First of all I want to appoligise to everyone for disapearing for the last week or so. My girlfriend Hailey fley all the way from California to come see me. Actually she was vacationing in Maui with her sisters and left a week early to come out and see me while I was off for those 2 weeks. So I was very preoccupied an was having nearly NOTHING for urges to smoke. I was doing great.
Well, on Monday I had to take her back to the airport. Goodbyes with her have simply gotten harder and harder since being together and making that nearly 2 hour drive bck from the airport is the loneliest thing Ive ever had to do. So Im already just feeling completly shitty but theres NO urge to smoke. Thats the last thing I was thinking about. But before I got back home I had to pick up a buddy of mine at a different airport. So I pick him up and its still another half hour to the house. Now ALL my buddies have been gone through my entire quit thus far so they dont know about it yet. So he grabs his cigs and asks if I want one(he knows Im just hating life at the moment) and I would normally take one. So not even thinking about it I said yea and hit lit them both up and handed me one. I started smokin with him while he told stories about how his 2 weeks at home was and all of a sudden it hits me. I remember that I dont smoke anymore. I start laughing and toss it out the window and hes like "What?" And I tell him that I quit and that it had been 9 days since my last one.
I never had the URGE to smoke it. I never NEEDED to smoke it. But I was just so fixated on saying goodbye to Hailey that I forgot that I had quit. The good news is that I really havent felt any 'extra' cravings or anything so I dont think that its been too 'hurtful'. But I DO think that its only fair to set my clock back to 0:00, call that a failed quit and start over. So I am now on day 2 of my second quit.
Thank you to everyone for your support and Im not too worried about this anymore. I think Im going to walk all over this addiction with no more stopages.
