9 days and relapse

[jordan4]

First of all I want to appoligise to everyone for disapearing for the last week or so. My girlfriend Hailey fley all the way from California to come see me. Actually she was vacationing in Maui with her sisters and left a week early to come out and see me while I was off for those 2 weeks. So I was very preoccupied an was having nearly NOTHING for urges to smoke. I was doing great.

Well, on Monday I had to take her back to the airport. Goodbyes with her have simply gotten harder and harder since being together and making that nearly 2 hour drive bck from the airport is the loneliest thing Ive ever had to do. So Im already just feeling completly shitty but theres NO urge to smoke. Thats the last thing I was thinking about. But before I got back home I had to pick up a buddy of mine at a different airport. So I pick him up and its still another half hour to the house. Now ALL my buddies have been gone through my entire quit thus far so they dont know about it yet. So he grabs his cigs and asks if I want one(he knows Im just hating life at the moment) and I would normally take one. So not even thinking about it I said yea and hit lit them both up and handed me one. I started smokin with him while he told stories about how his 2 weeks at home was and all of a sudden it hits me. I remember that I dont smoke anymore. I start laughing and toss it out the window and hes like "What?" And I tell him that I quit and that it had been 9 days since my last one.

I never had the URGE to smoke it. I never NEEDED to smoke it. But I was just so fixated on saying goodbye to Hailey that I forgot that I had quit. The good news is that I really havent felt any 'extra' cravings or anything so I dont think that its been too 'hurtful'. But I DO think that its only fair to set my clock back to 0:00, call that a failed quit and start over. So I am now on day 2 of my second quit.

Thank you to everyone for your support and Im not too worried about this anymore. I think Im going to walk all over this addiction with no more stopages.

[meka]

Hey Jordan, How ya doin? I know all too well how you feel, Just try not to beat yourself up too much about it, because when you do that you start to feel like "oh well, I already blew it so I might as well smoke" and that's not what you want to do...and trust me most of us have been there a time or two, so no judgement here...also I wanted to add that you are NOT a failure , you've accomplished alot so far with being 9 days quit and Im sure It was'nt easy, so don't throw it all away, you slipped but you caught yourself, you did'nt have a total relapse, now with that being said, Im not condoning what you did, Im just firmly saying your not condemed either so forget about the clock for now, this is not a race Its all about kicking this addiction and becoming a healthier you - Get Up, Dust Yourself Off and Get back On The Wagon- and don't look back, what your main concern should be at this point is planning ahead and having a strategy on how to better handle situations like that, where was your Quit kit? keep one at the house, in the car, on the job, just keep them handy and remember your fighting a WAR against NICOTINE so NEVER let your guard down not even for a moment, just stay strong and keep reaching out for help when you need it, Im here if you need me.


Shamieka

[manofsteele]

proud u r still making super decisions ..... it looks like you really want the smoke free life for yourself

u r tough and u know cigarettes make u weak ..... keep winning the daily battles

no excuses for longer successful quits

u can do it and it is worth the fight

peace

[jim_taddeo]

Sneaky little demons they are indeed. Do you think it's an addiction? LOL There is no competition here, from me, for the number of days there is only a running total of my individual healing. There may be some that do that and there may be valid reasons for it but bottom line is you reset that counter for YOU and you do this quit for YOU. Whatever it takes to stay off the killer sticks, DO IT! GREAT JOB and the honesty is a VERY GOOD sign. DO NOT JUST BLOW THIS OFF! NO LIEING TO YOURSELF! Get right back with your program as you are. I'm proud of you brother!
Jim

[robin18]

Jordan,
Do not beat yourself up!!! Put it behind you and feel good about what you have done instead of what you have not done. You did not have a cig for 9 days and that is something you should be damn proud of. I have been smoke free for 53 days and I still have cravings everyday and have to tell myself I have come to far to mess up now. It does not matter if it has been 1 day or a 1000 days each day is something to be VERY proud of. So good luck to you and we are all here for you.

Hugs, Robin

[babs77]

Jordan, you have a great attitude. and you're still determined to beat this. Those are important. You're not letting this one slip change your attitude to be "oh, well, might as well just start smoking again."

Quitting is hard work. You still have the determination to beat this thing and I know you can. You're already up to Day Three.

[miguel]

hey jordan, it takes a lot of u know what, to rat on urself like take.....lots of RESPECT FOR U BRO thats awesome.......keep it up man good job congrats on ur first 9 and ur new 2. u got quit! good luck .....whatever u do dont let ue guard down that how we get snuffed.......ltr bro ......give me a shout

[mary-pat]

I know exactly what you mean..sometimes it's just the action smoking and not the nic urge.. Good for you for throwing it out the window ..THAT is tough!

[jordan4]

Thank you very much. You and everyone else here have been SO helpful and supportive. Yall are great! When I told Hailey about what I had done she said the same hing as all of you. That it was no big deal as long as it stopped there and that when she tells her family about my quit she tells them all that its been 12 days. Not 9 and then 2.

Thanks for everyones support. Ill keep yall updated for sure.

[val_b]

that's great Jordan that you are keeping your commitment to quit. You don't want to smoke anymore and that's the real reason to value your quit. You are making a decision for the rest of your healthy and long life. Good come back. I realy have had near attempts to smoke but I would come to this site and tell my friend how hard sometime the urges to not take a puff is. And get great support, but you are doing great, now some of your friend know you smoke, let the others know so they don't offer any more smokes.