I have failed....miserably

[annaaustin623]

I had not smoked cigarettes in a couple of months. I found out my 17 year old daughter was pregnant and found my old vaping kit, that I had used previously years ago to try and quit and started using it....with nicotine juice (or whatever you call it) Now I feel like I have ultimately failed. I have been sneaking around using this stupid thing and feel like a complete failure. I do not wan to go through withdrawals again, that was horrible but I can not continue to use this vape thing my kids and spouse would be so disappointed if they knew. I just want to cry, I cant believe I let this happen! UGH!!

[maryfreecig]

       Crap happens. You are human and raw emotions can lead us down the wrong path before we know it--even if we think we know what we are doing goes against our own best interests. You are here. Begin again. Take it as a lesson and think about smobriety...how to grow it. Because crap will not stop happening. Smobriety helps us get beyond knee jerk reactions. 

        In AA, I use to hear the expression You slipped so I didn't have to meaning the person who slipped shared what happened and gave everyone a chance to think of their own weaknesses. I'm smober, but I'm no where near perfect, never will be. Your sharing what happened has helped me. And for you, I hope you stay around, reclaim your quit--you earned it and it is waiting for you to come back. Yes you can one day at a time.

[Roller831]

You can do this!  I will be honest and the thing that keeps me from smoking is having to go back to Day 1.  I just don't ever want to do that again.  So....go back to Day 1 and make this the last time you have a Day 1.  It sounds like your mind is made up so now prepare yourself to quit and do it.  Remember...withdrawals are temporary and no one died from quitting smoking or vaping.  You can do it!  We are here to support and help you!

Hopefully, you realize that smoking/vaping doesn't really change anything and probably added to the stress of what is going on in your life right now.  

Hang in there and let us know how best we can help and support you!  I'm glad you are here!

Roller

[annaaustin623]

Wow, thank you for giving me another perspective on it. 

[annaaustin623]

maryfreecig‌ I was trying to reply to your comment. Thank you so much.

[maryfreecig]

Understood!

[YoungAtHeart]

NOOOO  reason to feel like a failure.  Most everyone here took more than one try before they succeeded at being smokefree for life.

Dust yourself off, get your quit kit handy - and get back at it.  The early days aren't fun - but they ARE doable.  They end ---- unlike COPD and some other miserable things that await you if you keep smoking.

Get to it!!!  We'll help!

Nancy

[elvan]

How miserable to be sneaking around...I know that feeling, I did it for a while a long time ago when my family thought I had quit.  I suggest setting a date and going back to a quit plan and staying close to the site.  You'll be smober and you will be able to use what helped you in the past.  It is not easy but it IS possible and take if from someone who has COPD, there is absolutely NOTHING that is worth going through this...NOTHING.  I hope things work out for your family, I am sure this is an incredibly difficult time but I know that smoking doesn't help anything or fix anything.  You CAN do this...let us help you.

Ellen

[SimplySheri]

There are no failures, only learning opportunities.  Bless your heart, you have a lot on your plate and you reacted with self-harm.  I think we often used to do that as smokers and it gets to be almost a self-protective instinct to grab one when we are hurt or confused or angry.  That in itself is a lesson learned, isn't it?  We need to learn different ways of responding when life's surprises come.  Forgive yourself and move forward   That little grandbaby is going to need his/her grandma!!

Namaste,

Sheri

[JACKIE1-25-15]

I am sorry that you feel like you have failed but life is going to happen and has to go on.  Put some tools in place to use when life crisis arrives. Be prepared.  It has been a while since you have been around. Come here and use the support. That is what we are here for.  Let us know what is going on so we may be able to help you before you smoke.   Try hanging out here more until your quit is more solid and your quit smoking tools are powered almost automatically.  Get rid of all the old smoking apparatus or anything else associated with smoking.  It means you no good.  Make a commitment that no matter what you will not smoke.  Come here first.    I hope by now you have stopped smoking or at least have set a new date.  I wish the best for you, your daughter and future grandchild.    

[Barbscloud]

No judgements here.  We've all attempted to quit numerous times.  Just don't wait too long to get back on track--it will only make it harder.

[elvan]

I remember feeling that way..many times, I was my own worst critic.  Take it easy on yourself, be your own friend and know that you are not alone.

Ellen

[Christine13]

I am new in my quit.  I can just feel your emotions, as I have two daughter's.  Both got pregnant before they were married, altho they weren't nearly as young as your daughter.  Please don't beat yourself up for what will be a major life change for your family.  You can get it back, you have a grandbaby, to possibly help raise, and it would be best if you could stay smokefree for that event.