  I can feel the anger in your post.  Jackie is right with the fake it til you make it.  Some say be it til you see it!  

Here's the thing.  Even if your doctor can't fix it, smoking will make it worse.  At some point, you won't have a choice to eat because of the smoking.

Today, you have a choice.  Today, you can try to make the choice to enjoy your freedom for one minute or one hour.  Can you honestly say there is not 1 thing that is good about you or the fact you aren't smoking?  I bet you can find one thing.  

If you can't, come back to this post, @mention me and then I will give you a list....I don't need to know you personally to tell you 1 good thing about you or the fact you don't smoke.  Hang on that 1 thing until you find another.  Then another.  I bet your list will grow.  Read the list.  Believe in the list.  Smile.  Yes...smile.  It's contagious.  

Make a choice to try to be calm instead of angry.  Make a choice to like 1 thing.

Roller

(and feel free to tell me to go to hell...won't be the first time someone told me that! )

Rollingon
Member

I feel you my friend. You have a life to be proud of. You are beautiful, and strong. you have overcome stages that have made others crumble. I to have quit before and felt the anger and people were all out to get me and they somehow knew I quit smoking and trying to make me smoke again.  Truth be told How would they know what I have or have not done. They can not make me do anything I don't want to. You can smoke again if YOU and only YOU want to. Can I ask you why you want to. Are you sure it is not  the addiction talking. Can I ask you something you know already after 60 of freedom,  Why do you want to? What will you positively get into your life for that one Cigarette?  I am on Day one and I would really like to know. I have all the moves now and it may seem as I am just a smarty pants today. But believe you me I am not. I am you. Life is hard and nothing good comes easy. I know you have people in your life that love you and know you are someone special. Never forget one day at a time and we are hear for you.

gov62
Member

The one thing keeping me from smoking is another day 1, week 1 and month 1. 

The actual physical cravings are sooooo much better. 

This is my head. I was PROUD of myself up till a few weeks ago and this profound anger overcame me.

Keep going day 1 - good chance you won't be a pissed off ex.

Roller831
Member

OK. If you were taking nicotine lozenges and stopped, you are absolutely feeling the effects of withdrawal.  Give yourself time.  It takes 3 days to get most of the nicotine out of your system, but it can stay in your system up to 3 weeks. 

Here's MY list for you!  I said 1 thing.

List for not smoking:

1.  Your breath smells better as do your clothes.

2.  Your health IS better now that you don't smoke - the physical is better (you said so yourself)

3.  You didn't die from quitting.

List for why you don't need to hate yourself:

1.  You are reaching out to people asking for help.  That takes courage which is an EXcellent quality to have and not something to hate.

2.  You have 61 days or quit behind you and are stacking those days!  That is certainly not something to hate either!

3.  Being mad and angry at the world is better than smoking....again not something to hate about yourself. 

I agree on cutting yourself a break.  You will be learning to deal with stress, emotions, and life without cigarettes.  It takes getting used to.  What helped me was making new memories without smokes!  Instead of I used to have a smoke when....it became I get to do this without needing or wanting a smoke.  It takes a lot of practice and I can say it is still hard....but well worth it!

We are here as you can see.  Keep reaching out.  Something may resonate with you.  Take what you like and leave the rest.

Roller

gov62
Member

Thank you for the lists......

And pointing out the lozenge...

Start looking for the day you aren't angry.

Start looking for the day you realize you didn't think of smoking all day.

Expect more days after that.

(For many it happens a little before or after day 80.)  

gov62
Member

Wow everyone the support has been great. 

I was "forced to quit". I could pay for band aid surgery that wouldn't take or last while smoking. Or I can move forward and fix a hereditary problem - that can be fixed if i put the cigarettes down. 

I am fortunate enough to work and pay for health insurance and since feb (2 perio procedures) to present, I have been seeing an acupuncturist. Did it help with my quit? I think so. It helped with pain, detox symptoms, and cravings I still feel. BUT, and I can't pretend to understand why, my body is revolting according to the practitioner.  I also had to use lozenge and I finally stopped this week.  So maybe this is why I'm so off.

Thank you everyone

I once again woke up pissed off and want a cigarette!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I did a 10 mile walk yesterday and I practiced 4 hours of yoga in group classes this week.

I supposedly look better than I have in years but I want to smoke.

SaraPeach
Member

Yes, it is because of the lozenges. 

MarilynH
Member

Deep breaths and know that we're all here to help you in any way we can, I remember being mad at the world and thought about relapsing many times but I wanted to live a better quality of living so I kept moving forward and stacking up my precious days of Freedom and my quit kept getting better and better life is without the crutch of cigarettes, you can and will be successful one precious Smokefree Day at a time or hour minute or even a second at a time but you must believe it and stick with N.O.P.E and vigilance because S.I.N.A.O Smoking Is Not An Option your health is worth so much more than going back to the slavery of the nicotine poison and congratulations on your precious 60 precious days WON hang on tight and don't let go of the best gift that you'll will ever give ourselves which is the gift of LIFE ....