Desperately need to stop!

[lanerobin65]

Hello everybody.  Hope you're all doing well on your journey to becoming a nonsmoker.  I'm 62 yrs old live in a small town in NC. I'm a cashier in a grocery store.  I live with my chiuauaha "baby". I've been a smoker since I was 12-16. Never really took quitting seriously until the last couple of years and even more so the last 6 months. Diagnosed with copd at 34 but never saw a pulmonary dr. In the last 5 yrs I've been hospitalized 4 times with pneumonia and flu/pneumonia last time. I'm also diabetic. I'm not whining I'm just wanting you guys to know how serious this is so you all can remind me how serious it is when I'm weak. Anyway something has changed for the worst with my breathing since Christmas.  I wheeze and have shortness of breath all the time. I've been on steroids and inhalers and antibiotics but they don't seem to help much. I have a nebulizer and all the paraphernalia an old smoker collects, patches chantix (makes me throw up) gum etc.Up until this past year I could still walk 1-3 miles in an hour and work out in the yard strenuously without too much trouble but not anymore.  I mean I still try. Smoking is taking my peace from me. It makes me sad when I light a cigarette these days. Of course I'm still doing it and suffering those feelings. I am serious about quitting.  Thank y'all in advance for anything you can share to help. Hope I didn't bore you guys to much

 Blessings.

[maryfreecig]

You are still "doing it" because you are addicted. Part of quitting is about facing the fact that this is 100% addiction and the way out is to quit with a plan and one day at a time only. Ex will be here for you everyday as you learn and make a plan for your quit (a plan includes a list of things you are willing to do other than smoke). In my opinion, it is not enough to try to scare yourself into quitting...most of us needed a plan we could go to everyday --especially to start with.

You will find there are several members with COPD who share their experiences with COPD and about their quitting. Please stick around. I know you are scared, but take your quit one step at a time. 

Now you know...you don't have to do this alone. Stick around, read, learn, comment, blog some more. Yes you can get the kind of quit you are looking for.

/blogs/oldbones-larry/2019/07/01/the-smithy by Larry. This blog was written about No Mans Land--a little further into a quit--but I think it applies to the very first courageous step of choosing to quit.

Helpful Blogs, Discussions, Comments, Videos, Links, Info Re Quitting  a list of links compiled by Giulia

What is the Single Best Thing You Can Do to Quit Smoking? - YouTube  

[elvan]

Welcome to EX, I will let YoungAtHeart‌ give you her traditional welcome because it really does help. Remembering that this IS an addiction and not just a habit is really important.  Read everything you can find about nicotine addiction and understand that recovery is a one day at a time journey.  I have COPD and I can no longer do many of the things I used to be able to do.  I would not wish this on anyone but I can tell you that between the support from this site and my own commitment not to smoke NO MATTER WHAT, got me through some really difficult times.  I have over six years now after smoking for 47 years.  EX works, my mantra was NOPE, Not One Puff EVER and I came here every morning and every evening.

You CAN do this and you are not alone.

Ellen

[JonesCarpeDiem]

I have a suggestion:

Every time, I mean EVERY TIME you reach for a smoke or think of smoking I want you to catch yourself and say, "I'm going to wait a little longer.

This will get you off autopilot and get you thinking instead of automatically smoking.

You don't need to torture yourself or deny yourself.

You don't need to count

Just say that EVERY TIME and watch how fast you are smoking less and less.

that will give you the initial confidence and retrain your thinking

[YoungAtHeart]

Welcome to the community!

Not to worry - you will NEVER bore us!  We want to help and if you want to share, we will always be here to listen!

The important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This easy and entertaining read provided a world of good information about nicotine addiction, most of which I was not aware.  I credit it in large part with my success at quitting.   You can search for it online or at your local library.

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmoking.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. Here is a video to inform you further about nicotine addiction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpWMgPHn0Lo&feature=youtu.be.

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort after you have tried to delay and distract.   I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  You need to start out with a plan to reduce use of them over time - which the patch does by decreasing the dose contained in them..  For the gum, you can start by cutting each piece in half, then in quarters, then sub regular gum of the same flavor in between, adding more and more regular gum.  For the lozenge, you need to start subbing a mint in between to begin, increasing the number of them over time. I do not recommend the e-cigarette for obvious reasons.

It will be informative if you do the tracking and separation exercises recommended here on the site. As you track each cigarette smoked, note its importance, and what you might do instead. Put each one off just a little to prove that you don't NEED a cigarette just because you think you do.
 

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to your regular places.
 
