I almost didn't log on today because one of my readers is kind of attacking me through my inbox. He(?) says "no further communication is necessary", so hopefully he means it. This is one scenario where rejection is welcome. It's discouraging to be continuously corrected and judged on everything I say, and not to mention completely misunderstood! Frustrating! And if there's one thing a new quitter doesn't need, it's unnecessary frustration! I'm sure you'd all agree.
The reference was to when I said "people are still rude and thoughtless", and I want to be clear, but I'm pretty sure everyone else knew what I meant, but just in case, I was talking about when the people we love ARE rude and thoughtless to us. It HAPPENS! They're still fine people, we still love them, there's nothing WRONG with them, OR US! Sometime I can be rude and thoughtless, I'm sure sometimes YOU can be rude and thoughtless. We apologize, and are forgiven (or not) and they apologize to us and we forgive (or not) and we move on! It's just that, before, when I smoked, the apology part usually got skipped because I escaped the confrontation by going out to smoke. Now I face it head on. The feelings are still icky, but actually less so. I would go out to smoke and DWELL on the insult. I'd let it fester and bother me. Each time this happened it built up into a big "everyone is mean to me" issue in my life. So NOW when this happens, (and I don't know where my critic got the idea I was judging anyone, I'm not, we're all human, we all make mistakes), anyway, NOW when this happens, I deal with it in the moment, and it doesn't build up. And it doesn't hurt as much. And the relationship is strengthened. So I hope no one else thought I was being "judgmental". I'm not even sure how that would fit with what I was talking about. Judgment is when you judge something as bad or good. I didn't do that.
Reading everyone's blogs is like nutrition to me. It's the first thing I do every morning when I get to school. I often comment, but this computer doesn't always save the post. So a lot of my responses get lost. I depend on all of your experiences, opinions, questions and answers. It would be sad for me to have to avoid the site because I am afraid of being scolded every time I post.
I check in a few times a day to see if anyone has commented on my blog, and it's like getting letters in the mail. It feels so great! I feel LOVED! So I'm sorry if I offended anyone else. That wasn't my intention, or my message.
About my running, yes, still going strong! I've pulled a muscle in my groin, so it's the elliptical and some upper body weight lifting at the gym today, but to answer your question, I don't really know how FAR I'm running, but I go for half an hour in total, and I run for three minutes or so, walk for two, run for three again, walk for two, like that. Yeah, I would love to do a 5k someday, but my true passion is cycling. A triathlon is what I'm really aiming for. Next summer I think. I have years of illness (Crohn's, but I'm better now) to recover from, not to mention the smoking. So I'm giving myself lots of time to build up the strength and stamina. Thanks for the encouragement! 🙂
Not sure why my Day 8 blog posted twice, but it was cool to get comments on each of them. LOL
Oh yeah, here's my juicy quote for the day, "Trying to control your addiction by planning, bargaining, making rules and other mental gymnastics is like rearranging the deck chairs on the titanic. No matter what you do, that sucker is GOING DOWN!" Isn't that GREAT?!
Have a great day everyone! and NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF! Whoohoo!
