How to leave go of an old friend?

[jynx]

Been smoking for over 40 years. I was ready to quit and sucessfully did so March 9th (cold turkey, no meds). It was difficult but I did so and stayed off the cigs for 2 week. Then out of nowhere one night, no excuses, I felt I "HAD" to have one, and like a crack addict, I searched through waste baskets in my garage to find butts I could still light up to take a hit or two. So embarrassing while I was doing so, but I did, shaking my head in disbelief.

I can go for hours without a strong urge to smoke, then out of no where I start feeling tense, my chest gets tight, and it becomes overwhelming... all I can think of is getting a cigarette and taking just a puff or two.

I know I'm  past the addiction period, and realize it's a mental thing. For me it's like loosing a long-time friend, crazy as it sounds. As much as I want to quit, I can't imagine not smoking for the rest of my life. It feels as if smoking is a part of my life and it's so hard not to have it there. I look at my friends who don't smoke and envy them for never thinking about smoking.

I want to be a non-smoker... not a smoker who quit and misses it everyday!

How long does that take to sink in??????????

[kate8]

I wiss I could comment

[kate8]

Wow. Didn't know I could. I lost a 3 month quit, but Im taking it back right now....

[birdie2]

I am having a terrible time.  Have quit many times in the 40 years I have smoked.  Once I made it for 3 years but all it took was one cigarette.  Now I am ill with sinus, pain, asthma and lung spasms.  I look at it now is it quit in the hospital or at home?  I tried to wean myself off with alternating cigs and nicorette gum but it does not work.  when I get an urge to smoke I think of drving to the store to get the cigarettes, not the act itself.  Too bad the gas station is 30 seconds away by car.  I hate myself for being so weak and am scared, really scared.  For the first time in my life I have too much time on my hands so even though you may think it is easier with no job stress that is not true at all for I know you need to be occupied and busy.  When I do quit I get so tired I can't even do anything around the house.  Day one of nic. and then bought a pack. Help, someone. ha!  it helped though to read take it one hour at a time.  I need to read this web site for help and preparation that is for sure for no one can quit for myself but me.

[dorrie]

I quit over a year ago and then 1year and 10 days later, I really wanted a smoke and bought a pack.  They tasted terrible, but I still smoked them, but not a lot.  Now I am starting all over again on the patch.  So I guess the urge to smoke stays with you for a long time.  It is now 16 days and I hope not to smoke again.  Has anyone else gone a long time and then smoked like me?  I would love to hear from you.

[goblinbox]

I'm thinking there should be some kind of ceremony. Like a funeral for the loss of that 'old friend,' smoking. Hmm.

[jasonculden2]

must better stop smoking. it is bad to your health...lol... Take a visit for san leandro flowers

[austin]

That's a great idea to bury that old friend.  One time when I quit I did that on halloween.  I made a casket out of a shoe box, had it on my desk all day at work and went home and buried it.  Great idea but it reared it's ugly head in the next month.  I still am smoking.  Oh my God it's been 35 years of on and off smoking.  I started at age 15.  I think it was to replace me not having a Dad around and MoM taking care of 9 of us kids on her own.  The cig gave me the attention I was starving for.  I don't know what it's giving me now accept more time spent at the Dr.  I want to quit and stay quit.  The more I think about quitting the more I want that stupid cigarette.

[kate8]

I'm Over 100 days Free and Healing now. If I Can----Then I Know You Can. Write a Goodbye Letter to that No Good Habit! End It-- Once-And- For- All.....

[Thomas3.20.2010]

That cigarette is DEFINITELY not your friend! It is killing you with every puff you take!!! Once you break the Addiction you'll recognize that! You have an inkling or you wouldn't be here! Find out more in the BLOGS where most of us hang out!!!

[scrapperd]

I'm not sure I should be giving advice, but one thing that really helped me was to say "I'm not trying, I am quitting".  However, as I prepare to quit once again, I know that the one thing that has killed all my attempts (one longer than a year) was thinking I can have just one!  I even smoked a pack and when back to quitting, but eventually it grabs you again, so when I get ready this time (hopefully soon) I know not to have "just that one" ever and will have to do the one hour at a time no matter what.