Tears are okay

[Mandolinrain]

Quitting is an emotional thing. Many if us found our way through our quits early on by having the experience of so many emotions we didn't know if we were coming or going.

For me....tears were a large part of that. Mixed emotions stored my thoughts. Deep inside I WANTED DESPERATELY to be a non smoker, but I was afraid. Afraid of failure, afraid of fear...is there such a thing? Being afraid of fear itself?

Tears came unannounced over I would say the first 3 months of my quit. Just look at me wrong and I would cry. I was fragile. I was learning how to cope with life without running to smoke first. This was a key turning point for me once I understood what was happening.

Frustration during my early months was induced by anyone who criticized me, looked at me wrong...again...how do you look at someone wrong?... My perception of everything was knocked out of whack.

I learned here on this site, that I would go through many stages as I began my quit journey. Some would bring intense anger, fear, hurt, pain, tears...oh yes plenty of tears, and feelings that I would lose this battle.

ALL which I was told by the wonderful Elders of mine, were 100%normal.

While we all may focused on the same goal...'to become a non smoker and or to remain one'...all of us that began this journey before you understand...

Tears are often a part of it. They're cleansing and remind us of the direction we are in or want to be in. So accept. 

Accept that today your working through another day quit. Something may happen to bring on the tears today and if it does, remember this......

 AND

This last quote is what I did. I wrote.

God Bless you all and I hope this helps at least one person. If it does, it was worth blogging ~Missy

[Grammy25]

Thank you for sharing

[DonnaMarie]

The good news is that this does not last. If it does, talk to your doctor and see if they can help temporarily. 

[Grammy25]

Thank you for sharing

[Grammy25]

Thank you for sharing

[Grammy25]

Congratulations on day 5!

Thank you for sharing

[Grammy25]

Thank you for sharing

[Grammy25]

Thank you I will

[TBoyette]

That explains my pity party yesterday.  Glad I cried.   My biggest takeaway from your thoughts was that I have to exchange how I used to deal with things (smoking) for a “new normal” - I don’t have a replacement yet for the cigarettes yet...  I guess until I do- tears will have to suffice. 

-T

[Grammy25]

Thanks for sharing!

[Mandolinrain]

And in time you will adapt and find it, I promise....meanwhile, tears are perfectly normal. hugs

[wispanky]

I just want a cigarette ALL THE TIME. I'm on day 5 and I sleep to avoid it.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Welcome

Congrats on 5 days.

It's what we did 20 times a day.

It takes time to forget and build a new routine.

Do you want a cigarette for the nicotine? routine? both?

Using an NRT?

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/thread/6040-my-welcome-to-new-members-12-years-of-watching

[elvan]

Welcome to EX...it takes TIME to get over that mental obsession.  Sleeping is okay but it would serve you better to be on the site reading blogs and commenting and seeing what is working for others.  Quitting is not an event, it is a journey and it is one day at a time, sometimes, it is one MOMENT at a time.  My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX  planning for what to do INSTEAD of smoking really helps...identifying your triggers and being prepared for them really helps.  Education about this addiction and support from others who have been where you are will help you and your own commitment is vital to a successful quit.  YoungAtHeart‌ has a great welcome for newbies and so does JonesCarpeDiem‌...I will link HIS here.../blogs/jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007-blog/2011/06/26/what-to-expect-in-the-first-four-months and https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/thread/6040-my-welcome-to-new-members-12-years-of-watching .  I am hoping YoungAtHeart‌ will share her welcome with you.

I smoked for all of my adult life but I have been quit for over 5 years thanks to this site.

Ellen

[Grammy25]

I find that the mornings and nights are the worst; but I feel that I can’t sleep my day away so I try to get outside and do yard work. I also have my games on my phone that keep me busy; but I know how you feel!

Everyone keeps telling me it will get better

I hope so

[Grammy25]

I am using the patch. I am finding that I really don’t want a cigarette during the day; but want one first thing in the morning and before going to bed.

[Grammy25]

Thank you I found this really helpful

[wispanky]

I think all of the nicotine is out of my system now. I feel like like all I need is a steam cigarette, no nicotine, no flavor, just the inhale /exhale. Does that make sense? I went cold turkey, no drugs or NRT. 

