Ladies and Gentlemen!!!!

[Sootie]

..................and I use the terms "LOOSELY" on here tonight................

PLEASE STOP.

You know I respect all of your long quits.....I hope I have always conveyed that to you. I apologize for this blog...I would generally express these opinions and thoughts in a private message. But, since your thoughts and opinions are public...so must mine be.

I think the person these latest blogs are directed to has already left the site or is leaving.......which is sad. We will never really get to know him and he will not become part of our EX community.

And, in my humble opinion, this could all have been avoided with just a slight change in how we respond to "quit ideas" we don't like.

And, isn't that what our goal is? To keep as many as we can---HERE AND QUIT? It isn't to tell new people they know nothing and we know everything.....is it? Because I don't know everything...about quitting or anything else.

I realize one of his blogs was crude and common and painted us all with one brush.....but if elders are to be wise about anything...shouldn't we have been wise enough to see this was only after he became angry feeling attacked?

I think we had a chance at the high road here....and we missed the turn.

And I still respect each and every one of you.

[Brenda_M]

{{{{{{{{{{{Sootie}}}}}}}}}}

Feel lucky, dear Sootie. I haven't felt the need to make that particular huggie emoticon {} in probably a decade. 😃

[joyeuxencore]

Sootie! I missed it all.I have limited site access still...can't get to my page or inbox...bummer! Thank you for always being there! xo

[wirerat123]

Thank you Sootie, you are a swan amongst turkey, and I'm sorry if you thought any of my anger was directed at you.  Yes, I'm done here after this post as I finally think I got the notifications no longer coming to my hotmail.

Thanks for being who you are.  To the rest, well, I don't know what to say.  I don't hate any of you, and I'm sorry this is what it is.

Thanks to each and every one of you who has tried to encourage me, thanks to those of you who are trying desperately to get me to stay around, and depserately want to help me along during my quit and are genuinely concerned.  Thank you, and God bless each and every one of you.

I just don't need this crap during my quit.  I'm thanking God every minute that through some strange miracle through all of this, I still have no desire for a cigarette.

So Thank you again Sootie!  I wish you all the best, and I really hope everyone that ever comes through here finds a much better place than I found, and can use it to quit.

Best of luck to you all, may your quits be easy and your interactions be pleasant.  Love you ALL!

[zinamarie]

The person you refer to has not left he just posted on my page, I think he's enjoying this.... just my view.  Protect Your Quit.  I agree with the (((((((hugs)))))))

[wirerat123]

Well, just FYI, you just made a liar out of me Peggy, I figured I would walk away from here after that post to Peggy, but when it comes to your post, I just couldn't help it.  See, if you had given me a chance, you'd find out, I'm pretty honest.

Now to respond to your post about me.  YOU, do not know ME.  you think you have it figured out, but you are wrong.  This is upsetting as hell that you people would act like this to someone, and team up like a bunch of elitists.

There are at least 5 people who agree with me that the person you are backing and defending was being unreasonable.  That's NOT including Sootie.  You, and several other EXperts have done nothing but continue to try to discredit me, and muddy my name, despite being told by several people you are being inflamatory and unfair to me.

I'm sorry it makes you EXperts uncomfortable that a newbie would call you out on your BS attitudes.  What's also said is that NONE OF you have tried to make it right except Sootie.  Not one of you, instead you continue to team up and portray an elitist attitude, and continue to attack me.

You are refusing to see the truth of the situation no matter who points it out to you.  Sad thing about that is that attitude alone tells me, this will happen again, none of you will care that you attacked and ran away a person needing your help because ultimately, we're faceless accounts on your website, and apparently since we're new to quitting and don't have your credibility, we're not allowed to have a voince and diasgree with the EXperts without being attacked.

My request for my account deletion is in, my account settings are setup to ensure that once I hit the log out button I don't have to see any indicators of this site no longer, and judging by your JUDGEMENT of ME, that's a good friggen thing.  How many people will you run away before you accept that some of your "Experts" might be the catalysts for some problems and address it as it needs to be addressed?

I'm out, I've said my piece, I pray for you, and the people that will come here in the future to be confronted by these people.  I pray that you guys don't screw it up for them, because you've been awfully close to screing it up for me.  Luckily I'm just asshole enough to not let your negative and falsley judgemental posts and the attacks of your Elitist friend screw me up on my goal so far.  Open your eyes and face the truth, or be an elitist in denial.  From this point forward that is no longer my problem.

