Need advice

[avonly]

My son and husband are quitting when I do; however, neither of them are using in aids in quitting, they just think they can quit.  Any advice would be helpful.  It will make it easier for me if they quit too, since they both would be smoking around me.  My son said he would do anything to help me quit so I will live longer.  I have encouraged both of them to check out this web site, but I have not been successful.  My quit date is three days away.  I have my patches and gum and have read exactly how to use them.  I am continually telling myself that I am looking forward to being free from the bondage of smoking!

[TerrieQuit]

Hello, I can tell you that everyone's quit is very different! I could not have quit without this site, I was here 24/7 for a very long time. I am still here quite a bit. It helps me stay quit and helps others at the same time!

On the other hand, my BF Brandy quit 6 months behind me and would not sign up for EX. I felt he should, I was even upset with him about it at one point. I just had to step back! His quit, his choice. His quit was very different than mine. If he struggled as much as I did, he kept it to himself, not me, I was ready to scratch everyone's face off.

Maybe they can quit without help, My Dad did, Brandy did. The good thing is if they do end up needing us we will be here! Right now, do what you need to do to start your quit in 3 days! We are here for you!

I Won't Quit on my Quit!

[Thomas3.20.2010]

Great preparations1 Leave your family to their own devices. When they come to you - tell them what worked for you but don't push! As important as this is to you - they have to find their own way through - and they will!

I never said a word to my Son and he quit for life 4 Months after I did simply because of the EXample I set. 

By the way most successful quits are cold turkey so stop worrying!

I wish you the very BEST! Stick with us and we'll help you get there!

[avonly]

I am glad to hear that many people quit cold turkey, I don't think I could.  Appreciate everyone's support.  I am reading, reading, reading!

[Giulia]

Sure it's easier when the people around you don't smoke, but that's a best case scenario and doesn't always happen.  So you have to recognize that whether they manage to quit or not has nothing to do with YOUR quit.  If they DO quit, then you can all feed off of each other's success.  If they don't, you can always come here and feed off of other's success here. 

The scientific/medical community believe that NRT's combined with education and support create the greatest success rates.  My husband and I both quit cold turkey.  What made THE difference for me was having a support community to come to and the education I received there.  You may notice that the majority of people who show themselves in this community are women.  I think the majority male psychology of not asking for directions while driving holds true for not asking for directions/help while traveling on the quit journey too.  (MOO - my opinion only!)

Don't worry about THEIR quit - focus on YOURS.  And definitely keep reading.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

"I don't think I could"

[JonesCarpeDiem]

I didn't think I could either. I used 10 patches my first 11 days. I forgot to put one on on friday (my 4th day) New I needed it Saturday and after forgetting to put one on for 2 days the second week, I realized there was no reason to continue. I LISTENED TO MY BODY.

I did keep one in my wallet my first year with a promise to myself I would put it on and wait 45 minutes rather than smoke.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

There are people here who haven't smoked in 1000 days but are still using nicotine. So, to each his own.

[LouiseR]

Welcome and keep on doing all the reading you can.  Come here every day and blog too and keep us updated and ask for help and advice.  This is a wonderful community!

[YoungAtHeart]

Welcome to our community!

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. Here is a link to a free PDF version of it:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

As well, read the sections on this site, and read the blogs, responses and pages of folks you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com and quitsmokingonline.com for the good information contained there. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises suggested on this site

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around your head alone.  Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

[avonly]

I have read this book and also his book The Easy Way for Women to quit smoking.  I own both and they are good.  However, I am not sure he is right about quit aids not being necessary, and that it is easy to quit.  Thanks for the advice though.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

What do NRT's do?

They give you nicotine. They do not interrupt the ingrained routine of smoking. They do not make you think of smoking any less.

They can tke the edge off while you learn you don't need to smoke just because you think you do.

that is all they can do.

[avonly]

Good Point!

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Please don't pop a piece of gum every time you think of smoking. If you get into that routine, you never break the association of the urge to smoke.

The strength of the patch should be based upon how many cigarettes you were smoking at the time you quit.

a 21mg patch is equal to what you would actually receive from a pack of cigarettes.

A 14mg patch is equal to 14 cigarettes

a 7mg patch is equal to 7 cigarettes.

a 2mg piece of gum is equal to two cigarettes

a 4mg piece of gum is equal to 4 cigarettes.

If you are on the patch and using gum, you may be getting much more nicotine than when you smoked which only deepens your physical need for more nicotine.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

It's a choice. You can either use the NRT's or they can use you.

Just be aware.

[avonly]

I have wondered about that, thanks for the info!