Well, I am starting to feel less self-congratulatory and more uncertain and miserable. I had dinner with my editor last night and after congratulating me on quitting (I had to tell him why I wasn't having a glass of wine) he went on to say SEVERAL TIMES that I was more fun when I was smoking and drinking and that he wished I was still smoking but congratulations that I had quit. Um, not exactly support. I left the high-stressed fast-paced, lasted for 2.5 hours dinner and wanted to smoke so, so, so bad. I even asked my husband for a cigarette but he wouldn't give one to me, and I got mad at him and went to bed in a huff, which was as unfair and unkind of me as it was fair and kind of him.
And then today was also hard. I came home and snacked on a ton of random stuff just because I didn't know what else to do. I feel discouraged. How am I going to do this, day after day after day, and am I going to gain a ton of weight?
An embarrassing blog post, but the truth...
I need to find new motivation!
