How can I be the me that I need when addiction it runs so deeply in me???©
I have mastered change within. The emotional control aspect. And here comes part two. The deeply rooted, hard to conquer **bleep**, that grips a hold of you in ways you can't even fathom a path out..... If I wanted to be the me that I needed to be the change that I see. That part was long, drawn out over years but now I challenge one of my deepest darkest of fears. Saying no to myself about something so habitual. I swear you'd think this **bleep** was hella ritual.. I mean its become that, I suppose. Something of habit and tradition it rose. For those before me set pretty negative renditions. I did what I saw. Cope with stress it may seem. But at this point all I want is to be my own being. Not what I saw and not what I did but a new version of me. A better one instead.
This is hard. I want it. But do I have the strength? Can I conquer this habit and can I connect the links? I know there's a path out. I hope to find it pretty soon. I just need a community. that will leave me no room. The errors must be called out. The excuses put on blast. I need people to be real to me, and replace some of my past.....
Okay sometimes I get in a vibe and it spills out. But I am serious about quitting. And to be honest I am building my village of people that encourage greatness. I hope to cross paths with people that cn be there for me in that way. My own family and friends weren't the best positive influencers and I am on a path to build a circle of people that will encourage growth, change, and success....
This is my Step 1...
