Day 7, hour 10, minute whatever - feeling blah

[DLHaffner]

Feeling a lot less ambitious today.  I thought I would be pumped, it's day 7, officially I have been smoke-free for an entire week.  I don't think I've gone 7 days smoke-free since I started smoking in my teens.  I had a really productive Saturday.   I woke up early, went to the Gym, stopped by the car dealership to see about getting my cabin air filter changed - I CAN NOT stand the way my car smells now it's so disgusting, then ran some errands, napped, went to dinner and bowling with friends.  Then Sunday, I woke up in a really bad mood, my stomach was super hurty because I've been so constipated and I was seriously considering smoking to make it go away.  One of my friends suggested that I drink some magnesium citrate saline, which you can buy at Target, so I did.  It's supposed to produce a reaction within 30 minutes to six hours, and right around hour five when nothing had happened and I was super uncomfortable I decided well if I don't poo by the sixth hour I'm smoking.  It must mean I should smoke.  Well, long story short right around the sixth hour it kicked in and then I spent pretty much the rest of the night with the opposite problem.  I am definitely no longer constipated.  I wasted the entire day yesterday, Sunday.  I was in my jammies except for the Target run and watched The Magicians and napped and was cranky to my husband the whole day.  I totally wasted the day.  

It's radically disturbing to me to know that my digestive system is so affected by not smoking.  I won't go into detail but I've had stomach problems for years and now I wonder if it's directly related to smoking?  I'm sure it is.  Not sure if it's from yesterday but physically and mentally I just feel down.  Maybe from doing nothing productive yesterday?  I almost called out sick to work but it's easier to not smoke when I'm at work so even if I sit here and do nothing it's better than being at home.

When do you really start to feel better?  I've read 21 days, 90 days, 130 days...what's the deal.  I just feel like fudge...this is stupid.  I'll probably smoke anyway so why am I torturing myself?

Oh' this might be helpful to other new non-smokers but when I went to the car dealership to ask about getting the smoke smell out and replacing the cabin air filter the service manager said they have this machine that sucks all the air out of the car and will get rid of the smell like 90%.  They do it when they get a smoker's trade in but haven't done it for a regular customer before...so they're doing that to my car today.  I paid to get it detailed too as my 1-week reward.  That's what's keeping me smoke-free today...I paid to have my car detailed and get the smoke smell out so I can't smoke today.

[YoungAtHeart]

Stop the "I'll probably smoke anyway" thoughts."  That's the addict within - so don't let it have the upper hand.  When those thoughts start in - change your mind's direction.  Go for a walk (exercise also helps constipation - although I recommend you do that BEFORE the nitrite!), count the blue things in the room, play a computer game.  Get your mind on something ELSE -- because thinking like that will eventually lead to talking yourself into smoking. 

And - you did not waste a day.  You QUIT SMOKING FOR A WHOLE DAY!  That was NOT a wasted day.  NOPE!

Quitting smoking is like a roller coaster ride with ups and downs and twists and turns.  You will have some good days, and then some bad ones.  When you smoked they weren't all good, either - but you got that hit of dopamine that made you think differently - for a little while.

You are due for another good one - soon.  Hang on!

Nancy

[freeneasy]

You're doing a great job with your quit. It was a great idea to reward yourself by having your car detailed. I think smoking acts like a laxative. I had the same problem when I quit. You're going through the toughest days now and quitting is a major physical and mental change. Don't sabotage your confidence. You won't go back to smoking if you stay positive, remember why you quit, and that you're doing the best thing you can do for yourself. 

I've been on this site for over 6 years and know that if you come here and read and blog you can and will stay smoke-free. You'll always have a blah day once in a while but smoking won't cure the "blahs" I'd rather have a blah smoke-free day any day than go back to smoking.

[TW517]

There have been several discussions here about "digestive" issues since I joined last June.  Some people never experience them.  Others, like me and you, have it bad.  To answer your question, mine lasted 4 weeks.  In each of those weeks, I got so desperate, I either drank a magnesium citrate or gave myself an enema.  I was literally saying to myself, "How bad could cancer (or COPD, or heart disease) be?"  But it did finally end!  And I'm pretty sure that you and I both know, as bad as those "digestive" issues are, they are short term and far preferable to what cigarettes will do to us.  I hope you don't have to go through this much longer.  Until then, you have my deepest empathy!

[Chuck-2-20-2011]

So often in the second week, we get the blahs. I think this is because in the first week we're prepared for the hell that we know will come. Then comes the second week and though we're proud of the accomplishment of the first week, it kind of feels like there's nothing to look forward to. This can make a person feel suddenly listless and just plain sad.

 Really, there still are things to look forward to. I remember well how hard it is at first and also that I made it by staying focused on my goal of freedom. The main thing is you're still smoke free. That's the most important thing for you right now. 

