Today is day 19 of being smoke free! I just realized that I will be celebrating Day 20 with my first 5k race! That's cool.
Last night I had another very vivid dream that I smoked. And it didn't end with smoking, it ended with quite a good deal of worry and guilt. I can't remember where I was or what I was doing, I mostly just remember feeling horrible about myself for giving in to a cigarette. And I woke up feeling like that too, until the logical part of my brain said, there's no way you could have been out somewhere smoking. You've been in bed asleep.
Whew! I choose to take these dreams (this is probably the 3rd or 4th) not as a symbol of my continued desire to smoke but as a warning of how strong my feelings of guilt and regret would be if I did smoke. Good timing too because I am driving to my friend's house tonight and we always smoked together.
Have a great weekend!
