I've tried quitting before. Cold turkey with no assistance was unbearable. Tapering off, then using medicine worked for about a week, but then I went psycho. I'm literally scared. My life is full of stress (most is which is self inflicted, I'm sure). I want to stop though. It is ridiculously expensive, first of all. The amount of money that could be saved each month is more than my car payment- that money could go to much better use! Health- I know it's bad for me. I went to school for medical classes in the beginning, we've all had the middle school talks about why it's bad and what it does. I've lost 2 family members to smoking-related illnesses. My dad has smoked for 40-some years and he's in pretty bad shape, so ultimately I will lose him to it too. But I have a deeply rooted psychological fixation with it, and I know it. It's more than just the nicotine, it's more than just the act. I've only smoked for 11 years, but then again- I've smoked for 11 years! I'm just scared. I know my family will be supportive, but I worry about being deeply depressed, gaining even more weight, etc. When going through withdrawl, I find it easier to resist the urges if I am alone. I avoid people. Everyone. Then I get upset with myself for pushing people away, picking at anything and everything they do and finding petty reasons to be annoyed, knowing that I'm merely doing it and being pissy just because I haven't had a cigarette. I'll make it. I have to. It's not the end of the world, it's the beginning of a new, healthier life. I need a drastic change in my life, and this is a good first step!
