HELP

[owlfeather]

Please help.  I just got a call .  My best friend, so close we call each other sisters, her youngest son, who I call my adopted nephew, he just commited suicide.  I don't feel yet, but the tears are coming fast and hard, and the thoughts of going and getting cigs is strong, so strong.  I don't want to.  I don't want to feel this either. What ever shall she do?  How will she get thru this?  Ohno, oh no,  no, no, no!!!!!!  Cigs will not bring him back, they will not.  But I want one so badly.  I just do not want to feel this....

[barbara42]

stay strong my friend, i am so dog gone sorry, i just do not know what to say except ask the only one that can help, i will get on my knees this min. for all of you, please do not smoke, it will not change a darn thing and will only make you feel worse

[YoungAtHeart]

Cigarettes will do NOTHING for your grief.  They are not your friend, they will not hold your hand, they will not lessen your grief!  PLEASE get yourself to a quiet place and do some deep breathing, slowly inhale, then exhale, then think about what you can do to help your friend.  I am SURE that smoking witll not help her, either!

I am sending my loving thoughts your way, and wrapping you in my comforting arms.

[owlfeather]

I know, i know.  I will probably be gone for a while after today.  I must go stay with her.  I fear for her life too.  She lost her husband 2 years ago, and her first and only Grandchild last winter.  I don't know where to put this shock and grief.  

[brenda61]

Oh Owlfeather Stay strong please.  Praying for you Honey.  Keep blogging to everyone

[owlfeather]

k

[brenda61]

[CommunityAdmin]

I'm so sorry to hear this. My heart goes out to you. Please stay strong, and remember smoking will not change any of this for the better. ((hugs))

[pir8fan]

Stay close to us! I know that you do not want to feel this! But you must! Cigarettes, or not, you must still feel this! Stay strong, and be the warrior you would have us all be, if the tables were turned! We are here for you, but you must be there for yourself!

You already know this! And you can do this! I believe in you!

[JonesCarpeDiem]

so sorry friend. take your computer if you can or make sure you can call someone.

there are no words for such a shock but we can pray.

you have numbers if yoou need t call people

[owlfeather]

I'm here.  Just can't type so weel reight now.  I 'm here...

[jeri9]

Owl...i know this is a ruff place to be. Please, Please look to your creator right now for your strength and the strength to help your friend. I pray for your guidance right now, I pray and thank God at this very moment for your needs, in all areas of your life. I pray that his spirit just take hold in a mighty way, and comfort you and your friend. I also pray that you not loose your focuse in this most difficult time.......you've come to far........I pray these things all in the name of Jesus! Amen..............God Bless You Owl....Stay strong and know that you will be in my daily thoughts and prayers.....

[SarahP]

oh no I don't even know what to say, how can a mother deal with this it's unimaginable. go be with your friend, she needs you and you do NOT need cigarettes. They will do nothing but add to your troubles. You have much more important things to do right now than smoke. You are in our thoughts and prayers, please stay close. 

[owlfeather]

Thank you everyone.  Tommy you are so right.  Dale I kept your number, and have a couple more, I am going into a numb feeling now.  Got in the car, turned it on, turned it off, I can't do it. Thank you Jeri, I feel the prayers and love coming in. Thank you barbara, Brenda, ex, Joni, Youngatheart.  I am going to sit here for as long as I need to, numb is better than smoking right?  

[Legend]

I am so sad to hear this please stay strong you can do this. Stay close to this site and for sure call someone here is you need to talk. A walk out in nature can be calming and a way to get your focus back. I will keep you in my prayers.  (((((Giving you a Hug)))))

[shaheen]

Owl,

my friend, please try to control yourself. we are praying for you. you are not alone.

Cigarette itself is a problem. It cant solve the problem. please think positive. we are here... we are here .... you are not alone my friend. ❤️

[owlfeather]

Who just called?  That was beautiful.  Thank you...

