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Another Day

nothinbutathing
0 2 36

Well another day is in front of me/us. Cant help but wonder how the ole will power will hold out today. For instance how can I get these issues out of my damn head.

I am starting to truly fear like a lot of others on here that a weight gain could be an issue for me. I always thought in the back of my head that I would rather risk all the health issues from smoking than all the health issues of being obese. And we all know there is a long list for both. But at least they can take me in and out of the house to get me to a hospital when I need to go (which is a good thing in my mind). I am sure most of us have seen these men,woman, or children that they have on some of the A&E or whatever network puts them on. They show the issue they have when they have to go to the hospital they have to remove walls,doors,windows, Need I say more. But then I have neighbors they are older (60 or so) the woman walks around (when she is able to come off the breathing machine in the house) with tanks that she carries to walk around the yard with her 2 black poodles and get that smoke on (which might last 4 to 6 minutes and skinny as a rail). I have always had 2 major fears in my life 1. Losing my mind (domincia,alzheimers,any type of nerueo type issue) and #2 is not being able to take a breath when you want to breathe. Such a normal and yet a nescessary part of the body's reaction. And strugling to get that breath and not able to would be like living a nightmare to me. And I truly do not mean to offend anyone with infuzema or anyone you know with it as well. This is just me and how I would feel. Kind of my Serpant and the Rainbow issue and feel to it.

So gain 200lbs and be miserable or smoke like a chimney and be miserable. Is the question (who has got the answer). I believe the last time I quit I gained about 35lbs or so in like 7 weeks. Keep that up for as long as I want to quit for and that would be a pretty large # in weight gain I am thinking. Hell I was miserable with the little weight gain I had.

So another day in the struggle of the quit. You would think these #'s would give you some type of solise. But honestly I am scared these #'s just get blurred by the reality of the addiction.

I have been quit for 1 Week, 6 Days, 14 hours, 45 minutes and 24 seconds (13 days). I have saved $113.16 by not smoking 476 cigarettes. I have saved 1 Day, 15 hours and 40 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 1/9/2010 9:00 PM

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