OUT OF THE BLUE

[Sootie]

I haven't felt inspired to blog in quite some time.......I guess I used up all I had to say in my first 10 years of quitting.

But today, I had a "feeling" and I wanted to share it. I hope you all understand where I am coming from.

We have lots of back roads in Northeastern PA and I love driving them......ESPECIALLY if they are really winding and ESPECIALLY when the trees have turned such gorgeous colors that you just can't believe your eyes. This has always been something I love to do...drive the curves on an Autumn day with the music blasting,  with a hot cup of coffee AND A CIGARETTE.  

Today-----for some reason----that thought hit me again, out of the blue, while driving the road. 

I wanted to blog about it to try to explain to new quitters that this DOES NOT MEAN that after 10 (almost 11) years of quitting I "want" a cigarette. I know when I first quit, I was worried that for the rest of my life, I would always want a cigarette. This isn't what happens......but at the time, it's hard to believe.

Today, when I thought about smoking a cigarette as I was driving, it was like a fleeting thought....just a flashback memory. I didn't need to avoid convenient stores.......I didn't need to find something else to do.....I wasn't going to smoke.

The way I think of cigarettes now is in a kind of dis-belief like......REALLY? Did I REALLY do that and for so long? WOW.

And guess what---10 years later I am still driving winding roads in Autumn  with a coffee from Dunkin and the music blasting. And I enjoy it just as much without a cigarette....................no, I enjoy it MORE!

Stay Strong.

[sweetplt]

Hi Sootie .... miss your posts...I can picture those winding roads, but Yum, love that Dunkin Donuts coffee...I bet the colors were beautiful today...Hope all is well in your world....~ Colleen 691 DOF 

[Jennifer-Quit]

Yes it is so nice to get to this point in our quits - really feels like autumn here today. And it is so much more enjoyable without a cigarette.  I can almost smell your coffee - may just have to have an evening cup! Nice to hear from you!

[nevergiveup]

Thank you for sharing. Happy for you that it was nothing more than a fleeting thought. PA sure has been beautiful lately even on somewhat gray days like today.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

It's a long and winding road

yeah yeah yeah yeah

[Giulia]

Great point, Sootie.

Today, when I thought about smoking a cigarette as I was driving, it was like a fleeting thought....just a flashback memory. I didn't need to avoid convenient stores.......I didn't need to find something else to do.....I wasn't going to smoke.

For me there are also momentary cravings.  I know, you referred to it as a "fleeting thought," that you didn't "want" a cigarette."   For me I WANT that cigarette in that moment, BUT it's a fleeting moment because I make it a fleeting thought.  I don't dwell on it.   Perhaps it's just in our descriptions that make it different.  However we perceive it, we aren't going to smoke because of it.  We don't need to avoid those convenience stores any more, but I gotta say sometimes I need to find something else to do when the reward cigarette trigger hits me.  And that's just me.  Even after 14 years.  And because of that, I need to watch my back.

[indingrl]

 Sootie and what a wonderful share and OH the driving and music and colors of the trees and winding ROADS - thanks I will get out and GO for a lovely drive TODAY and ACCEPT as a recovering nicotine addict some WEEDS of yesterday TRY to seed their way into MY just for TODAY thought life and I spray n.o.p.e. all over MY weed seed thinking just for TODAY - n.o.p.e. and n.o.p.e with YOU - I love you MY friend

[MarilynH]

Excellent point from an Exceptional fellow EXer and most definetly EXtended family, it's really good to see you Sootie....

[meWisconsin]

Glad those "smoking" thoughts are just fleeting moments. I think we all have them from time to time. I know I do. I would never return to smoking because it would never be the same as it was 6 years ago. Those days are gone.

Terry

[Cousin-Itt]

I can imagine the feeling of the winding roads bright fall colors, freshness of the fall air, and good music. Joyce and I would always take a trip to the Appalachian Mountains in the fall   

This year we decided to stay home due to Covid  All was not lost as we did enjoy the parks and fall colors around us 

I'm glad you mentioned the "Fleeting Thought"  as it's a great reminder that it's just a normal memory and nothing else

Enjoy the colors

[AnnetteMM]

Hi there, it's good to see you. 

Man, those memories are so much a part of us, aren't they?

I struggle with wanting to honor the memory vs. acting on it. Okay, it's really not a struggle, but it is a thought process.

I go through the whole thing in my head...buying a pack, and a lighter, and feeling that catch in my throat and the cough that follows, losing the great smell of my hair. NOPE, not worth it

But the memories can be sweet just the same.

[redpepper]

Hi #sootie This blog post means a whole lot to me. Wow. I too am a back road drivin', crankin' it up kinda gal. And even just these past few days running errands in town I've worried--yes worried---how will I ever take a road trip again without smoking? Will I be able to turn up my jams and be free of the longing?  (And even this in the last few days I am scared to get into the car and go anywhere.) 

Thank you so much for your blog post. You really, truly helped me a lot.

And Thank You For Not Smoking.  

redpepper

[Strudel]

Great blog Sootie! (I love what Redpepper wrote above!) 

[Sootie]

Giulia‌ No matter WHAT we call it or how far we get in our quits.......we should ALWAYS "watch our backs". Words of wisdom...............

[Sootie]

redpepper‌ Well thank you so very much for your comment! Always good to know our rambling thoughts may give a small bit of help to someone. Stay Strong because believe me.......it's worth it. And the drive, the music and the colors get better and better.

Welcome to EX!!

[Sootie]

[Sootie]

nevergiveup‌ Do you live in PA? What part?

[nevergiveup]

The Williamsport area.

[Sootie]

WOW! you are very close to me.....I live in the Poconos. The colors ARE unbelievably beautiful this Autumn aren't they??