[owlfeather]

Sarah, Legend, Shaheen, thank you.  You are right.  Dale, I love you man.  Thank you...I'm staying right here.  

[owlfeather]

logging off now

[lindan_7-14-10]

Owl, I went through this with my nEXt dooor neighbor a few years back. She was a good friend of mime and her uncle, who lived there went upstairs and killed himself. I have asked for love and light to surround you. I am praying for you dear lady. We all know that smoking will not solve anything, it will only create more negatives. I send my love to you my friend, along with gentle hugs ((( Owlfeather ))) ♥

[Patty70]

I know you will be a great comfort to each other. 

I will pray that you and this grieving family will know " the peace of God that surpasses all understanding" 

[Ex_Nancy]

Let go and let God....cigarettes do nothing but cause more pain. I'ts an old reaction to the pain you are feeling...it's an old way of thinking. Be the warrior that you are Owl...you are strong and your friend needs you...stay close to this site as long as you can an take your Apple with you for when yoy need us....(((((((OWL))))))) ♥

[ninepatch]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend. My God watch over you and bring you peace. 

[gypsy6]

Owlfeather, I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss!  My prayers for your strength and wisdom to carry you through one day at a time while you mourn the loss of your loved one and be a support to your friend are with you.  Please stay close to the group right now let the loving community walk with you through this tragic time for you.

Smoking will only make matters worse, but you know that.  Sending you my prayers, love and strength you can get through this without one puff.

Stay close.

[Newfound_Joy]

Owl, my friend, prayers have already gone up for you and your friend in your time of pain and need right now.  I can hear and feel all the love and warmth everyone has on this site for you.  We all love you too much to see you go back and hurt yourself again.

Stay numb if you like.......just do not smoke.  Of course the shock and grief will make your body feel numb right now.  Think about all the people who love you and how much your friend will NEED YOU now.  She will not need a nicotine addict who is masking her feeling with a drug.

Stay strong and march thru this my warrior friend!!  I know you can do this!! Please take a computer with you.  I am here for you anytime day or night if you want to talk..

Hugs, prayers, and strength to you.

NOPE

NEF

[jojo_2-24-11]

Owl, With this, let peace come to you and your friend. I pray for you and your friend. Stay with us and stay strong.

[JoAnne5-14-2008]

Owlfeather - We are all coming together in prayer for you and your friend.  You are being tested in such a horrible way. Whatever you do, DON'T SMOKE.  I sufferred a great loss 2 months into my quit, but I did not even think about smoking.  Now almost 4 years later, I'm still standing.  You will have to be strong for your friend.  You have a great quit going please don't lose it.  I am praying that God will strengthen you and your friend in this time of bereavement.

[HarborLady]

Owlfeather, I am so very sorry for what you are going through.  My husband commited suicide a few years ago.  You have so many mixed feelings, as if you were paying better attention you could have stopped it.  And the grief is indescribable.  Don't smoke.  NOPE!  Get good and drunk if you have to physically excape the pain for a bit, but don't smoke Sweetie!  My heart, thoughts and especially prayers are with you.

Sharon

[owlfeather]

Checkin in...I know for a fact if I did not come here first, I would have lost my hard, hard, hard earned quit.  I am very grateful to all of you.  I am still numb, which is probably a good thing.  Strange.  I am busy . Doing things, cleaning, putting up a tarp on my shed, baking.  I feel distanced from everything. Very strange don't you think?  It will settle in sometime in the next few days I am sure.  She has her blood family all around her right now, so I will wait.  She is in good hands.  I cannot say how much I appreciate all of you.

I am still FREE.  Thanks to you.

May You Always Walk in Beauty

Owl  

[pir8fan]

We will walk with you, and let your beauty reflect on us!

Stay Free my friend!

[Newfound_Joy]

YOU are an INSPIRATION to all of us!!   Yayyyyy!! 

