Fell of the wagon

[smoke-free9]

Yesterday was a really bad day, smoked 10 cigs, was down to 4. I thought this was going to be pretty easy, but was I wrong. All that I that I have learned and been practicing went out of the window yesterday.  Feeling shame, guilt and even  anger at myself. My quit day is in 4 days and yesterday was a major set back. It feels like I am starting all over again, with only 4 days to quit! Some doubts are creaping in. Am I going to be able to do it??? Today I tried to go back but still smoked 5 cigs. Have to do better!!!! My life depends on it! So much going on in my life right now, Have to find the time to settle myself down and use all that I have learned and USE it!!!  I have to get the gum first thing tomorrow

[annb]

I basically did the same thing after getting down to 1 a day! Learned it the hard way what they say about "cutting down to 5 or less you just stay in worse withdrawal"! I quit completely the day after I smoked about 6 cigs. I'm on Day 8. YOU can do it!!! I'm rooting for you! Let's do this!!! 🙂

[moody_9-18-13]

Fear of failure is the biggest reason people don't quit smoking. I wrote a blog last night I invite you to read. I hope you see how important commitment and preparation for success in quitting is so important.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Moody_9-18-13-blog/2014/03/30/lifes-dragons

[linda258]

I'm not sure I understand.... fell off what wagon.. you have not quit yet so you have not failed to stop smoking.   Read Allen Carr's book... research and prepare and when you are ready .... QUIT...

It you decide and think you will quit.... well, you can! 

[JonesCarpeDiem]

we've told you when you get down too low on nicotine (somewhere below 5 a day) you go into withdrawl.

did you not take that seriously?

[smoke-free9]

O.K. my quit day is Saturday, but I was cutting down each day and it was going pretty good until yesterday when i smoked 10. Now I feel the withdrawal more going back to 5 today. So I have till saturday to figure things out. Maybe you are right Annbowers that I was fooling myself with cutting down. But I though I would lower the nicotine in my body so the withdrawal wouldn't be so drastic, It was very emotionally charged day. @ weeks later celebrating my birthday and my granddaughter whom I taken care of her first 10 years of her life not only completely forgot about my BDay but was not there. I was really hurt. We spent most of the time time talking how to help her get her life back on track and how helpless we feel as her mother whom she moved to alowes her anything and everything. She is not doing well at school and there is no discipline whatsoever. Yes she is rebelling but it is causing me so much distress as I feel like she really letting everybody down including herself. Her friends are leading her down the wrong side of the road. Felling helpless and that was the main reason for my smoking so much yesterday. Just couldn't get her out of my head. Today is better, I will go right now read your post fear of failure. So saturday is the big day.

thanks guys

love & light

[promise_judy]

We are learn things differently, but once you learn something you just need to act on it. Sorry you had to learn the hard way but don't beat up yourself over it. Just read and learn about nicotine is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Get prepared for your quit and then you will be ready.

[cheyenne7]

You want to quit.....I can hear it in your blogs.....you will do this.....

Please prepare, as they suggest here.....had I prepared better, my quit would have been easier....

Your family needs you, and a smoke-free you will be a great gift for both you and them... 

The experienced people here know what they are talking about.....I understand, I learn the hard way too.....but if you can, do yourself a favor, and hear what they are saying....

Peace

[smorgy8513]

Don't beat yourself up.     You hadn't quit, so you didn't fall off wagon.     When you quit....you are quit!      Great if that is on Saturday.       One thing I would like to say and I offer this with all the respect in the world.      When you say you smoked the 10 cigarettes it was because of the situation with your grand daughter.  Being hurt, feeling worried are solid reasons for feeling bad.     They are NOT reasons to smoke.     People who don't smoke feel those things too.      And I've found, for me, that if I am going to say "this reason or that reason" is grounds for smoking I will find more and more of them.        You made a choice to smoke more yesterday, doesn't make you a terrible person, but please recognize and be honest with yourself about it.     Otherwise the next time something like that happens your mind will feel that you have the right to smoke......

Ok, get ready.....Saturday is coming!     

Sharon   239 days of Freedom!

[klv]

Back on the wagon allows you to stay in a place of comfort. You are fimilar with your loyal friend. If you re-start your quit with a NOPE attittude your focus becomes improving yourself vs, trying to change your daughter. Tough phase on everyone.

This is a tough cross road. Your daughter is no reason for you to smoke.. This is a decision  You are so worth the effort. You are honoring your daughters and other love ones with a EX committment to self. I believe in you/ Now lets get it done this time, no excuses!

Kevin 149

[YoungAtHeart]

When you do the reading, you will learn that smoking does not ONE thing that you think it does for you.  It is all a LIE!  You think it calms your nerves - all it REALLY does is stop the demand for nicotine in your brain, allowing you to feel calmer because the demand has calmed.  If you don't smoke, you will actually be CALMER!

Do the reading, please!  It will make this quit so much easier for you!

Nancy

[marilyn_marmac]

Don't beat yourself up. Keep reading, keep learning, keep trying. If nicotine was an easy quit, it wouldn't be called an addicition. Just remember, the bottom line is that YOU have to fight the addicition and say NOPE...regardless of how much you want one. Keep your attitude positive that you CAN and WILL beat it. Sending positive thoughts your way.

[lindan_7-14-10]

Take a deep breath, repeat. You are going to get this. It is a process. One day at a time. One moment at a time. One step at a time. Don't give up, by giving in. You are well worth the effort. Happy journeying♥

[OldBones-Larry]

You just had a stumble. Pick yourself up and dust off. You can climb up when you are ready to. We will support you all the way.

[smoke-free9]

Hi Sharon I agree with you completely that no matter what happpens in our life, good or bad, it NO REASON TO SMOKE, yes just a poor excuse to do it. Last time I quit it was for 6 months and it was then when my granddaughter did something very similar to what she is doing now. It upset me terribly emotionally because for the first 10 years of her life I was her main care giver. Her mother was neglecting her so I stepped in. My son and her seperated divorced. They both have new partners for the past 5-7 years. My son was instilling discipline, routine, rewards for good behaviour, respect, setting gols, etc. All the good things. Whenewer my granddaughter go for visit with the mother, it took then couple of weeks to get back to her normal routine as her mother ha no rules, lets her do what she wants, rewards her for bad behaviour. So it is very worysome that my granddaughter took the easu way out and moved back with her mother. Whe i told her the last time after not smoking for 6 months I started smoking again because of her, she lauged me and said I didn't kmake you do anything, you did it all on your own. And I have to admit she was right. You would have thought that I tearned my lesson the first time around??? I alowed the same pater to repeat itself again and blamed my bgranddaughter for it. Well I am taking responsibility for my actions. Yes, I messed up, I smoked 10 cigs nobody did it for me.I have the right to FEEL what ever I am feeling, but doing it without Smoking

Thanks everybody for you notes. 

Gaing strength and courage and more self confidence in myself as I am writing this

[jwa2530484]

I am disappointed in myself as well! I was down to 10 cigarettes a day. My sister tried to commit suicide last week and I found her and instantly reached for cigarettes for comfort. I knew at the time it was a stupid choice but still allowed myself to do it! I smoked a whole pack in one day and now I'm struggling to get back down to even the 10 a day that I had reached before! I feel like the willpower to quit is gone! Please give me suggestions to get my willpower back!!!