You’ve been a best friend for so many years. You were the first to be there when I started rebelling against my dad. You got me through all those party years in my 20s. You helped me handle all the stresses and traumas that life through at me. I couldn’t go anywhere without you and always had to make sure you were by my side before I fell asleep at night. You were the one I wanted as soon as my eyes opened, and all those years we shared coffee together. But at some point, you turned me into a co-dependent. My brain and body needed those hits of dopamine. You started ruining my ability to enjoy time with my friends and family. You made people turn away from me in disgust and treat me badly. You talked me out of going to the gym, and you encouraged me to have another drink. All the while you hurt me. It’s time for me to move in another direction. It’s time for me to be free of your constant demands. It’s time for me to release the inner demons that needed you so they could live. They (and you) are a part of me that’s changing, growing, and learning to love to live in light. To embrace the moments instead of running outside to take a puff. Thank you for being there all these years. You were a wonderful friend and always there when I needed you. It’s just time for me to go now. The only constant is change, and every beginning has an ending. Love, Colleen