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[Thomas3.20.2010]

((((((((((((((((((OWLFEATHER)))))))))) We all grieve differently and however you grieve it's all good when it's Life Affirming! Smoking is against LIFE itself! So clean all you want - when the time is right, the numbness will let go and you'll feel things in manageable bits! Stay close to us!

[maja2]

I am so sorry!! You have been a huge help to me with my new quit. I know you can stay strong. My thoughts and prayers are with you Owl!!!

[brenda61]

Praying for you my friend

[joy36]

[joy36]

Prayer's going up for you and your friend. Let your weight fallon God. He will help you get through this. But, you have to let Him do that. Smoking will not make anything better, and you will be sorry and sad you did it. Why add to the trouble ? You will have bad time's to get through, I hope nothing this bad, we all know this is a very hard time for you, but, don't smoke over it. Show yourself how much control you have and don't smoke. If you get through this withoput smoking, you will be able to get through anything. Feel our positive thought's and prayer's coming to you. Prayer's are going up all over the world for you and your friend. Hug's and Prayer's

[Legend]

Just checking back in with you to make sure you will be ok. You did good coming here blogging about what happened and staying busy. You are doing everything right and you will get through this. Hugs ♥

[Brenda_M]

OMG, I am so sorry.  I've been offline all day and to come and see this...my God.

You are so strong. I can't imagine the hell your friend must be going through, but I'm glad she has her family all around her. And you have your EX family all around you.  Blessings to you, love.

[Carenda]

Owl, I'm sending up prayers for you, your friend, and her family,  Also, sending angels to watch over you all.

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[lkb2]

I'm so sorry and so sad to hear of this loss for you and your friend. I know what it's like to lose someone to suicide, and it's hard to bear.  My prayers are with you and your friend. Breaking your quit may just add more to your pain. There are some good websites and books on suicide grief. They helped me so much.  There are also support groups in most areas for those who have lost someone to suicide.  I pray for healing and peace for both of you. 

[Sootie]

Well Owl----you know you are NOT going to smoke my friend.....there is just no way you are going to do it. 

Yes, the thought is there because for so many years it is where we ran to for grief. But my friend Owl Feather knows as well as anyone on EX that a cigarette will do nothing. This tragedy will still have happened and a cigarette will create another.

Your friend does not need your smoking....she needs your compassion, your support and your prayers. 

My prayers join yours for this loss. Be there for your friend and never mind thinking of smoking. You don't smoke.

[Bonnie11.3.2009]

Oh Owl!  I'm so sorry to hear of your friend's child's suicide.  Such devastation.

I will just remind you that you've made a promise to yourself that no matter what you will remain smoke-free.  You may have memories and thoughts of smoking, but you know that smoking is not the answer for you and the stress you're under right now.

Your friend will need you to be there for her many days in the future, long after so many have had to go home and get on with their everyday lives.  She will need your strength and determination and focus.  She will need you.....smoke-free. 

I know of what I speak, my sister has needed me all summer after her only daughter died in June. There are lots of feelings to feel when we don't stuff them down by smoking, but life is better, even in sorrow, when we are who we're meant to be.

I've been thinking about you all day, Owl! I even took a picture for you at the beach today.  As soon as I can, I'll post it for you!

Take Care Owl!

[stonecipher]

I know that there were many times I smoked when I should have cried.  Or smoked when I should have opened the Bible.  Or smoked when I should have walked outside and raised my face up to the sun, or the moon.  When I smoked, I looked inside myself.  That is rarely a good place to look.  We do better when we look out, look ahead, look at others, look past the pain and lift our heads up and see.

God bless you.

[Roby2]

Owlfeather, all of us are with you,we will help you through this without those.as shaheen wrote,problems can't find solutions or comfort in a problem,in grief and deep sorrow.stay on be strong and serene as you are,many prayers to you and your friend,hugs,rob

[SmokedOut041412]

So sad---So sorry! 😞

[MarcieWhosoever]

Im sorry Owl. Just saw this. 

Stay strong. I will send prayers for you and your friend. Im so sorry