I really and truly cannot believe I have made it this far especially with what has been going on with my Mom for the last month. My Mom was diagnosed with Parkinsons a few months ago, she was still able to walk, talk, dress herself and shower. I never realized how fast Parkinsons can take hold of someone, the last two weeks the parkinsons has really taken a toll on my Mom. For the last two days she has been so much worse to the point I have been up most of the night with her as she has been hallucinating, she can hardly get in and out of bed or the car, dressed, lost interest in eating, showering and cannot walk very well. After being up with her all night last night I finally checked her into the hospital were she was diagnosed with advanced Parkinsons. After her stay in the hospital the most painful thing will be putting her in long term home care and I feel so damn sad that she can't come back to her home. She seems to come and go out of the hallucinations, she now has to be fed and bathed and dressed. I swear this is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through in my entire life and I didn't smoke, I thought about it, but for some reason it just rolled off. I really thought about it though thinking that since this is a very diffficult time in my life I could probably smoke for now and then quit again later but I never even thought about or looked at a liquor store on the way home. Maybe I am just to exhausted, I don't know. But I tend to think that no matter what difficulties happen in my life now, I choose not to smoke! There is one other reason, I have told myself several times I need to set an example for my children and grandchildren. My oldest daughter and youngest son quit smoking and my middle daugther isn't smoking as she is pregnant and I hope to God she stays quit after the baby and have a funny feeling she will stay quit.
I again thank God for leading me to this site and to all of you who have helped make it possible for me to quit. 89 days and I plan to go the whole way and after 45 years of smoking that is N.O.P.E.
God bless all of you and always protect your quit.