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Cut a straw into thirds. You can inhale through that. Try to only exhale through it and you will experience what COPD feels like (Impossible to empty your lungs fully before you need another breath.) If you want to amplify that, inhale only through that straw too, then, you will understand why quitting is your best path.

[Grammy25]

Thank you for the advice 

[Bonnie]

And I've doubled up with heartache and the heartache that stabs like a knife through the chest...but I've learned, through many mentors, that emotional pain will not kill you, though it cuts both ways.  To walk (lie on your side with your arms around your belly) through it and come out the other side, with your Higher Power right there, well, that's all it takes.

[Redhead101]

I needed  that thanks for the blog,,yes I'm really into my emotions today did good for the last four days of my quit I'm on my 5th day not smoking I feel lonely,   it's hard to explain board but I'll get through it,,,, it's really funny how addiction works has so much control over someone,,,but I'll get threw another  day !

[Redhead101]

Hi I'm using the patch also ,I got me some lozenge for morning  they seem to help me first thing in morning I'm on day 5 how about you ?  

[elvan]

Redhead101‌ Crying is a release of our emotions...I thought of it as being like a valve on a pressure cooker.  I did not cry much when I was a smoker because all of my feelings were stuffed down with the nicotine.  You are doing really well, it IS going to get easier.  It takes time and there are no shortcuts.

Ellen

[Grammy25]

Thank you!! Very helpful!!

[Redhead101]

Thank you! I end up taken a walk alone then came home drink some water took a nap , 

[Grammy25]

Sounds like you are on the right track

[Barb102]

Ellen is right. It will get easier. I didn’t believe it would for me but it did. You are doing great. We are here for you. You are never alone in your quit

[Craymira]

Thanks so much for sharing this. This is so important to recognize and remember, and I really appreciate it.  I’m on my 5th day of my quit and my feelings have been all over the place. Yesterday was really hard. My fiancé is used to grounding me during panic attacks and helping me recognize my bipolar II swings before I do. So I was depressed, anxious and really frustrated not able to find solace in my art — or anything. And he reminded me that  I had just quit smoking 4 days ago, and it’s ok to be upset. And said let’s get through today and then we can worry about tomorrow. 

[elvan]

Great advice, one day at a time, sometimes, it is one FEELING at a time. It WILL get easier!

Ellen

[MichalJordan23]

So true, I am 5 days + nicotine free. For me, cold turkey was a no go. I did acupuncture laser. Helped a lot but still very difficult. You've got to really want it. There is no time for next week, a special holiday, like, or whatever,  whatever just do it. You'll be glad you did , I am.

[Fiona1wanaq113]

Thank you for sharing about the tears I also have tears I also have physical pain I think it's psychological but I'll figure it out I'll walk through the stuff I've done it before I can do it again the each time gets a little harder I just want to be done with this disappointment disappointed that I make this mistake after being a non smoker for almost 7 months almost but I appreciate all your blogging I appreciate everything you guys are helping me with and enjoy the stories live Conversations I am on my journey and I'm drinking lots of water taken the dog  Extra walks

[Wingsbluecheese]

@Mandolinrain Thank you so much for sharing this!  I'm 45 days into this and I've never felt so horrible in all my life.  I cry all the time, I can't sleep, I get panic attacks now, and my appetite has really decreased and I am no slim jim!  I have accepted that this is part of withdrawal, I did this cold turkey because I had bronchitis and then sinusitis, I was sick with those for a while and now Im sick with the withdrawal, I pray every day that things will get better.  I am protecting my quit with all my heart and soul because I want to be a non smoker so badly.  I think cold turkey only worked for me because I was so sick with bronchitis I couldn't smoke, I just kept going with the quit, I have come this far and I have to do this without caving in.  Once I get through this insomnia I will be well on the way.  People on this site have compassion and the understanding I need to get through this, I am on the site daily and try to post daily.  One day at a time.  God bless everybody on this site, we all are going through different levels of quitting nicotine but we will make it through one day at a time!

God Bless,

Inesa Wingsbluecheese 

[coffmanphillip]

I love this, it is a great reminder that tears don't make us weak, they help us heal.

[Kimshine]

I can so much relate with my currently swollen eyes and stopped up nose.

It'll pass! 

[Wingsbluecheese]

@Kimshine Good morning Kim,

I have been stuffed up for weeks now after quitting, my sleep study results should be in by EOW.  I had stuffiness before but never this bad, been using saline and neti pot but OMG, how long does this last do you know?

