Yep. Blew it again!

[catfish6]

Jumping right back into it though. Smoked my last few this morning. Smoked yesterday because I was angry about my son and disappointed that my only brother doesn't even wish me a happy birthday. I try so hard to have a relationship with him even though he's in Seattle and we're in Massachusetts. He gets me mad. Angry and cravings don't work out too well for me. I have to quit. I'm in so much pain with recovering from this hip surgery, if I don't stop, my circulation isn't going to get any better and my healing will be slower. I don't want to be in pain anymore. I'm getting tired of it. They don't give out pain meds like candy like they used to!! Not that I'd want them but there's nothing that touches the pain and I hate it. I want to keep up the not smoking so I can heal:):)

[kloud9]

Anger is always going to be a part of ya life.    Does smoking have to be ?

[kloud9]

Can You Separate the two ? You  need to ! Go Bax to Start, Do not collect $200.00.

[sharon110]

Never quit quitting, you got this. 🙂

[Jaxson1-16-14]

You are right, your circulation will not improve, in fact the nicotine will continue to restrict your blood flow and you won't heal. You need to decide to do this for you. You're son will make you angry, but smoking won't make that not happen. Unfortunately smoking didn't make your brother remember your birthday...HAPPY BIRTHDAY by the way! 🙂

You need to do this for you and you alone. No one can make this decision for you Catfish,  but we can help you...you my friend need to be stronger than your excuses. The anger, the stress, the hurt, the heartache will always be there, but smoking needs to be no part of that. You need to find another way to cope, find something else to do, and distract yourself.

Please before you put that cigarette to your lips, blog HELP to us first...we will be there. You can do this, you just have to make the decision and stick to it!

[linda258]

Hi Catfish.... Think about "why" you blew it again... then read what you said.  There are no real excuses to smoke.. anger, sickness, stress etc etc even death of a loved one are not "reasons" to smoke.  Understand that you are addicted.... and your mind is looking for a good reason to say it is ok to smoke.

Being able to stop smoking is a mindset.... for me I first I had to talk the talk before I could walk the walk.  Tell yourself... yell it if you have to... that YOU WILL NOT SMOKE ONE PUFF.... there is no EXCUSE or REASON to smoke!  Also, go back and prepare... where are the smokes coming from... look for a stop smoking group .... etc. etc.

Hang in there.... YOU CAN DO THIS!

Oh, I have 3 brothers and not a one called me on my birthday even though I keep in touch with them all the time... but by not smoking over it I might get a few more birthdays to be upset with them. 

[cheyenne7]

Hi there....good to see you....

Yes, you definitely want to heal as quick as possible!!!!

I can feel exactly where you are coming from with the smoking....I spent the ENTIRE year of 2013 stopping and starting.....just to have to stop again....I feel like I wasted a lot of time....

I never prepared as well as I should/could have for my quits....I thought I did, but looking back I didn't....maybe this is the missing key for you? IDK...

I know you CAN do this, and with your hip there is no time like the present.....wishing you the best....

I often miss calling my brother on his birthday.....but I love him a lot.....and I'm sure your brother loves you.....he just has that missing calling people on their birthday sometimes gene that I have....sorry : o

[LouiseR]

Its not easy quitting but it is so doable.  Non smokers have family stresses, get angry, have surgeries and pain and they get through it all not smoking.  We smoked for years so it will take some time to unlearn thinking a smoke makes things better when in fact it causes more anxiety and is killing us.

The first couple of weeks of quitting there are alot of ups and downs but the important thing is is knowing that it does get better and you need to ride out the craves. 

Come here daily and read all the blogs and take what you feel will help in  your quit and apply it.  Blog how you are and ask for advise, help.  We are all at different points in this journey but we all want the same, to be smoke free. 

[catfish6]

Thank you so much. All of you:). Your words of encouragement mean a lot to me. Cathy:)