You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:
 https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

 Nancy

[indingrl]

 said for YOU and welcome to the site no - YOU didn't bore ME at all Congrats on YOUR self honesty and courage to admit what smoking has done to YOU since YOU were 12 YEARS OLD up to NOW at 62 YEARS with bad LUNGS and all the meds and hosptial stays and getting shorter on breathing to walk - Please keep blogging and sooner than YOU know - you will make YOUR NEW MINDSET to QUIT SUCKING on DEATH STICKS and live as a NON SMOKER by YOUR HEART CHOOSING just for YOU because YOU BELIEVE YOUR worth it

[Gai.C]

Welcome. We are All here for U. U are giving yourself the best gift of life by Quitting.  Make a plan and stick to it.  Decide how u want to Quit. NRT OR CT.  Read everything you can get your hands on.  If you don't have any u can't smoke any.  No amount of NRT will work if you're not committed.  Prayer and patches worked for me.  

[MarilynH]

Welcome to the community lanerobin65 I really can't add anything that isn't already please read the links suggested above me and keep reading everything you can because there's a wealth of information right here on this site to strengthen your resolve to kick the nicotine poison to the curb permanently it's not easy by any stretch of the imagination BUT it's Doable do the reading then pick your quit date and when your day ONE arrives keep your mind as well as your hands occupied and at the end of the day you'll be able to say YAY for Day WON with many more to come stay close because we're all here to help you in any way we can.....

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Welcome to the EX Community.  You have come to the right place to get support.  Know that quitting is doable. You have to make a commitment that no matter what is happening in your life is no reason to smoke but just an EXcuse.  Come here often, read study blogs and ask questions.  We are here for you.  Know that smoking is an addiction.  /blogs/JACKIE1-25-15-blog/2019/02/01/know-the-law?sr=search&searchId=045048b0-74d6-4004-9c1b-8636e78...  Read the suggested material. Education is the key to being successful.  You can do it, so many of us have.  Start telling yourself, yes you can do it to save your life. 

[sweetplt]

HI and Welcome to Ex’s lanerobin65 

I teared up reading your post because I want you to quit smoking...was shocked you still were smoking...Please Please do the advice/readings above me...and Quit...it isn’t easy, it takes hard work, but is doable...keep close to this support group...Please quit smoking your life depends on it...I care...and will help you on this journey...Gotcha in my heart...Colleen 484 DOF 

[lanerobin65]

Thank you so much for your message. I admit I'm so hardheaded and should've quit a long time ago.  I'm scared to death. Afraid I won't be able to quit. My breathing has gotten sooo bad! It seems like the breathing problems quadrupled overnight.  I'm an active person. I like to walk and garden and dance. Over the winter I've been more shut in and smoking not walking or gardening.  Now that it's time to do those things I'm really having problems.  Idk why I'm shocked but I am. I wheeze constantly and can't clear it by coughing which I do all the time lately.  I've been knowing since Christmas that things are bad yet I've continued to smoke like a dragon! What is wrong with me!?! It takes a nut job to keep doing it yet here I am. I'm one that lights up 5 minutes after I wake up. Well I've been up for 1 hour 5 minutes.  For me that's a big victory.  I'll take it and I'll keep coming here. I'm serious about this. Thank you for the love. I'll take all the help I can get cos I think smoking is going to kill me. My mom and dad died one year apart both with lung cancer. Please keep in touch I'm new to this and not electronically savvy. 

[YoungAtHeart]

It's not YOU!  This is an addiction, and it is said it is as difficult from which to break free as cocaine or heroine.  It is uncomfortable to quit, but lots of us here have done it successfully, some (like me) have accomplished it on our first and only try.  That CAN be you, too!  Do the recommended reading, prep, planning and come here for support.  Make a decision that you will not smoke another cigarette no matter what, and honor that decision every hour of every day in the beginning.  It gets easier as time passes and, at seven years, it's no longer even a blip on my radar.  I WILL happen for you, too.

[Barbscloud]

Welcome to the Ex and congrats on your decision to quit.  Educating myself about nicotine addiction and creating a quit plan made it possible for me.  I smoked for 50 years and recently celebrated 2 years smoke free.  I never thought I could do it.  I attempted to quit numerous times by picking  a quit date and  every aid, but didn't really understand what I was doing.  I was destined to fail.  

Have you picked a quit date, created a plan, going to use an aid, etc.?   Many of us continued to smoke even though we knew how it was effecting our health.  The reason is simple--we're addicted to nicotine.  

The support from this site has definitely contributed to my success.  Sharing experiences and receiving/giving support from other quitters is truly motivating.   There is much to learn here from quitters on every stage of their journey.   It can be scary at first, but remember you have nothing to lose.  It's a choice you can make for yourself.  Take the leap and know that we're here for you.  You just need to reach out.

