Finally, my slip up...

[tink13]

Hi everyone,

I'm sad to say that I finally caved in at my 1 week mark and smoked a cigarette behind a waffle house... I was with a group of friends, all of which were smoking, and someone pulled out a marlboro smooth (my one weakness). I couldn't resist. It had been a rough day for me as far as my quitting thing. I started the day with a big meal, a convention (where I used to go just to smoke cause I could be away from my parents for the whole day) and ended with 6 hours at waffle house with friends. It was 3:30 am, we were all sitting in a circle telling stories and such when the deaf girl pulled out a Smoothe. After I had spent the last 2 hours rejecting every cigarette offered to me, I finally caved in when I smelled that Smoothe.

I do not intend to let this tiny slip up alter my goals in any way. It was one cigarette, out of my system and since then I've been back on track with no hesitation. At least I made it a week. I'm not sure how to go about better preparing for such an event as saturday night's waffle house hang out. Maybe I'll take my non-nicotine ecig with me incase I get another uncontrolable urge...but I'm affraid that the ecig will only do more harm than good...I'm not sure how to fix my mistake, but I dont intend to let it happen again.

Withdrawal symptoms are going away for the most part. Insomnia's getting better already, acne is clearing up, fatigue is gone. Still coughing up a lot of stuff, but at least its getting out of my lungs...

I still feel pretty good about all of this. It's day 8 and I'm still going strong. (minus the slight slip up). That last cigarette made me want to quit even more than I did when I started. Keeping on!

Just wanted to get that off my chest. thanks.

[joyeuxencore]

Hey there Tink...It is actually day one if you smoked but that's the least of your concerns!

Sounds like you were doing fine but maybe leave after one hour instead of 3 and stay inside instead of going out with the smokers or better yet give yourself more than one week to be around a group of smokers who you used to smoke with!

BRAVO for not letting the 'lapse' become a full blown 'relapse'!

[tink13]

Does it start over even if I don't reset my quit date? I mean it makes sense, but thats so discouraging for some reaosn 😞

[havoc2]

I'm far from being an expert, but it seems that the logical reason why a slip up becomes a full relapse, is the guilt you might feel afterward.
You make yourself the idea that you're never ever EVER lighting up again, so slipping becomes this horrible failure and you get discouraged, lose confidence and since you feel weak, you give in.
Accept that you might slip up once in a while especially now that you have started quitting. Acceptance doesn'tmean self indulgence, so keep strong.
I would say, keep your date, if it makes you feel better. The date isn't that important, what matters is your attitude towards smoking.
Just saying...

[tink13]

yeah thats true..

[smorgy8513]

If you smoke you reset your quit date.   Don't focus on it being discouraging...don't smoke anymore.    

In 1 way it is an incentive for me not to smoke....if I smoke, I have to reset and I'm not wanting to re-set my quit date.

This is just my opinion.....you will probably get more of them from others soon.    

[Jordan-11-1-12]

It doesn't matter what our opinions are about starting over after a lapse because its just a fact.  Smoking (even just one) re awakens the receptors in our brains and puts us physically, chemically back to the start.  Its just fact.

Try not to feel discouraged or beat yourself up about it.  Just figure out why somewhere inside you still think smoking does something good, and then educate by doing the reading in order to help change your thinking.  We all think like addicts at first and need to keep working to change that. 

NOPE== Not One Puff Ever.

My opinion is that what havoc said is false and will only give new people excuses to lapse.  Our addictive thoughts will use anything and everything and twist it all around to try and talk ourselves into smoking.   Just because you chose to light up and ruin your quit once does not mean you will again.  I haven't.... and many people I know haven't.   Protect your quit.

You can do this!  And if you figure out what went wrong and how to prevent it from happening again you will never have to do day 1 again!

[Mike.n.Atlanta]

Not really concerned about your quit clock or whether you reset it or not. The best way to prepare for such an event as last Saturday's Waffle House hangout is to not put yourself into a position of potential failure. Make a real commitment & practice NOPE. You managed a week so I know you can do this. You are much stronger than that Marlboro Smooth.

Really...there's a cigarette called Smooth?

Keep on keepin on,

M n @

[Crunkgrinder]

I agree with Smorgy, personally. I'm terrified to slip up because I don't want to go all the way back to day 1! It doesn't matter what others think, though. It matters what YOU think. It's YOUR quit.

I had to stop hanging around my smoking friends for at least the first month of my quit. If they are really your friends, they will understand. I have also made many new NON smoking friends. My boyfriend also quit because of me 😉

-Taylor, day 103

[havoc2]

You people act like religious nuts brainwashing yourselves into thinking that smoking is the devil.
Yes, smoking is nasty, everybody here can attest to that, and we're all trying to improve. Telling her to avoid it like it's a sin, doesn't help. Copy pasting premade meaningless phrases, or macros won't help her either.
I understand most of you are older folk, and you have other ways to deal with stuff, but seriously people.

[Jordan-11-1-12]

its an addiction, havoc and an addiction that kills more people than any other addiction. that's all.

[Mike.n.Atlanta]

@ Havoc:

"Accept that you might slip up once in a while"...well that's quite a defeatist attitude. How many times have you slipped since you began your quit?

