I've noticed that I'm actually smoking more today. I wonder if it's anxious "stocking-up" before the big day on the 28th. It's kind of ironic. But...if this goes like last time I took the bupropion, I should notice waning desire to smoke beginning sometime next week. So I'm not worried about it. I've been wandering around the site and been so impressed with everyone's bright, positive outlook. I've joined other quit smoking sites in the past and left because I just got so tired of everyone constantly talking about their "quits" and nothing else. Here, people seem to talk more about their lives and what they're doing and their hobbies and stuff. That's great because going forward, I hope to get to the point where I'm not obsessing about smoking or thinking much about it at all. I've been there before, but at the moment I can't remember what it feels like.
It's hard to explain how I feel...I just don't want smoking to rule my life anymore. And I feel like after I quit, if quitting is all I talk about or think about, then smoking will **still** rule my life. Does that make sense to anyone? I just want to quit, deal with the cravings as they come, and forget about it the rest of the time. If I can. Unless it's to celebrate how freaking AWESOME I feel, milestones, etc. Meh...I'm still not expressing the thought properly.
