When I woke up this morning I wanted to smoke SO BAD. I was surpised, because I had made it past the 3 day mark and I wasn't expecting this feeling to get stronger. But I knew it wasn't really a physical craving. I've gone from between 8 - 12 cigarettes a day (containing approx. AT LEAST 64 mg of nicotine per day) down to 4 -5 peices of nicotine gum a day (2 mg. nicotine each - for a total of a maximum of 10 mg of nicotine a day) So my craving was purely mental. I wanted the comfort of smoking... the feeling of smoking... the routine and repetition of it. But as surpised as I was by this desire, I still felt strong in my decision to quit. I went through the routines of my day. Around lunch time I started feeling bad - achy and weak... but I realized I hadn't been drinking enough water. I drank more water and took a hot bath to de-stress and relax my tense muscles.
Later in the day, something amazing happened! My husband came home from work. We used to smoke together after he got home, out on the front porch, talking about our day. I've been staying inside while he goes out to smoke, keeping myself separate from the smell and the temptation. So he was out there smoking today and I thought of something I wanted to tell him. I walked out to the porch to join him... sat next to him and started talking to him... just like usual. It wasn't until he got up to put out his cigarette that I realized... I had just sat next to him while he was smoking and I hadn't ONCE thought about his cigarette. I hadn't thought of it when I walked out the door to join him. I hadn't longed for one when I smelled his cigarette... IT HADN'T EVEN CROSSED MY MIND.
Also, tonight my best friend came over for several hours and had dinner with us. She smokes but she is VERY supportive of me quitting. We used to be "smoking buddies", and I always smoked more when I was around her. But tonite, twice she discreetly excused herself to go smoke, and I didn't go with her. I stayed inside and continued cooking dinner. I thought; you know- when I hang out with non-smokers, they don't come outside with me when I go smoke. So this is how it works. Just because a freind smokes, doesn't mean I have to go with them. It is THEY who choose to separate themselves from everyone else when they go smoke... I don't have to be "nice" or "friendly" and go with them... it's not what Non-Smokers do.
So all in all, I'm feeling incredibly strongand happy. Sure, I'm tired. Sure, I'm still having to battle with the desire to smoke. But it's nothing I can't handle and it gets easier every day!
My desktop quit keeper says; I have been quit for 3 Days, 22 hours, 58 minutes and 5 seconds (3 days). I have saved $13.05 by not smoking 47 cigarettes. I have saved 3 hours and 55 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 11/14/2010 11:06 PM
Also, I know not everyone here is into this, but I do Tarot Card readings. I think the Tarot can be a great tool for self-discovery and empowerment. Anyways, today I gave myself a tarot reading about overcoming addiction. It was very insightful and helpful to me... if you would like to read itI posted it here at my blog;
http://tarotmom.blogspot.com/2010/11/quitting-smoking-my-tarot-reading.html