 Sure, there's a lot of side effects with quitting an addiction but the thing is, we do so many horrible things to our bodies when we smoke, without realizing that their are chemicals in cigarettes to mask the side effects of smoking. Because of this, we feel fine when we smoke, because all of the negative aspects are masked, and then when we quit, it seems like all we're feeling is discomfort.

 Stay strong! There's absolutely no reason to give up and go through the first week again! We're here to help. Come here and blog until you feel better, even if it takes a while. As always, I'm looking forward to hearing of your continued success!

ONWARD TO FREEDOM!!!

Chuck

[MichelleDiane]

It's understandable that your mind is racing and you are not feeling settled.  I'm sure many people in this community will tell you they went through similar experiences including myself.  Just know that it is temporary and will pass.  Use the detailing on your car to motivate you to do other things that give you joy.  Every day smoke free is a day to celebrate.  You don't have to spend a lot of money.  If you spent $10 per pack (not sure where you live) take half of it and buy a Starbucks or a new magazine, or something else you might enjoy.  Hell week is over.  I agree with Nancy though.  You do need to change the language.  Don't have a defeatist attitude.  Give yourself more credit to hold your resolve to quit.  Keep coming to this community.  It works.  Make it a great day.

-Michelle

[JonesCarpeDiem]

cut an apple in half and put them cut side up under your front seat. Change as necessary.

[maryfreecig]

     It gets better. Ur, you get better as the attachment--fixation---addiction stuff fades. Everyday that you stay smober you are growing your quit--your smobriety. You will not have to work so hard at it--after all not-smoking is normal and the brain eventually remembers. So keep working your quit, you have earned it. Congrats on your progress to date!

[DLHaffner]

Dear Nancy,

THANK YOU!   You're completely right.  I need to stay positive.  I do need to stay positive and definitely needed that reminder.  Thank you for taking the time to pull my pity party covers.  

Danielle

[DLHaffner]

Thank you for the reminder to stay positive!  

[DLHaffner]

Thank you for sharing your experience....4 weeks   oh no!!!  I know you say everyone is different but I still appreciate your experience!  Isn't it crazy that smoking is so impactful in our digestive systems?!  I guess I always thought well it's not hurting me but in reality and logically I knew that it was.

Thank you again for sharing your experience and I pray this doesn't last a month but won't be shocked if it does.

[elvan]

DLHaffner I so wish that we could answer you as to when it really gets better but it varies with everyone.  Some people feel better sooner than others.  I can remember feeling pretty depressed when other people would talk about how much better they felt after a short period of time...10 days, 2 weeks...people felt like they had more energy, they could DO more, walk more, they looked better...they could already see changes in their skin.  Well...I was not so lucky.  I did not have more energy, I could not breathe more easily, I absolutely could not go for brisk walks.  I waited too long...let me tell you, if I could go back and quit earlier, I would do it in a heartbeat.  I CAN'T go back...you don't HAVE to...just go forward.  Look at how far you have come and you have apparently found the answer to the constipation...I think I would try to drink lots more liquids and see if you can just get your body to reset.  It WILL adjust.  Some people have different issues...MINE was and IS breathing...the damage I did is irreversible and I would not wish it on my worst enemy.  Seriously, I have shortened my life and dramatically reduced the quality of what life I have and I cannot get back even one minute of the time when I smoked.  It is NOT worth it.  I CAN smell things now, I AM proud of myself and I have earned the respect of my kids, not that they were disrespectful before but NOW, I feel like I have EARNED it.  You can do this and it is worth whatever you need to go through to get to the point where you really believe it.  Cigarettes will do nothing FOR you but they are more than happy to do things TO you.

Ellen

[Sootie]

Blahs are usual.....I know that doesn't make them any better. But knowing we have all been through them and that they DO go away should help. Just try to "get through". Maybe sleeping will help----whatever gets you through each day without smoking....do it (as long as it's legal!!!) Know that it is doable!

Stay Strong.

[missellen]

Hi Danielle.  I'm in my second week now, too, and I also am having some digestive issues and a definite case of the "blahs".  The fact that it is snowing AGAIN is not helping the blah factor over here.  I forced myself to the gym this morning and I actually jogged a few laps. I couldn't tell you the last time I jogged--decades ago, I'm sure. It gave me a boost. Of course now, I feel like just climbing into a pile of blankets and going to sleep, but they'd probably frown on that here at work. 

You're doing great!    Hang in there!

-Ellen

[DLHaffner]

I laughed out loud at that one Miss Ellen!   Good one!  I'm going to try to hit the gym tonight I just can't do the morning.  I want to.  We'll see.  I would also like to climb into some blankets and nap but would definitely get some weird looks here at work.   I guess we'll both have to live vicariously through George Costanza (Sienfield).    I feel less down and blah today, I hope you have a beautiful day even though it's snowing.   Thank you!  Danielle