We are starting to have really warm weather and I found myself sitting on my patio last night remembering all the times I would smoke out there and not really having a strong physical craving but wondering if maybe I could smoke again “someday” and just smoke a little. I’m on day 58 and I know that I am in no man’s land until day 130 or so, but I was still surprised by this thought because I have been feeling so over smoking and even a little judgmental instead of jealous of people I see smoking in my day to day. I read my journal from my last night of smoking and my reasons for quitting which includes notes from my previous relapses and then went for a walk and it snapped me out of it. Here I am the next day, grateful to still be quit. It has also been very key for me to not think about the future and remind myself that all I have to do is not smoke TODAY.
