cancel
Showing results for 
Show  only  | Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Share your quitting journey

Tired, in pain, and so sad

elvan
Member
1 27 342

I am exhausted, my back hurts, my sciatica is relentless, and I got news that my granddaughter has been diagnosed with lupus.  She is 19, she is an athletic and beautiful young woman who is a sophomore in college.  Lupus can be devastating to organs including the heart and lungs, so far, she is experiencing fatigue and some chest pain.  She was tested three times at three different labs and the test results were positive every time.  I had to stop myself from crying at work today.  My brother in law is an ER doc in NY state and he graduated from the University of Buffalo, that is where she will be going to school.  I talked to my sister last night and asked her to please ask him if he knows anyone she can see to try to get this under control before  it manifests itself in other ways.  My heart is aching for her, she is named Ellen, just like me, she is the light of my daughter's life.  My daughter has RA, like I do.  I am saying prayers and doing as much research as I can on this horrible disease.  My daughter asked me for my recommendation for a doctor but I have not lived there in more than 22 years.  Any docs I knew have probably retired by now.  My brother in law is only five years younger than I am but he is still practicing medicine and still has connections.  Please include my darling Ellen in your prayers, let them get this under control before it does damage.  I am going to bed soon, I know it is okay to cry...as soon as I get this pain under control, I will try to sleep.

My love to all of you.

Ellen

27 Comments
YoungAtHeart
Member

I am so terribly sorry you, your daughter and namesake are having to deal with this......my heart is so hurting for you.

Try to get some rest, dear one.

Nancy

vanlil
Member

Oh Ellen I am so sorry to hear about your granddaughter's illness.  I have a very dear friend who has Lupus for many years.  Her heart and lungs are ok just pain esp. when we get storms.  She is only 46 yrs. old but is now applying for disability.  I will pray for her BIG TIME and also for you.

LIllian (vanlil)

Thomas3.20.2010

I literally have tears in my eyes, Ellen! We have lived decades, made some mistakes, and done our best to change the trajectory of our choices but your Granddaughter did nothing to bring this on herself!

Life is Precious! None of us deserve smoking related illness yet it is a consequence of decisions we would like to step back and redo. That's impossible! What we CAN and must do is make the best of Today each and every Day! We owe it to Folks like your Granddaughter to do that!

God Bless! My prayers are with all of You!

KMC56
Member

My prayers are with you and your granddaughter.

tjanddj
Member

My heart goes out to you and your granddaughter. My prayers and love. 

Giulia
Member

My elder sister had Lupus and lived with it for years and it was well managed.  Do not lost heart!  If your granddaughter is anything like her grandmother she's got some fight in her!  ♥

Showiestodin
Member

Ellen you have been hit hard today. My prayers are with you and your entire family.

Magstoyou
Member

Oh Ellen, sorry to hear that. My daughter was diagnosed with Lupus at first and then  Fibro when she was in her 30's. And now they say she has  RA. It all runs together.  She went to Drs in Seattle- Washington State. Will keep you and your granddaughter in my prayers. Try to get  some rest.

Hugs Mags 

freeneasy
Member

Sorry for your pain, emotional and physical Ellen. I can only remember one person who I knew, a neighbor about 20 years ago who had Lupus.  As I recall most of the time it seemed like she did pretty well.   Hugs ((()))

Christophina
Member

Dear Ellen

I hope that you have had a deep and peaceful sleep and feel refreshed. I pray that your pain is less today. I pray that your granddaughter's early diagnosis means that her Lupus will be well managed and that she will have a fulfilling happy life.

Christine

JonesCarpeDiem

I'm sorry to hear this.

It's so hard to figure out why these autoimmune diseases begin and how we could prevent or treat them.

They seem to be much more prevalent than they used to be.

Perhaps there will be a way to halt them in the near future that will help your granddaughter.

Hugs to you Ellen.

c2q
Member

Ellen, I am so sorry to hear about Ellen's diagnosis. She sounds like a wonderful young woman and I know that she must be very special, being your granddaughter. My heart is with you. Much love to you, your daughter and granddaughter, and all her family.

