SAD

[Lovemy2boys]

I am a smoker.  I have smoked since I was 12 years old I am now 40. I have been smoking for 28 years.  I have a 16 year old and a 4 year.  The only I  time in my life I did not smoke is while I was pregnant.  I just found out that my 16 year old is smoking cigarettes.  It breaks my heart.  It is really time for me to quit smoking!!!!!!!!!!

[Tabbiekat]

I am so sorry. Just having quit myself not sure how much weight this will hold, but maybe make a pack with your 16 year old for the both of you to quit smoking? If nothing else, reach the point where you quit and seeing you quit may help your 16 year old see the changes in you and quit smoking him/her self.

[bonniebee]

I always feel bad for my influence on my children all of them have smoked but my daughter quit 15 years ago and she inspired me to quit but I still smoked for years. My sons still smoke and i hope they quit before they suffer the  consequences.  I am so glad to finally be free ! Quitting will help you feel better about yourself and may inspire your son to quit. we can't do anything about our past mistakes but we can change today ! One day at a time ! 

[YoungAtHeart]

Welcome to our community!

My eldest daughter also smokes - nothing I can do about it now.  Being an example by quitting now is the BEST thing you can do!

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. Here is a link to a free PDF version of it:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmokingonline.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises suggested in My Quit Plan http://www.becomeanex.org/my-quit-plan.php

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort.  I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

[Barbara145]

I don't think it is a coincidence.  One year after I quit smoking, my son stopped drinking.  They watch what we do.  You can do this.

[OldBones-Larry]

Welcome to our little corner of the web.

You have come to the right place to quit. You will find lots of support, links to reading, and maybe some hard love when that is needed.

Take it one step at a time.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master

[elvan]

Two of my three kids smoked...one has quit, the other still smokes.  I did not smoke when I was pregnant either.  I am so glad my oldest quit, I am "working on" my middle child to recognize how bad smoking is for him, he has asthma and it's CRAZY that he smokes.  You can quit here because you will get all of the education and support you can ask for.  This is an amazing community and I could NEVER have gotten to this point in my quit (3 years and 9+months) without the support from this site and the amazing people here.  Stay close, read blogs, comment, ask for help and advice and then LISTEN to it...your recovery needs to be one day at a time, one step at a time.

Welcome to EX Lovemy2boys  glad you are here.

Ellen

[Lovemy2boys]

Thank you, this sounds like an excellent idea.

[Lovemy2boys]

Thank you  

[Lovemy2boys]

Thank you Larry, I really think this will be useful for me as a lot of my family members smoke.

[Lovemy2boys]

Thank you Ellen,  Congratulations on the 3 years and 9 months.  I am very hopeful

[Giulia]

Guess it's time to get pregnant again!   (just kidding, of course)  If you could quit for 9 months two times, you can do it again.  If it helps, think of it in the same way you did back then.  You did it mostly for the benefit of the life growing in you, right?  Well, you have a life growing in you now.  It's YOUR life.  Your children need you and love you just as you do them, and did when they were in the womb.  

But you really have to do this for YOU.  Ultimately we have to be self-disciplined for ourselves, not for someone else, in order for the discipline to last.  Yes, it IS time to quit for good.  For you. 

Chin up.  I see quitting as a skill that can be learned.  Just like any skill.  It takes motivation, study, application, dedication and perseverance.  We know you can quit.  Now all you have to do is believe it yourself and go for it!

[Lovemy2boys]

WOW!  Thank you. Your post made cry and think..... I am worth it!  

[Giulia]

You most definitely ARE worth it.  And setting an example is a wonderful and most subtle way to get someone to quit (re your 16 year old.)  Badgering doesn't work too well.  (I speak from my own experience.)