I am back again

[Cindy8]

Very embarrassed and disgusted with myself for giving in after a 70+ day quit. I do have to honestly say that once I started this quitting in 2005 a cigarette has never tasted the same for me.

Not sure what I am going to do, or what I need to stay strong, I have been over and over it in my mind, what happened, where did I fail. not even sure I can put my finger on it.

But here I am back and at it again. Determined, and armed with my determination. Wish me luck, pray for me to have the strenght I need, because I am really tired of this stupid up and down roller coaster I keep myself on.

[candice-smith]

you're back and you want to quit so thats half the battle! i'm at my 100 day mark and i continue to stay on the program, it helps me to remember how hard it was to get where i'm at and the support that i recieve is awesome!

[hothula]

aloha cindy, sometimes a relapse is what you need, it makes you feel terrible, guilty, ashamed and more. you have to do the hard work of the detox again. you have the hindsight to know how great it is not to smoke. the hindsight to know you can go for very long periods without smoking. you will get tired of doing it all again and the next time when your junkie thinking starts to talk to ya you will say no. not going to do that again. you will do this all the bits will fall together for you. just go for it. you will get it done.

[becky16]

Hi Cindy,
I'm glad that you are at least back. So, you backslid. There is nothing you can do about the past. What is past is past. All you can do is go on from here....start anew and face your demon with all your strength. Beating yourself up will not do any good. Just try and learn from your mistake. If you don't know what triggered your smoking, you need to search for it. You know that you have many here for you....to give you support and encouragement. Personally, I'm glad you are back....at least you haven't given up trying!! You know what you have to do, so get started and I can help in any way, just let me know.

[miguel]

HI CINDY, welcome back don`t beat urself up. i know for a fact that relapsing is punishment enough. ur doing the rite thing by not giving up on ur quit....... i blew my quit after a whole month, i still feel terrible everytime i think about it, but, then i look at the brite side of it all, just a temporary set back i`ll never quit quitting, stay strong gurl, we learn from our own mistakes.......stay in touch

[Cindy8]

Thank you all for you encouraging words. I will be checking in here as often as possible.