social smoking after you've quit

[kate16]

just wondering what others think on the issue.
the thing I love the most about smoking is the social aspect (at a cafe with friends, outside at a party)
is it reasonable for an ex to occasionally have a cigarette after the addiction is gone?
and if so.. how long after they have quit?

[louise2]

Hi, Kate,
In my opinion the addiction is never gone. I've learned this the hard way. I would love to be able to smoke socially. I've tried it a million times. I've tricked myself into thinking I can. But, in my case, it is clearly untrue. Some people seem to be able to do that. perhaps, you are one of those people. But, a word to the wise, watch yourself carefully. Nicotine addiction is a very insidious addiction indeed. Best of luck in your quit. Louise

[louise2]

Helllo Hammer!
I like your reply to Kate. Particularly, the last sentence, I have been thinking about that myself for an entire day now. Since my mind, plays tricks on me thinking I'll just have one or I'll just smoke for today, I don't ever want to have to Quit again ever, either and this so farr has been helping me to stay quit. In the past, when I have quit and started again "One by One!" to a full blown smoker again each time in between quitting has gotten longer and more difficult for me to get my head around quitting again. It seems when I do get to the point of actually quitting, for me half the battle is over. it just takes me a long time to get there! Sometimes a year or more. So, thanks for your insight as to not wanting to ever HAVE to quit again. It helps. Aloha, Louise

[christine2007]

Louise and Chris, I completely agree with you. I am only a PUFF away from a PACK a day! I once quit for 12 years and then took a job surrounded by smokers. I "thought" I could just socialize with them and have a drag or a cigarette here and there... uh huh. No. Once an addict, always an addict.

It would be the same for a crack or heroine addict to say... well, I'll just shoot up or light up just this once. Right.

I will never be that stupid again. I now know that no cigarette will touch these lips ever again. I can't risk it. I'm smoke free now for 9 months and 1 day and loooooooooooving every minute of it. Nothing can tempt me off of this now that I know what the risk is.

Besides, I've gotten quite used to having my mouth and lips taste and smell sweet. No more foul breath and yellow teeth. Even my profile picture shows how yellow my teeth got. So, no more for me.

Christine

[louise2]

Hi Christine, Wow, 12 years!! I get it. I quit for 2 years once and started again on a cruise. My next cruise will be a smoke free one! I can not trust myself and now you have said after twelve years! That scares me. I truly am an addict, And I am an addictions counselor!!!! Ihelp alot of alcoholics and drug addicts but, have tremendous difficulty with my own addiction to Nicotine. Amazing isn't it.. I even think o.k. I'll quit now because I have smoked for more than half of my life and if I'm fortunate enough to live to be old and in good health then I can smoke then when I'm really old. I can't believe I even had a thought like this. I have to work very hard to keep my reasons for quitting a big part of everyday. I'm at 2 weeks smoke free right now this time and feeling good about it oh, and by the way get this, Many years ago, I was buying a car at a dealership and trading in my old car and the saleman said to me, and I quote, "You have never used the ashtray" I said "I never ever use the ashtrays in any car I have ever owned, They look so nasty when used and I like my cars.. Guess what he said to me........This has stayed with me for all these years, He said, "If you like clean, new ashtrays in your car, what do you think about your lungs"...I couldn't believe he would be so bold. he was absolutely right. I cared more about my car than I did myself!!!! I too am enjoying my car not smelling ... And I have never smoked inside my house either. Thanks for you insights. It has given me even more clarity. Aloha, Louise

[louise2]

Hi Peggy,
Love the way you put it! Congratulations to you and I hope to be able to say the same someday. Right to the minute and seconds. Your words of wisdom and experience helps to give a new and totally different perspective. Thanks. Louise

[christine2007]

Linda, I can relate. There's that "bonding" thing that I think some of the quitting quitters worry about... whether or not they'll have "NORMAL" friends without the butts... you know... the kind of friends who get together just to have fun, or a quiet night, or play cards, or have a drink... without smoking.

Now, when I see the "castouts" standing in some godforsaken place in all kinds of weather... (or I walk in our out of buildings where the lingering gagging smell of butts remains... I'm happy I'm NOT one of them. There's nothing glamorous about the way a cigarette looks between two yellowed fingers wrapped around a drink any longer... for me.

Christine

[louise2]

I TOO CAN NOT BE A SOCIAL SMOKER. NO SUCH THING IN MY LIFE. IT'S PROBABLY JUST AS WELL BECAUSE EVEN SOCIAL SMOKING IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH. CONGRAT'S HOLLY ON YOUR QUIT. YOUR WORDS ARE INSPIRING TO ME BECAUSE, EACH TIME I QUIT IN THE PAST AND HAVE STARTED AGAIN...ALWAY'S TRIED TO BE A SOCIAL SMOKER AND EVEN THOUGH I KNOW IT DOESN'T WORK FOR ME I HAVE CONVINCED MYSELF THAT I COULD DO IT THIS TIME!!1 IT HAS TAKEN ME LONGER TO QUIT EACH TIME BUT, NOT 7 YEARS! sO, NOW I KNOW MORE ABOUT THE MIND PLAYING TRICKS ON YOU... THANKS, STAY STRONG IN YOUR QUIT.

[diana11]

I agree with you I NEVER ever want to do this AGAIN. It was so hard to get this far. Plus now cigarettes stink to me. I cant see picking up that 1 cigarette at all. It can send us right back to where we were before we came here.
But it is great that you came here and asked our opinions. You can make your own decision. But as for me 1 is to many and 1000 is not enough. I will have 4 months in 2 days. I love my quit and i love this group.

[marty8]

I've got to agree with what everyone has said, so far. I've be an EX for over 15 month now, and I still want a smoke. I not going to give in because quitting was an awful experience. I do not want to do that again. Whenever I fell like smoking only one, I tell myself -- One is to many, and a million are not enough.

Lately, my addiction has suggested chewing some Nicorette. It's not smoking; it's just gum. I've resisted that because I shouldn't really need nicotine after a year. This mental exercise shows me that the nicotine receptors are still present in my brain. Admittedly there are not as many as there were a year ago.

Let's make sure we always do what we can to protect our quit. I will never buy, borrow, or beg a butt. If I really want so bad, I should look in an ashtray for something smokable. (Sometime we have to be stern with ourselve.)

Peace
Marty