4 Days & Nights Of Relapse

[Peacecat]

I quit on January 8th 2020.  I picked up on August 17th 2020.  I have had a headache every night.  I am smoking as if I had never stopped and I want to stop.  I don’t want to wait too long.  My new quit date is this Tuesday, a day I normally talk to my therapist, a 12 Step recovery partner and my 89 year old uncle.  I have a list of names of people to text or call for support.  I have a list of things to do instead of smoke and to fight a crave inspired by a list I read on this site.  I am in the process of going through BecomeAnEx to get some insight into my triggers and what to do when they come up.  I’m looking for feedback and support.  I am 58 years old and have been on average a pack a day smoker for 30 years.  I’ve quit for over three years and for over seven months (twice).  Time before this time I was vaping with 0 nicotine and it did help and eventually I stopped with that too.  I still have the vape mods and some 0 nicotine e-juice and will use that for the first week or so.  All I know is that I can’t give up.  I do not want to be a cigarette smoker.

[Barbscloud]

Welcome to the Ex and congrats on your decision to quit.   Most of us have multiple attempts at quitting and you've had some big successes.  We learn from those experiences and think of all the cigarettes you didn't smoke!    It sounds like your planning and preparing for your upcoming date.  For me, educating myself about nicotine addiction and having a quit plan made all the difference.  I found this site a week before my quit and the support has been amazing.   There are quitters on the Ex at every stage of quitting, so there's lots of good advice and support. 

Stay close and reach out anytime you need encouragement or want to share your experience.

Looking forward to celebrating with you on Tuesday.  

Barb

[sweetplt]

Hi and Welcome to Ex’s Peacecat glad you found our site.  It is good you are working the program.  Learn from your past and figure out how you would do different this time.  One thing many of us have learned is we are one cigarette from a pack, so we can never have just one.  Keep close to the support site, we are here to help...sounds like your close to a forever quit...Happy Saturday ~ Colleen 628 DOF 

[YoungAtHeart]

Welcome to the community!

What a glorious gaggle of kitties!!! 

Congratulations on your decision to quit again so soon after you lapsed.  That's very wise.    SO glad you found us and are working to prepare for this quit!   I have a bit more preparation and planning work to suggest.

The important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This easy and entertaining read provided a world of good information about nicotine addiction, most of which I was not aware.  I credit it in large part with my success at quitting.   You can search for it online or at your local library.

It will be informative if you do the tracking and separation exercises recommended here on the site. As you track each cigarette smoked, note its importance, and what you might do instead. Put each one off just a little to prove that you don't NEED a cigarette just because you think you do.
 

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work and other places you normally go.  Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.
 
You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy! 

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

 Nancy

[maryfreecig]

Until we get a significant distance from the addiction, behavior modification is the tried and true way to quit. Everything you listed on your quit to-do list involves behavior modification! Good for you! Stay strong in that. Most of us want our mind to recover first, then quit. Often it is all about one foot in front of the other one day at a time. Looks like you have that covered--great work--keep it up.

Quit Kit aka Tool Box 

Helpful Blogs, Discussions, Comments, Videos, Links, Info Re Quitting 

/blogs/Marilyn.H.July.14.14.-blog/2019/10/28/with-committment-we-can-will-succeed 

[Peacecat]

Thank you for the welcome Barb.  I appreciate all of you who lend support to people like me struggling with nicotine addiction.  I am going to stay close to this site as you suggested and do a lot of reading and some commenting.  I feel reassured to have set my quit date.  It puts things in perspective.  

Kate  

[Peacecat]

Thank you Colleen for the support and feedback.  I have started to isolate my triggers and today I’m going to write out what to do in those situations.  Coming here is one of the best things I have done so far.  I’m very grateful to this site and to the people who post here.  

Kate

[Peacecat]

Hi Nancy and thank you for the welcome and suggestions.  I appreciate that you took the time to write to me!  I have been doing some of the exercises on this site and they have really been helping me to hold on to the right attitude.  This is a good time to test out my triggers and try doing something different to delay smoking, good practice.  I’m grateful that I can pay for my gas at the pump instead of going inside to the store, though people outside smoking is one of my triggers, but I can go when no one is outside.  I do want to do something different that is healthy when I get triggered, so I will turn to my list of activities.  Stay well and smoke free.

Kate

[Peacecat]

Thank you Mary for the support!  I appreciate it and will look at some of the links that you listed.  On Tuesday it will be one minute, one hour, one day at a time.  This is a wonderful place to connect with others and share experience, strength and hope.  Thanks again.  

Kate

[beazel]

Hi Kate & welcome!

I was 58 when I decided that this was my sticky quit, and I smoked over 46 years.

(I  was a serial quitter and also had a couple substantial quits under my belt)

You seem better prepared and have a good mindset. Both will serve you well.

Please stick around, a quit smoking forum made all the difference for me & I think it will for you too.

Post often, we all know what you are going through and are here to support you every step of the way!!

[SMILINACCOUNTNT]

Love the kitties - have a little orange furball myself. Even if you don't post a lot, it's helpful to come here and read, I've often done that when other distractions aren't working. Helps to get you out of your own head! 

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Please read these blogs when you have the opportunityStay Connected‌ and https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/newbie-quitters/blog/2019/08/14/keep-it-simple?sr=search&s...‌ Thanks. 

[Strudel]

Welcome to the site and congrats on deciding to quit! I was 59 when I quit after 40 years of smoking after coming here - and that was 10 years ago! So - I know you can do this! The support here is great - be sure to stay close. Congrats again! 

[Strudel]

PS - Love your pic of the cats! 

[CrazyQuitter]

WOW that is a HARD relapse! When I smoked I didn't smoke as long as you did. I did it for 2 years and I started to hate it! But I believe in you! Even those who had smoke for many years have a lot of potential to quit for good. You just gotta really want it and protect that quit like a boss. You learnt a lot from this relapse. It's definitely is something to take on board for life. You CAN do it. Have that conversation with yourself about those nasty cravings, give yourself words encouragement and feel rewarded that you are free and can breathe easier!