I had been a smoker for 36 years 1-2 packs a day. I got sober in 1992 after losing several family members and friends to illness, accidents, etc. 10 years ago I fell out of a deer stand while hunting and shattered my left hip,leg, and arm. I had to crawl for 16 hours during the night and it was freezing rain the entire time. I prayed to God to please let me live I was only 41 years old and I had a lot of things I still wanted to see and do. One promise I made to God that night was to return to my Catholic roots and attend and practice my religion. When I was found the following morning my body temp was 87, yes I said 87, I had crawled over 3/4 mile to get help. I have undergone two surgeries to repair the damage and as soon as I was able was wheeling the wheelchair out for a smoke. The surgeon begged me to quit so that the bones would heal better but the slave of nicotine had me better. For in my head it helped me deal with the constant pain. In between physical rehabs I tended to my mother who was dying of bladder cancer, a direct result of her drinking and smoking. When she passed on I rationalized that at least I didn't drink and thus escaped her tortuous fate. Time goes by and I begin to have some troubles requiring a hysterectomy. This was botched so badly I was left with a catheter for 2 months until they did another repair that subsequently got infected. I was literally dying again. I traveled out of Texas to Cincinatti to have a skilled surgeon put me back together again. Each time I left the hospital I could not wait for my nicotine fix. I deserved it after all I had been through. Many of the doctors offered me patches, gum, etc to get me off but I had failed on those before and thought it was wasting my time. Finally last year mortality hit me in the face again with the death of yet another family member. I promised my husband I would quit first of the year. All through Nov/Dec he was telling everyone how miserable he would be with my evil nonsmoking twin. I too was prepared for this she-devil to come out. I still suffer daily pain from my injuries and must walk with the assistance of a cane, but I am so grateful to be alive. Then I came here and read and read and read and signed on, responded and read some more. Every story has touched me and made me realize that this has got to be the easiest thing I have ever done in my life. No one or No thing can ever make me take another puff again. Prayer, support here and in the real world are my greatest allies. God Be With All of You on this Wonderful Beautiful Journey of Being an EX.