KOKO,

M n @

[Jordan-11-1-12]

havoc, since you are still actively and willingly feeding your addiction by smoking, your addictive thinking is at its highest, so its no wonder that you're so defensive.  But this isn't your blog so lets just play nice.

[Mike.n.Atlanta]

@ Jordan: Oh...see I didn't know Havoc hadn't begun a quit yet. I just assumed that a strong quit was in process after reading the comments.

My sincere apologies Havoc.

KOKO,

M n @

[havoc2]

Yeah, yeah, I'm possessed by the devil of nicotine. I know how to defeat it, throw in a bunch of macros and copy paste the same links to the same information we all already know, that sure will exorcise it. Not rational thinking and understanding of addiction!
You're pretty crazy people, thankfully it took me only 2 days to realize it.
Tink, don't get discouraged, independently of what I or the others here said. Good luck with everything!

[Mike.n.Atlanta]

Actually Havoc we only brainwash subliminally. See just in the short time you've been here we've been bombarding your brain with powerful quitting mantras. For instance, from now on when someone says "NOPE" to you or you hear the word in any capacity, the phrase "Not One Puff Ever" will flash through your mind. It's unavoidable. You are now one of the damned.

Keep on keepin on, (that's my catch phrase)

M n @

[Jordan-11-1-12]

Isn't it so helpful when people who have not quit think they know everything about quitting?  To the point where they feel the need to insult and dissagree with long time quitters (Mike, not me... i only have 11 months).

I'm sure he also believes that AA is a fly by night cult, which will never help those addicted to alcahol and therefore won't last more than a month in this society.... I mean, with "One Day at a Time"  "Take it Easy"  and their other catch phrases being repeated.... there is no way they know anything about addictin or beating.....

Sorry that we kinda highjacked your blog, Tink.  Please pay attention to those who are successful, and do whatever works to get free of this addiction.  😃

[whognu_1-2007]

LOL

one of the damned!

[Michwoman]

Hi Tink. So sorry.  I'm concerned over the title of your blog.  "Finally, my slip up". It sounds to me as if you were waiting for it to happen, as if it was inevitable.  That's pretty much a guarantee that you will fail. It's absolutely essential that smoking be taken out of the equation as an option EVER.  Have you read Allen Carr's book?  Here's the link for you:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

It has helped many many people tremendously. No lecturing, just education about why we have such a hard time quitting smoking.

Also whyquit.com is very cool. Lots of informative videos and reading. Here's a sample:

http://whyquit.com/whyquit/joelcigfriend.HTML

I'm very glad you got back on the horse right away. You know, I don't really care about your clock, but you will always be thinking to yourself "except that one" every time you say you have quit. 

Please avoid taking advice from someone who has not succeeded and feels it appropriate to criticize successful quitters. 

Keep going - you CAN do it!!!

[pir8fan]

Tink! Take what you need and leave the rest! The title of your blog does imply that you have reached a point that you EXpected to reach! It is time to start over! With better EXpectations! I would suggest that you start with a new date, so when you reach the one year mark, you can be proud of that FULL YEAR without that little voice asking if you really made it! Whatever you do, quit, And stay quit! You will be prouder than you have ever been before!!

Now as far as things you should leave, please ignore the rest of this!

Now Hear This! All of you long term quitters, on your knees! We have a new leader who was able, in just two days, to determine that all that has worked here for so many years is wrong! We now know that if we apply the same logic that someone still smoking uses, that all will work out good! Realize, as we are told, that we are old and know nothing! How quickly we forgot what is was like to be younger, and really know everything! We are now told that smoking is "Nasty"! Stop the presses! Really? Here we were  just thinking it was a Deadly Addiction! But what could we possibly know? Thank you sharing your wisdom Havoc!

[mary242]

yup, what he said!!       Mary

[smorgy8513]

Is he the one who recently (under different name) tore apart every old person on the site because we didn't want to hear vulgar words?    He then was taken off.   This kinda sounds like him.    Maybe a brother?????? (smile)

[harleymama80]

Wow this group is tough! I have a week to go before I quit and negativity is the last thing I would want to hear! So I say move on and tomorrow is another day ! I hope I have the strength and will power to do this!

[ret]

DITTO Pir8fan---perfectly said.  Thank you

RET Quit 5-12-2013

[tink13]

OK, OK you all make a lot of sense, with the exception of havoc. I see all of your points. I am thinking much more clearly now. Thanks again for all your support and I absolutely encourage you take over my blogs to discuss things! I will restart my quit date today since I've already gone three days without after my slip up. And yes I was expecting it to happen, which I see now is kind of messed up to begin with, hehe.

New quit date, new attitude, starting now! here we go!

Thanks again everyone! ❤️

PS: Havoc, your criticism was equally not helpful as these phrases and macros. Keep in mind, some of us know that if we don't take this as seriously as possible, it just wont happen. It may be silly and we may turn into nuts for a period of time, but sometimes thats the only way we will stick to our guns. (I speak entirely for myself of course). But you CANNOT be unsupportive in a place like this. It hurts more people than you think. Just sayin' 🙂