a Hard Day tomorrow....

[jan__tx]

I am on my 10th day today of not smoking and am so very proud of my quit. My dad died in August and I was the one that had to pick up his ashes from the funeral home and take home to Mom. When I put him in the car, of course I started crying and called my mom & brothers to tell them T.D. and I were coming back home...then I lit a cigarette saying to my dad " I know TD but I am going to smoke anyway!" and made it to my mom's house ok...but tomorrow when we go to the town were we are burying my dad w/my husband and preacher driving - while my mom and I are in the back seat with his ashes...I can now say Dad I finally quit! it is 11 days today Dad.
I know to some of you this sound a little creepy but I really hope I can go through this quit mainly for myself for the ones that love me!

[donna22]

Hi Jan, I don't think it's creepy, your dad would be very proud of you for finally quitting just as I'm sure your mother is...I hope tomorrow will be a peaceful day for you as you bury your father, he's not gone Jan, he will always be with you helping you stay strong...

Hugs...Donna

[pamela]

Congrats on Day 10 !!!!!!! It doesn't sound creepy at all, It is a part of life and It works for you, If it is keeping you from smoking..... Keep it up and never let your guard down!!!!

[susan52]

I was just leaving a comment and then read your blog. What a tender entry. It is important that we all remember that we are loved and that smoking is a very selfish act (as all addictions are). Thanks for sharing your pain as well as your hope. YOU CAN DO THIS!

[Giulia]

Not creepy at all. For those of us who know the weight of ashes in more ways than one, don't dwell on the box. He is free. And so are you. He would be glad for you. And smoking will not cure the pain. (Read in Relapse Traps - The Grieving Process and please add your comments there from your experience.) Don't let this de-rail your quit. OK?

[karen44]

No, not creepy for sure! I know my mom and dad are probably in total shock that I'm not smoking. I think I can actually hear them bragging to their friends about me. I'm sure of it!

[jan__tx]

thanks to all for the support - read before going to his service:) thanks

[jan__tx]

yesterday went so good....my dad would have loved seeing everyone again:) and he bought us all lunch at a local restaurant...annnnnd I was able to let him know I am not smoking:) Thanks to ev1 for the support - this site has saved me from smoking a many a cigarette:)

[Giulia]

Glad to hear it wasn't as hard as anticipated. Sort of like quitting, eh? The thought of it can be a lot worse than the actual event itself.