Lots of voices, all in my head telling me I can't do this....lot's of fear of what life will be like as a nonsmoker...feels like I am losing my best friend.
We all feel that and think that. Is your other best friend a liar, a cheater, full of poison, brainwashing you? Does your BFF tell you that you need to connect/text at least 20 or 30 times a day? Does your BFF make you sick?
There are others that will give you links to read. that will explain how you are brainwashed. WHEN...I hope it is when and not if,,,,,you quit, there wlll be a period where you will feel a little lost and empty. It is just your brain relearning freedom.
Simply it is you decide you want to quit. you realize you are willing to quit. You read and study and make a quit plan. Then you quit. when you have a bad day you turn to us. when you have a great day, you come to us and celebrate. I am only about 4+ months quit and I feel sooooo free! pull up and chair and quit with us surrounding you!
Welcome to Ex, Storybelle! The very best thing you can do is educate yourself about this addiction. The first thing I suggest you do is to read Allen Carr's book The Easy Way to Quit Smoking. Here's the link to the free, online PDF of the book --
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDJo1vfEqlo . I smoked heavily for over 50 years and reading that book completely changed how I looked at smoking and what it is and is NOT. The basic premise is that no smoker actually enjoys smoking and all we're doing is satisfying the crave we created when we smoked the last one. Therefore, quitting smoking is giving up NOTHING. Every other time I quit I felt deprived, like I was foregoing something of value. But it's not true -- there is no value to smoking. Boy, has that understanding made a difference! I am at Day 235 of my quit and I know that I will never smoke another cigarette.
Also, read everything you can find here and at sites like whyquit.com (which has a ton of really good information). Come here regularly and read the blogs, see what people are experiencing at every stage of their quit. We have people here who are planning to quit just like you are to people who've been quit for over 10 years and come back to reach out to the new people. Comment on the blogs -- you will find that when you do it benefits you as well. Write your own blog about how you're feeling about your quit.
The bottom line is that a successful quit is based on education, attitude, acceptance and determination. Education: Once you've learned the truth about this addiction it's much harder (for me impossible) to go back to smoking. Rather, it helps us unlearn the connections we had with smoking. Attitude: Your attitude or mindset is key to whether your quit feels like torture or feels like something very doable. If you feel deprived, if you feel sorry for yourself and just use willpower to get through not smoking, it will be torture (and you'll read more about that in the Carr book). But if you have that attitude that smoking is nothing and you are willing to go through the discomfort that is generally associated with quitting, then you can be a happy quitter. I am definitely a happy quitter! Acceptance: If you can accept that you will have craves early in your quit and sometimes later in your quit than you would imagine, and don't fight them but observe them and say "Yeah, I don't do that anymore" and find something else to do you won't have as many craves. It's true. Determination: This is tied up with the willingness I mentioned. You have an addict's brain, just like the rest of us. Your addict's brain will whisper to you, scream at you and plead with you to come back. There will be times when you find yourself thinking "oh, what could it hurt to have just one." That's your addiict brain trying to entice you. Determination is your ability to say NOPE -- Not One Puff Ever.
So welcome to EX -- we're a wonderfully supportive group who've been there done that or are being there doing that right now. There's no better resource than a good support group to get through the initial discomfort of quitting.
The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I also highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read.
As well, read the sections on this site, and read the blogs, responses and pages of folks you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com and quitsmokingonline.com for the good information contained there.
After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.
The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced. Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. If you smoked in the car, take a bottle of ice cold water to sip on instead.
You need to distract yourself through any craves. You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time. You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around your head alone. Get busy! Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:
The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?" Then DO it. You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.
Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!
