Hello everyone!
Tomorrow we have plans to go to my fiancés parents house for Christmas. For personal reasons, this event is going to be really stressful for me. It’s unfortunately one of the biggest events of the year for the family and I’ve gone for the past 2 years, so it’s somewhat of a tradition. They also made the trip out to our place for thanksgiving, so I feel even more obligated to go. I tried to let some members know that I have stopped vaping and to set some boundaries, and for most of them they were kind and respectful and supportive. However, a particular family member actually cut us off mid sentence and told us that their party of people they’d be bringing & themselves would not stop vaping, and refused to even hear my reasonings or my reasonable expectations. I wouldnt ask someone to completely stop around me, just cutting back would be an extreme help, but I wasn’t even able to get to that point without being shot down. Even more stressful is that they have to come pick us up as our car is broken down and my fiancés family has already paid them to come pick us up. I will be in the car with them for a minimum of 3 hours (there and back with no stops) with no way of separating myself from triggers and taking a breath, as they informed us that they would not stop vaping in the car. I am worried about attending now, as I am very early in my quit journey and have still been dealing with intense and frequent cravings. I’m worried about a relapse, or about my mood being unpredictable due to the cravings and added stress of holidays and new people and not being able to drive ourselves. My fiancé has no choice but to go, since they’ve already confirmed details with the family earlier today. So I am asking you guys for some advice. Would sitting this year out would help me in the long run, despite missing out and having to spend the holidays at home by myself? Or should I try to go anyway and expose myself to triggers for the sake of the family event? Any advice would be very appreciated. I am worried about letting them down, or about them holding resentment toward me for skipping out due to the actions of one person. But I also want to take care of myself and give myself the best ways to quit and stay focused on that objective. Thank you guys so much.