I still wish you all he best in life, ALL of you.  I'm headed to a positive place.

[Brian100]

Thanks, Sootie for your post.  I think we missed the turn too. 

[Kimshine]

Yes, thank you Sootie. I like the examples you set. 

 My grandma always used to tell us kids (let me add that they have not always been easy to follow)-MAY YOUR WORDS BE SOFT AND SWEET-SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO EAT THEM.

Collectively, We more than misse the turn!

[pir8fan]

OK! I did not arrive late to this party! I was following it from the word go! I understand that some may have though he was selling e-cigs! But he was told that was not good so he deleted the info! If he was selling them, we gave him ample opportunity to promote them by not droping it and letting it end! If that was his goal he would have tried again! Then we would have known!

This guy was no MP! I did PM him and try to EXplain how he upset people! I pointed out that he held his own in defending his views! I did not mention that he was respectful until he lost his temper. Truth of the matter is, that he was! I did tell him he lost when he started calling people names! Most of us will react to that! No matter how heavy our investment here! Of course by then he thought I was attacking him, and it was not possible to reason with him!

So for the most part Sootie, you are right! I do not give him a pass on painting all EXperts with the same brush and not apologizing for it! I understand why he did it, but at some point he should have realized he was blasting people who were not involved!

Thank you Sootie for this well thought out, and respectful blog! I do not view it as a lecture! You stated that this was "in my humble opinion", and said "And I still respect each and every one of you. You are entilted to state your opinion, and others are entitled to disagree! Hopefully, in the end we will all be better for having the discussion! 

Tommy

[Dakota_Posse]

Crap, I missed the party......I have not a clue what's going on.....will go back and get caught up.  I need a secretary...

[Nyima_1.6.13]

Thanks Tommy and Sootie! Nice to have the EXpert voice of reason here and speaking up with a perception I can identify with. Sorry Wirerat, this has been awful!!

[Danno_11-10-12]

I caught on to this once the whole thing had already grown legs and got out of control.  I think Wire rightfully felt attacked from the word go on his blog and his intentions appeared good.  By the end, his vulgarness and broad attacks on so many others  made his plight less sympathetic. 

The whole thing was an embarassment.   

[Brian100]

It really is a shame when someone new joins, and in his enthusiasm to compile a list of resources for quitters, he is put on the defensive right away.  Dale needed to report him for including a link to a discount e-cig?  Breakinthechains needed to taunt someone already in meltdown mode on the new member’s own message board?  Really, that’s what EXperts do? 

Yeah, after being pushed he said some naughty words and challenged some sacred cows and then some more EXperts respond by posting their own temper tantrums about how they deserve respect. Yikes.  

Some EXperts showed their expertise which I greatly appreciate.  Tommy reached out and Sootie was compassionate and reasonable as always.  If Sootie’s post is a lecture, it’s a good one, and I learned something from it. 

[alysonoholic]

For me you hit the nail on the head, Sootie. As a newbie I definitely appreciate what you have said here.

[owlfeather]

Grace in Motion......

[ACT269]

What did I miss?

[mary242]

tommy and sootie...youre just like parents around here. Im glad and feel safe knowing youre watching over us all.Thanks and God bless you and all of us.   Mary

[SmokedOut041412]

Sootie,

Thank God I've missed most of what has gone on lately---and thank you for this blog...

Because,,, I have seen this type of thing in the past.

I couldn't agree with you more! 

Much ♥ and Respect to YOU.

[Bonnie11.3.2009]

 Thank you for stopping this Sootie, it was far from our best. 

[mygirls-6-5-17]

I was so upset the other day that I chose to stay away, I am so glad I read this! Thanks Sootie, it gives me so hope and desire to stick around!

[Leeza]

Hopefully, all of this can be put to rest.  I've witnessed these drama in the past and personally find them very distasteful.  I even recall that it was once suggested to handle these situations through private mail.  Sootie, thank you for your comments here.  I am here to work my quit and my recovery.  That's where I intend to keep my focus. 

[Joan_01-02-2015]

I don't know what happened, but I appreciate your wisdom and insite.  I can tell you I have gained nothing but positive messages and feelings from this site.  That's all I can say - except "thank you"!