Naive of me, I know, but I really did think it would be easier by now. I'm struggling more in the past couple weeks than I was a couple months ago. I had to practically run out of a bar and leave my friends because I couldn't sit there and watch them smoke. I'm having a really hard time identifying the triggers. Obviously drinking, but lately I've been craving a cigarette all the time. Like right now, for instance. I am seriously craving a cigarette. Why? I'm not stressed out. I'm not bored, or lonely, or drinking. I'm at work. I never smoked at work anyway, so why now? Maybe the change in weather? But it's hot outside! I don't want to go out and get all sweaty and smelly. What I want is that feeling of completeness that you get after smoking. I was hoping I'd be over it. Its been like 9 months since I last bought a pack of cigarettes. I think I need to reaffirm my commitment to quitting.
Ok, official reaffirmation of my commitment to my quit:
I will not smoke ever again. I hate smoking, it is a disgusting horrible drug. I love being able to go jogging and not have stinky hair and my teeth are getting whiter and I can kiss my boyfriend whenever I want with no worries of ashtray breath. I love having an extra thirty bucks a week to buy pizza or wine. I love relishing in my own strength and willpower. I love that my boyfriend is proud of me for quitting. I love that I am proud of me.
All right. I feel better now. Thanks for your support!