HardHead2
Member

Ellen, my prayers are with you and your granddaughter today.  You have been there for me so please know that I am there for you.

dwwms
Member

My sympathies, Ellen. It is so hard to accept when a life altering illness comes on - seemingly out of nowhere. There is no rhyme or reason to it, it just is. I pray that doctors will get it under control and she'll have many years yet ahead to live and enjoy life. Caring thoughts to you ...

Doug

MarilynH
Member

I am so very sorry to hear this Ellen, I'm sending good thoughts and prayers up for your beautiful namesake, your daughter, husband, family and friends for the best possible treatment to get the lupus under control so she can go about life without too much interference from the symptoms and prayers are going up for you too sweet elvan gentle hug. 

Jennifer-Quit
Member

So sorry Ellen - I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Diannnnn
Member

Oh Ellen, I am so sorry. However, if your namesake is anything like her Grandma, she will handle this Dx with grace, strength and determination. I know you don't want her to have to go through the pain and frustration, nobody would. I will keep your family in my prayers.

I hope you feel better this morning.

Dian

bonniebee
Member

I am so sorry Ellen for you and your Grand Daughter I don't know to much about Lupus but from the comments above it  sounds like it can be kept under control I am keeping you and yours always  in my prayers . ❤️  .

Bree19
Member

My dear Ellen

It is so difficult when these shocking, unexpected illnesses come out of nowhere. There really are no words that can help.  I'm sending out warm and comforting thoughts to you and your whole family.  You ladies are remarkably strong.  

Much love and hugs

Bree

RachelMB
Member

Sweet Ellen-

My heart aches for you and I'm sending big hugs!  My mother was diagnosed with lupus 20 years ago.  It has been well managed but it can be a difficult disease to treat-especially at the time of diagnosis.  I know exactly what it is like to watch someone suffer with this.  Please know that I am here for you and am happy to share any information I have.  Knowledge is power my sweet friend.  Remember how much we all love you and we will get through this together! xoxoxo

Rachel

constanceclum
Member

Ellen I can't tell you how sorry I am for all you have gone through and are going through this now. I pray for the best outcome possible for your granddaughter. I have known people with lupus and it seems to affect people differently. Some milder than others. Maybe she could join a support group soon and get advice on diet and exercise as well as Drs. Also natural remedies. Please keep us updated.

Love,

Connie

Christine13
Member

Ohhh Ellen, I have tears for her and for you.  I am so sad this is happening.  I will be saying deep prayers for you and your grandaughter Ellen.  You are a fighter and I bet she is too.  Hoping for the best.

Please pm me.  Didn't see this blog until after I messaged you.

Sending Love.

maryfreecig
Member

Hugs and prayers. 

Sootie
Member

I am so sorry to hear this. My prayers join everyone else at EX that this disease can be at least controlled and that your granddaughter has a continued wonderful life. It is so hard when those we love have health (or any) problems. We would  rather it be us and not them.

Take care Ellen. It IS ok to cry but not to make yourself sick over this. Your daughter (and granddaughter) will need you to be strong.

Strudel
Member

Oh no Ellen! How terrible....I am so very sorry. You and your dear granddaughter are in my prayers! I have a feeling that your daughter and granddaughter have your strength and courage - and that you will all continue to provide support for each other. Please - take care of yourself sweet Ellen.

12Finally34
Member

Thank you for sharing your life.  

You are amazing - supporting your daughter, niece,  ex newbies and taking care of yourself.

You are a winner  and I will be praying for your love ones and you.

12Finally34

elvan
Member

12Finally34‌n Thank you.

About the Author
Retired RN, worked ICU/ER developed RA in early 90's, unable to work because of brittle bones from high dose steroids. Diagnosed with COPD 5 yrs ago but sure it was there and progressing long before. Live with severe chronic pain, degenerative disc disease, had both upper lobes of my lungs removed in 2015. Struggle with shortness of breath. Work in son's cafe as a cashier 2 days a week to be around people. I am a people/animal person. Lost my home and three cats in a fire on my ten month anniversary of quitting smoking. Never thought of smoking, knew it wouldn't help anything.