I'm quitting... again. This time I intend to quit for good. I have a one-year-old little girl, and a two-year-old son. I had a gigantic wake up call when my son picked up a craft stick and said he was smoking like me... OUCH! Talk about feeling like a failed mommy! And my daughter may be too young to show me she notices, but she's breathing it in.
My husband has wanted me to quit, but neither of us really know what role he's supposed to play in all of this. I feel like a wimp going to my combat vet husband because I want a cigarette. He's a tough guy, and while I know he'd probably hug me and tell me it was all ok, it just feels so awkward to be weak when I should be a strong support in this family. I've asked him to be hard on me, but at the first comment I went off blubbering like a big baby and we both felt like hot garbage. Definitely wasn't the way to go for us!
So I guess I'm taking this a day at a time. It's intimidating trying again when I've had so much failure in my past when it comes to quitting. All I can do is keep trying, keep going, and keep making progress. I want to be around for my kids as they get older.
Good luck, self!
