Good morning everyone. It's a beautiful January day in Nebraska which we don't come by often. I've taken the day off work and splurging on a delux pedicure and manicure, something I couldn't really afford prior to buying a carton of cigarettes every 10 days. Can't believe I spent over 40 years wasting my life and wasting heaps of money. I did it on my own to make life suck when I could have done so much to improve it earlier. I tried many times but can honestly say I didn't try hard enough. Mr. Cig was my very best friend for thousands of hours. I was married for close to 20 years to an abusive drunk. In relationship to H.A.L.T. My cravings were there. Paired with hungry, anger, lonely and tired cigarettes were my savior. Even though I had been out of that relationship for close to 20 years, proving I am a drug addict to nicotine. Like my EX shouting at me that I couldn't live without him even though he was actually killing me Mr. Cig continued to shout I just couldn't live without the nicotine. I was sick, very, very sick bound by my own emotions and thoughts.
On 8-19-12, I declared my Independence Day. I am a strong, free, surviving women. Today I wish I could run with the wind and let it blow through my hair. Thanks to my new friends here EX.
