Making the mental turn

[Roark]

There was nothing easy about the first 40 or so days of quitting, but it was all doable.  I've done it before and have had success.  I knew I could do it again.

But now I'm back where I was before and this time I'm hanging in there, mostly from just sheer stubborn.  My real challenge is the same as it has always been:  I haven't been able to make that mental turn from missing cigarettes to hating cigarettes and being glad I'm quit.  I have bought into that being the key to making it into a long term quit and I've had a few days where I've been there, but it seems like I always slide back into that mild longing and secretly thinking about rewarding myself for quitting smoking by smoking. 

And then just getting mad at myself.

I'm not really worried about giving in and smoking this time.  I've done the "only one" thing before and know it doesn't work.  I can stay quit.

But I want to be happy quit.  And right now I just can't quite make that leap.

[Daniela2016]

We had some happy quitters here; as for me, at a little over 30 days, I was crying my heart out.  Then this place was recommended to me by the medical insurance company I called for support.

And my world of quitting changed drastically.

Patches helped for a couple of weeks, they took the edge off; the hand to mouth was more complex though, I kept smoking an e-cigarette here and there, then I swapped for the vaping device, decreasing the level of nicotine with the intent to keep "smoking" the nicotine free juice.  All that in the first month.

Once I joined here, there was no hiding anymore, I had to face the addiction, I read about it, listen to advice, and stopped vaping in the first week of joining.

You've been through the hardest part of the quit, but it might take a while to be a happy quitter, but you can be one, if you say so!  Here is to help you set your expectations /blogs/jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007-blog/2011/06/26/what-to-expect-in-the-first-four-months , the blog is by one of our longtime elders, he knows what he is talking about.

Please remember, quitting is not easy, but it is just as easy as you can make your mind up to be.

You have the power over it, use it!

Welcome, you made a great decision, please read, ask questions, you can do it!

[Mandolinrain]

I think for me, making it a happy quit came down to deciding I was making a real commitment to better myself and my health....for me first, then my husband and family - grandkids and friends. I will live longer.

I think...no, I know....I became so determined to finish what I started to commit to and by finish I mean devote myself to my quit. No more bad choices or failure in that regard.

I knew , as I do now....that life will happen. I will have good days and bad days. Me smoking won't change life. It will however, shorten my life.

Welcome to Ex. Glad your among us. Sending you the best for a good solid FINAL quit. You can do this and we have your back . Take what you need and leave the rest, someone will always take your leftovers.

Again, welcome ~Missy

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Maybe this will help from our leader Thomas3.20.2010‌How I Became a "Happy Quitter!" and he has a few more on the topic.  Bottom line is it is a choice to be happy. 

[PrimeNumberJD]

This may seem obvious, but maybe it'll help you out; you cannot be a happy quitter if you are not a quitter! If you're planning on being a quitter, you might as well be happy about it. 

The difference between a feeling and a mood is length of time. A feeling is instantaneous, automatic; you don't get to choose your feelings in the moment. Mood is the lasting effect of feelings, you can frame and change these. Hunt the good stuff!

You don't have to hate something to be happy. In fact, if you think about that, it is somewhat backwards. Hunt the good stuff, what are you happy with about your quit? Great job on your quit! 

[sweetplt]

Hi and Welcome to Ex’s Roark 

Glad you made the decision to quit smoking...now it is time to forget about the past quits and the future ones...and think about this one being the best quit...Be sure to read at My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX ... also go up on the top of page and when you see the magnifying glass click on it and type in No Man’s Land...this happens during the quit between 30 to 130 days...well worth the read...get in there and realize why this is your last quit...hang tough ... at about 100 days quit...I just knew ... I liked this life better than as a an addict...maybe it is time to learn a new task...something you always wanted to do...to divert your thoughts from quitting etc., ... keep close to here and encourage others that helps with our own quits as well as others...Breath and have a Happy Friday ~ Colleen 270 DOF 

[Roark]

Thanks all.  Pushing through and finding some points of pleasure along the way.

The blog post about living your future now and smoking having no place in it was a great place to start. I had seen the others before (and they are always helpful) but it seems like finding a new angle on this quitting process to think about things from has a way of making today work.

Today marks six weeks and for the first time ever I can honestly say that I feel both desires:  I want a cigarette but I also want to stay quit.  And the latter is winning over and over, for the first time.  And that makes me want more of it.

[Mandolinrain]

I'd say your gonna do just fine

[PrimeNumberJD]

Today marks six weeks and for the first time ever I can honestly say that I feel both desires:  I want a cigarette but I also want to stay quit.  And the latter is winning over and over, for the first time.  And that makes me want more of it.

There it is, hunting the good stuff, you get more of it! If you want more if it, and you get more of it, you will find a path to being a happy Sexy Exer!