I want going to post again but I am back and not giving up. The link to alcohol for me is the key. After doing some deep research and introspection I have discovered more understanding of my addictions. I get going on my quit, start feeling so much better, then I go through some mental stuff, get too many feelings, brain gets clogged, then I drink. All down hill from there. I had quit and was feeling good this time. Then another if my aunts just passed away suddenly and I have to go back to VB. I just wanted to be doing something unhealthy and familiar. What is that? So dumb.