Any help will greatly be appreciated!

Hugs,

Inesa

[Kimshine]

@Wingsbluecheese  

Good morning! I haven't experienced any sinus issues due to quitting. I had sinus issues yesterday due to a tearful day.

I hope you get relief soon!

[coffmanphillip]

@Wingsbluecheese 

Hey, I just got back from the ENT, he said my nose was dry and to irrigate it  3 times a day, said it was normal this time of year in Nebraska because everyone has their heat on and it's dry.  he seemed to blame all my sinus issues on a dry nose.  As for the ringing in the ears he said there isn't much you can do for it and you have to live with it...  How come all it feels like all doctors do is give lame diagnosis/excuses and then take your money?

[Wingsbluecheese]

@coffmanphillip Hi there,

Are you using a neti pot for irrigation or just saline??  I use them both saline more than neti pot though, I only use the neti pot on occasion maybe I should start doing this 3 times a day!  I will try anything at this point.  Let me know what your using. 

I agree doctors just don't get it, I have spent probably 1700.00 now trying to get better, it's just not working.

Thanks for advice!

Wingsbluecheese (Inesa)

[coffmanphillip]

@Wingsbluecheese 

I'm using a saline irrigation just a bottle that i stick in my nose but I would try 2-3 times a day for yourself and see if that helps, if your issues are due to a dry nose. 

[Wingsbluecheese]

@coffmanphillip Thank you!  I do have dry nose, but its also other crap too, I have a deviated septum and I now have to get a CPAP machine, sucks but....at least I will be able to sleep once I get it!  I hope you get some relief soon, keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

God Bless,

Inesa

[coyaj]

Hi, I’m 5 days into my quit and I can say I’ve cried days 2- 4 so far.. A couple of times I cries because I quit and my emotions were all over the place.. 

Thanks for the post. 

peace & love

[JACKIE1-25-15]

@coyaj Welcome to EX you are in the right place for sup[ort

[Lindarivera]

Day 4 

woke up anxious ! Still anxious several hours later. I’m grumpy! Starting to get those thoughts - just go buy a pack. I won’t today

[Barbscloud]

@Lindarivera Glad your rode out those withdrawal symptoms.  They can be tough early on.  Congrats on staying strong and sticking to your commitment. 

If you feel like you need Help, please create a post saying Help. More people will see it there.

Good job!

Barb

[Christine13]

Tear can be a blessing.  I was quite emotional after I quit smoking and drinking, but I reminded myself that patience was necessary.

I am now almost 9 months free of alcohol and cigarettes, and everything in my whole life is better.

Good work on 5 days.  Keep going.  Deep Breathe, drink water,

discuss and delay.

Christine

[pamigirl126]

Thank u for really getting right to the point.  Doing gum, patches, some support. Just when I think I'm ok. I slip. I can't. I have had radiation from March to April 15. I gotta quit. A drag here n there is not good. I'm gonna chew my gum and wear my patch. Thank you again. N yes I sob . Silly right. Stay well

[Kimshine]

@pamigirl126 A drag here and there is  not good when you quit. Get rid of all cigarettes. Soak them with water and don't keep them around. If you have them around, I question how committed you are to quitting. If I don't want to eat cake, I don't bake one. If you have cigarettes around, it's not a slip, it's a choice.

Cry, scream do whatever you have to do to stay quit. I bet have cried more tears since November than anyone here and I have been more sad than I can ever remember. It is extremely uncomfortable to rid yourself of a nicotine addiction but if you keep dragging them, you're not going to squash your addiction. The only way to quit is to never smoke them, EVER!

You can do it. It sucks for all of us.

[Jude3341]

I haven't quit yet but reading to this I sad encouraging and scary. 

[deedeepurple]

@Mandolinrain @Thank you so much. This was very inspirational.  I found myself shedding tears to God to surrender. Can’t do it my by myself.

Dee

[Quittime613]

@Mandolinrain 
Thank you! I needed to hear this I am on day 5 of no cigarettes and I am feeling a whirlwind of emotions. Yesterday I awoke from a dream about smoking and was depressed all day, cried a couple of times at my desk. Today I was angry all day, but I know this will pass. This is the first time in 30 years that I have gone 5 days without cigarettes. Thank you for sharing your experience & strength!