Well, I woke up this morning with a headache because I didn't sleep very well last night. I don't normally sleep very well because of the panic attacks but I also don't normally wake up with a headache either. I'm a bit crabby but determined to stick to my weaning.
I haven't yet decided on a quit date. I was actually a little stressed about that yesterday. I decided that I'm going to discuss it in my cessation support group tomorrow morning and will hopefully walk out with a clear head and a solid quit date. I'm very determined to quit.
I'm getting sick and tired of going outside every time Chris lights up. Its a temptation that I don't want and don't need not to mention that I can't stand the smell when he lights his smokes. I wish that he would be a bit more supportive and either go outside to smoke, open a freakin' window or just do it in another room.
I have appointments this morning and I need to help a friend. Today I have my mindfulness group. I really look forward to this one because it really is helping me stay grounded in the present moment much better than I've ever been able to. There is always great information and exercises that help me to not look forward and not look back but just try to stay in the present moment allowing myself to feel what I feel and know that its okay. The most amazing thing happened last week during this group. I learned that when I say "I'm having a craving." or "I'm having a panic attack." That the craving and the panic get worse. When I replace those thoughts with "There is a craving." or "There is panic present.", things get better almost immediately. Just by removing the "me" or "I" creates a detachment and sort of renders the feeling powerless. Absolutely amazing to me! I can't wait to see what happens today.
