Well, here we go again. Somehow I have managed to pick back up the habit (maybe I should be noticing a pattern here, as everytime I go home to visit family and friends or have a smoker visitor, it starts back up again, hindsight it 20/20.) Somehow, slowly I got back into it. You all probably know the same familiar tune. Start by having a few when boozing, then bum a few from my cousin, Dan. Then, tell my husband I am going to stop but keep sneaking them behind his back. UGH. Then we are onto full blown smoking. Making excuses. Staying up late at night, panicking, worrying that I will or won't be able to quit tomorrow. So today the excuse was, I left my house without my ID, so I can*t buy patches, which I was going to use briefely (7mg,) for like two weeks. I figured that would be effective and help me get over the hump. One thing about me: when I put that patch on, I will not smoke. Even after removing it, because I am so frightened of the reaction my body will have. Anyways, I am resetting my quit clock for tomorrow. I am going to possibly purchase some patches this evening, maybe I will try cold turkey (doubt it,) and ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. Please be kind in the comments, I could really use some encouragement, not judgement. Wish me luck 😞 (still not very hopeful since I am starting to feel like a total reject.)
