Let it be

[sarai2]

My son came over.  This is the same one  who told me off in a public restaurant.  He visited and took some area rugs that I gave him a week ago.  Part of me wanted to bring up the restaurant incident.  I wanted him to realize how much he hurt me.  I wanted an apology.  I hesitated and didn't bring it up.  I thought about it and decided that he may never truely appreciate me or respect me for what ever reason.  I cannot allow him to dictate how I feel about myself.  I cooked some breakfast and we sat together at the table.  Before he left, he said he loved me and kissed me on the forehead.  I believe this was his way of apologizing.

"I love you too son."

[iriseyes]

i think we may have the same son 🙂

[MarcieWhosoever]

thats really nice sarai, im sure that was his way. Ever since you got up and walked out of that resturaunt he has been thinking about it and feeling bad. I have 3 boys, they are young still. very loving, but one, my oldest is like a grumpy old man sometimes. We tell him he has more rules than us. He is the type that is never wrong and getting an apology out of him is like pulling teeth. sigh..... kids!

I dont know what planet he came from.

Hang in there, it sounds like he really is sorry .

[jawidge]

I have one of "those kids" who is 20 years old, and it is so difficult.  Sometimes I can hold it back but sometimes I cannot.  He was going off about something the other day and I told him he needed to quit acting like a " little princess".  That did not help things very much ..LOL  Then later there was the 20 minute phone call between us where we made our effort to patch things up. I have two older kids that never , ever said the kind of things this one does, and I do not think I will every understand it.  I honestly made the best effort to parent them all the same way. It is confusing.   It's funny, Marcie's is her oldest and mine is our youngest.  Rose Kenendy said it best.  " I love all my kids, but sometimes I don't like them so much."   Good for you for using restraint.  I will try to do better myself. Depsite how I feel, there is no benefit for me to escalate these episodes.   

[Strudel]

It does sound like that he was at least trying to apologize....... I love what you said about not letting him dictate how you feel about you! Great job on continuing to protect your quit!

[Julia_Amy]

I'm really happy to hear this post-script!  You must be really happy. Maybe when the dust settles it could be helpful to readdress not the issues necessarily (at first) but that there should be some ground rules...no name calling, no "nevers: or "always" no public humiliation....Funny how sometimes getting to the issues are more problematic than the issues themselves!  I need to remember that I am not faultless and conceed sometimes...helps the give and take amazingly, don't you think?  I think you shoud be proud of yourself for how you conducted yourself in the restaurant and when he came for the rugs!  I'm impressed!

[Thomas3.20.2010]

You handled the situation with Loving Grace! Well Done!