Barb

[Daniela2016]

Welcome, and please stick with this site.  You've already been given the guide on how to start, and every single one of the members before me, were, at some point in a similar situation with you.  I've also tried on my own, used patches, gum, Welbutrin, hypnotherapy, but nothing helped me as this site did.  I wasn't understanding my "weakness" till I understood and accepted it is an addiction.  And followed the advice liberally given to me here.  Go out and read histories/blogs of people who celebrated their 1,2,3 or more years of smobriety (this is a slang we use for someone who quit smoking, and is staying quit).  Pick a style and make it your own, or just create your own style from different experiences.  No matter how you get through the first week (quit aids or not), then the second, then the No Man's Land, the important thing is to stay quit; it might take eating sugar free candies, using a straw for the hand to mouth habit, learning a new hobby, whatever works for you.  The most important thing for me at the beginning (I celebrated 4 years quit on March 11) was to be here, to blog once or twice/day, to cry, to ask for help, whatever it took, so I avoid picking the cigarette back.  With no fail, I had answers every time I asked for something, people were here seemingly only to teach me, but I also learned from my peers, those who started at the same time and faced similar changes.

Please make the decision, make a plan and become an EX, it is so incredibly important, and rewarding for your general health, for your lungs/heart health, and also for your mental health.  It all gets better together.

[sweetplt]

 You are not a nut job...so many of us should have quit smoking before the bad effects it caused...but we kept feeding the addiction...please stay with us...I can tell you want it...trying delaying your smokes, definitely read the material suggested, write here when you want to delay that smoke...we so understand...sending out a prayer for strength to you...~ Colleen 

[beazel]

Nothing new to add that hasn't been already said...

Educate yourself, commit (no smoking - NO MATTER WHAT!!!!),  try to stay positive - you will be talking to yourself alot - remind yourself of every little positive everyday,  stick around here - this support group will give you strength, lift you up, cheer you on every step of the way, listen and help however we can 24/7. Believe in you!!!

Yes it's scary, but we are proof, it can be done...commit.

One day at a time........

[lanerobin65]

Alright I'm gonna show my ignorance and it's embarrassing but... what do I need to do to be able to follow some of you? I can't figure it out plus I'm impatient.  Thanks in advance for helping.  Everyone has been so supportive and right now you guys are a HUGE part of my life. I really don't have close friends.  I'm single my sons live far away. The youngest is in Detroit which has me worried covid19 and all.  The friends I do have are married with kids at home and jobs and all that entails. Anyway I've been quarantined since last Friday.  No positive covid19 test. Around here they're only testing if you've been out of the country or know someone who has.  I've had runny nose headache body aches dry cough sore throat fever trouble breathing and a round of severe diarrhea and vomiting. I'm a cashier at a grocery store. I serve literally hundreds of people I don't know. Anyway I've been ill to the point of ending up in the emergncy room. Negative for the flu. Dr said I had a virus and to quarantine for 14 days but said he couldn't test me because of federal guidelines. Don't even get me started. Just wanted y'all to know I consider you my closest friends at the moment! God bless everyone whose responded to me. Take care my friends and be well. I continue to hold off the temptation to smoke because  of you.

[Barbscloud]

There's usually more than one way to do something.  If you right click on the persons name in this post that you want to follow a block will come up and at the bottom you can select Follow.

[Christine13]

I'm so sorry you are so sick.  I'm glad you are here.  It is an addiction, and it's very hard to stop.  So many here, the elders will guide you along the way.  So many here have been successful.  All the best to you, stay busy with puzzles, or books, I journal out my feelings.  The first step is realizing what it's doing to you and that you want to stop.

All the best to you.

[sweetplt]

lanerobin65 I took a shot of your page...look to the right above connections and you will see Message ... Give Badge ... and Follow ... say I want to befriend you...I would hit the follow...and it would alert you in your inbox that someone is following you and you can follow them...so click on me sweetp and hit the follow on my page ... and that will show you how it is done... let us know if you are still not getting it...this site is a bit tough to get around...and takes time...

Also, glad you are in quarantine...however, Thank you for what you are doing for all of us...it is tough working in grocery store right now...~ Colleen 

[SuzyQ411]

So happy you have joined us lanerobin65‌...This thing that has a hold over us..this addiction to nicotine..,is a sorry state of affairs. And all the medical problems it creates for us smokers. I identify with a lot of what you wrote in your introductory blog post. I'm a relative "newbie" myself... I have been quit for 87 days..I stopped smoking AGAIN on January 6, 2020 after a relapse. The longer I'm on this site, the more long-term quitters I meet. Many of them have given So, I know it can be done! (I hope you will follow the advice they have given you (above). One of the techniques that has helped me greatly is deep breathing. Here's an example: Focus on the picture and breathe as it instructs you. It brings peace and fresh oxygen to our staved lungs. And can help stave off cravings.

Something else that helped greatly was to write a goodbye letter to my cigarettes. It helped cement in my brain the reality of my need to quit and my commitment to do so.

Perhaps writing such a letter would help you as well. Here's my farewell letter if you'd care to read it:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/people/SuzyQ411/blog/2020/01/03/goodbye-forever?sr=search&searchI... 

Wishing you well.

~Suzy