Listening to EX, Protecting the Early Stages of a Quit, Unexpected things

[sam354]

Hi All, 

My quit date Aug 7th has come and gone and I'm still smoking.  I had a very bad, very unexpected, very personal and difficult situation crop up last week that wiped me out.  I am in the midst of major life change and I knew this when I set the date originally (not the bad thing, but the major change).  I didn't want to listen to EX when it recommended a much later date because of the major life change- and I still don't.  Now it recommends Oct 1st.  I set it for Aug 31st when I will be newly ensconced after a 3/4th journey drive across U.S.A. in my new city and with a supportive family again.  Should I listen to EX?  I don't want to wait that long.  I thought that I knew all the pitfalls coming up- even listed them and reviewed them in my journal and then this unexpected, very bad, very personal situation happened (I'm okay but was very very unnerved for a week).  I do know I won't give up, and will shoot for 31st- I don't want to make any more excuses.  

Warm wishes to all of you out there- warmest to the first few dayers (I'm praying for you all) and a special hug to those long quitters who are examples for the rest of us.  Be well and be safe.

[oharalane]

I'm only 7 days old as a non smoker so I'm probably not the one to give you advise on setting your quit date.  I'm sure the Experts will advise you well.  Just wanted to wish you well on your journey, thank you for the prayers and let know you will be in my prayers as well.

[Patty-cake]

Hi Sam,

You shouldn't try to quit while there are major problems going on in your life. You would be setting yourself up to fail.

On the other hand, there will always be challenges in life and you don't want to use those as excuses not to quit.

Only you know for sure all of the extenuating circumstances that surround your life. When you do decide, we will be there to support you.

[ryan44]

Good for you  on deciding to quit on Aug. 31. Sounds like that will be a good time. I think once you do quit and after the first few weeks you will notice a new calmness come over you. You will learn over time that those sickerettes were not really calming you down but making you more stressed. Also quitting gives you a great sense of accomplishment.  Your self confidence will soar. You will  feel like if you could quit them you can do anything.  Committ to quit no matter what on Aug. 31. Don't let anything stop you. You can do this.

[mzmelanie]

You can do it! Have faith and be strong!

[nick55]

Just an observation I have made of myself ... I find I have to consciously slow down and make myself take things easy when I have quiet times ... if I do this cigarettes are not on my mind but if I am agitated during my quiet times when I am not doing so much it is horrible.

I think you will know when the time is right to quit, be frank with yourself and get a time when you will have the support and also things to occupy your time for a while until you can relax into it and hopefully start to enjoy the quit. 

[jojo_2-24-11]

We can never plan for unexpected things to come up. Get yourself set up for triggers, urges, craves. Get a plan for when lifes unexpected things come up. Try and put yourself in that frame of mind and see what your responses are. Then you are better equipped with the tools to help you through these times. Life is always going to have unexpected things pop up, it's up to you on how they are handled.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Listen, I've been quit for 5 years and 8 months and they would tell me to wait 3 months if they knew what I was going through. My opinion of this sites 2 month minimum quit wait is that, I would forget I wanted to quit smoking if I had to wait 2 or more months to begin quitting. .

My opinion is if you've never tried to quit before, a month is the perfect amount of time to prepare and learn what drives your smoking habit besides nicotine. If you already know the drill and choose to put it off and keep smoking, I believe you are weakening your resolve with each week that passes and pacifying yourself so you don't have to deal with life.

What happens 3 months from now if someone close to you gets in a bad car accident or your best friend dies? Is it right back to smoking? Do you delay another 6 months because the timing isn't right?

Life doesn't wait for you to quit.

[stonecipher]

I agree with Dale.  A month is a good amount of time to get ready.

If I had known back in the beginnng of May that in June my husband would have to have surgery for (previously undiagnosed) heart disease and that in July my dad would get diagnosed with cancer, I might have been tempted to "put off quitting" until the autumn.  But, that is what I have been doing my whole life, putting it off for a "better time".

  I quit cold turkey May 8 and I am pleased that I have not smoked since.  The hardships are still hard, but I think I am doing better at dealing with them as a nonsmoker than I would if I were still smoking.

Other challenges in my life as well have put this summer very definitely into the "Not stellar" category.  Even so, it has been a good summer for me because of quitting cigarettes.  If that's one of the only good things of the past 3 months, it is a very BIG good thing.