I'm a whiner, but...

[TW517]

I’m a whiner.  When a cold or flu goes thru our household, I am the biggest complainer, even if my symptoms were less and lasted for a shorter period than my wife and kids.  If the boss makes everyone stay late to complete a project, my inconvenience far outweighs everyone else’s.  I know this about myself, and I’ve been working on improving this bad trait for years. 

When I was 30, 40, 50, even 60 days into my quit, I was struggling and complaining about it even though it seemed like most of the people who quit around the same time as me were feeling great.  I attributed this to my typical whiney nature.  But after reading Doug’s blog /blogs/dwwms-blog/2017/11/28/250-days-and-yet  and Dale’s response,

Doug, I've never pinpointed the connection from when people quit using nicotine long term as to how it relates to no mans land. There's just no way I can get any data. That being said....perhaps it has a relation to how your feeling if you've only been off nicotine for 45 days.That being said, give it some more time. It'll pass.

As a Cold Turkey quitter, now I’m wondering if maybe my struggles were a bit more real than just perceived.  Obviously, someone on a 21mg patch who is also taking 4mg of gum or lozenges occasionally to get thru those “rough patches”, is not feeling anything like a cold turkey quitter at that same point in time.  So now I’m wondering how many of those who seemed to be doing so much better than me, were on NRTs and what dosage.

It seems the most common question for Newbies is, “Is what I’m feeling now normal?”  But if a Cold Turkey quitter is comparing themselves to an NRT quitter who posts a similar “DOF” tagline, they are doing themselves a disservice.  I kind of wish there were 2 Quit Dates in the “My Quit Plan” section of our website.  One for the day you quit smoking cigarettes (well worth celebrating regardless if you are still using NRTs) and another for the day you quit using any kind of nicotine.  Thoughts?  Other than, "Oh Tom, quit your whining!"

[TW517]

I had a good friend who quit smoking a year ago.  I was having coffee at an outdoor cafe with him about 7 days into my quit, when he asked why I hadn't lit up a cigarette yet.  I told him I had quit and was doing it cold turkey.  He said, "Oh don't do that!  That's too hard!".  And he pulled out a small case from his pocket with several of those disposable e-cigarettes and offered me one.  I asked him if he had been using those since he quit a year ago, and he said yes, several times a day.  I declined his offer.  And when I got home, I destroyed the small stash of nicotine lozenges I still had in a drawer.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

nicotine replacement does not make you think of smoking less often but it sure could make you begin to think of nicotine more often. Then you're on it, years later.

[Deb-EX]

Can't disagree at all with that Dale. Speaking for myself as a 1st time quitter, I am more concerned with the phycological part of the addiction right now. Having a cigarette in my hand for 35 years and suddenly NOT is a huge loss to me. When I feel like I have changed my routine up enough to not feel that loss as hard, I will move onto the next step. Just not smoking cigarettes is my priority. In the last 17 days, I've made so many changes to my "normal" routine, and still struggling even with the patch. Each day that screaming thought of go grab a cigarette first has been slowly quieting down... This morning I got my coffee and didn't even think of a cigarette. To me that is success, I guess we all have to do whatever it is that we have to do to try and be a success. I haven't even told anyone other than my husband and son I have stopped.. I don't want to fail, therefore I will stay on my patches for as long as I need to. This support group has helped more than I can ever say...

[JonesCarpeDiem]

we don't control with the patch, that's why I like it.  🙂

[BB-COCKTAILS-2]

i just came across you're post, i just inform my eldest, i stop smoking 71 days ago . SHE  is very  Proud  of MOM.

[TW517]

YAY!  Good for you!  I was like you in my early quit, I didn't tell anyone I was quitting.  It wasn't from a fear that I would fail.  I just got so tired of all the "How are you doing" questions on previous quits.  It really did feel good as I slowly broke the news to loved ones that I had 20, 30 60, etc. days quit.

[c2q]

I am all for whining. Whine while you're driving. On your way to the store, stick you head out the window and yell "my quit is harder than anybody else's in the world!" While you are scrubbing the floor, explain to the scrub brush how no one understands your quit. While you cook dinner for your wife and kids, sing the Whiney Song Whiney, Whiney.

When you're whined out, your cupboards will be full, your kitchen will be clean, your family will think you're the best... and you'll also be that much stronger in your quit. I am all for whining.

[TW517]

OMG!  How is it I have never heard this song until now?!?!  This is my new theme song!  JonesCarpeDiem‌, can we have this song play automatically upon entering the Poor Tom's Hangout site feature?

[JonesCarpeDiem]

let me finish straightening me dreadlocks and me spliff and I'll tell you you better check with Mark on that.

[TW517]

"explain to the scrub brush how no one understands your quit"  I'm definitely adding that one to my quit tool box