An Articulate Group of Successful Quitters

[67oldbabe]

I am currently approaching the The 48th hour of living without cigarettes.

I have read many of the “quit” posts out there and remarkably they are all very well written.

I wonder if the posts are written by real people or just computer generated based on subject.

i find the whole “quit” process quite bizarre - all the comments - especially the “support” comments very StepfordWiveish! 

Would like to know if anyone shares these thoughts? By the way I have smoked for 45 years and just stopped - no aids.

[indingrl]

Cool

[MarilynH]

[Sootie]

And we surely know how to DISAGREE don't we gang??? 67oldbabe‌ If you keep reading our old blogs I'm sure you will come upon one of our "disagreement" sessions which can be very "un-Stepford Wife" like.

[Sootie]

I've had both----dogs are easier.

[67oldbabe]

Looking forward to it - will live in the archives!

Sent from my iPhone

[67oldbabe]

Life is very good - gym 4 days a week - boot camp, TRX, weights and golf 3 days a week

Sent from my iPhone

[YoungAtHeart]

Actually, you will find that a good many of us are VERY active.  It seems to me that when folks quit smoking, they start to work more on their overall health, too.  We start healthier diets, and do increase our exercise.  I have always walked a minimum of 30 - 50 minutes a day and, in the summer, swim 30-45 minute of laps most every day.   We have folks training for various length marathons and triathlons, working on increasing their Fitbit steps to 10,000, hitting the gym, etc. 

Get to know us better; I think you will find you have a lot in common with us!

[67oldbabe]

Hopefully most people are active - I have always been active - my routine did not change just because I quit smoking.

I am hoping ( like everyone) to live a sickness free life. I will continue to stay smoke free and to seek guidance and personal strength from the experiences of people participating in this forum.

Sent from my iPhone

[indingrl]

Wow! YOU go Nancy

[indingrl]

WOW!  YOU go 67oldbabe

[Barbscloud]

Actually many people on this site were very active in spite of smoking and may have even thought it helped negate the effects of smoking.   I'm doing the same activities now that I did when I was smoking.

[Barbscloud]

That's the first time I've ever heard anyone say dogs are easier.  I've always had both also.

Barb

[67oldbabe]

That’s good

Sent from my iPhone

[GyorgyiM]

Welcome, 67oldbabe...

Entitled?....................Hummmmm? .........................Yes, I suppose you are......as we are.....

But tread lightly.....

It's like going into a "soup kitchen"....ALL is welcome....but respect is a must,

that is, if you want to use a utensil.

Welcome.....

Gyorgyi 

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Hey Gyorgyi, I hope all is well with you.

 

[JACKIE1-25-15]

On January 28th, 2019  I saved this image in my draft file to write a blog. Thanks to 67oldbabe I can post MY image of EX and not have to write the blog. To get a better picture of the EX Community here is a blog by "Our Lady E"  elvan one of our loved elders at her best‌ https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2014/04/27/our-crazy-quilt quilt. featured in the Best of EX ‌a great place to read blogs. 

elvan

Welcome to EX, No robots here

and I am sorry if I sounded like one. I am not that "articulate". lol, but others spoke in love for me. you have come to the right place for support.  That may sound robotic but it is the truth. 

  

[67oldbabe]

Ok so maybe you don’t want me - ok. I won’t enter. Obviously stating an opinion is not appreciated. Thanks.

Sent from my iPhone

[Barbscloud]

My goodness   How are you?   It's good to hear from you.

Barb

[GyorgyiM]

That's slightly passive aggressive...........We "ALL" want you.......that's the point.

[YoungAtHeart]

An opinion is totally acceptable.  A generalized judgment and criticism  of people you have not made any effort to
"know" is not.

I think smoking is dangerous - period.  I think vaping is not a good alternative - period.  That is my opinion.

People who smoke or vape are stupid and uninformed - is a judgment and criticism.

See the difference?

[GyorgyiM]

Great! Thank you, but we wont do this on "oldbabes" dime....Thanks for asking.

[67oldbabe]

Ok I’m out

Sent from my iPhone

[Barbscloud]

A lot of time has been wasted on this (60 some comments).   This is just me, but my time is better spent helping "real" members with their quits.  I think everyone has tried to be helpful and polite, but this is absurd now.  They're are many strong, opinionated members on this site, but this has gone to a different level.  I'm starting to wonder if this is a scam.    (I couldn't resist responding to GyorgyiM )

Barb

[djmurray]

Well, OldBabe, you really got everyone's attention.  I'm pleased to know you have read tons of blogs on this site, and not surprised that you noticed some common themes.  We really care about each other.  This community is as welcoming a group as I've ever encountered.  I've been here for almost five years and while some people come and go, there's a gravitas to what we do here that is quite powerful.  I know that what I accomplished by quitting smoking after 53 years and almost a million cigarettes absolutely changed my life.  Yes.  I denied having COPD for 2 years before I quit (talk about stupid).  After 4 1/2 years of not smoking I'm actually breathing better and hardly ever need oxygen now.  I'm retired and living on a fixed income (at least until I find a job) and I am not spending $6 a pack (and that's in Richmond, Virginia -- I can't imagine what they cost in New York or Los Angeles or Miami) to satisfy the craving I created when I smoked the last one.  And I am no longer hiding behind the smoke screen.  Believe it or not, like any addiction, smoking gave us a way to NOT deal with emotions we didn't want to handle.  Part of adjusting to being a nonsmoker involves dealing with those emotions, which is daunting but rewarding.  

As others have said, we don't all agree on pretty much anything except that smoking (and vaping) is bad for us.  But because people's lives are literally changed by making and keeping the commitment to quit, we come back and welcome those who want to join us.  Congratulations on 3 days!

[marciem]

Way back first day I tried to give you credit for "new quitness" irritability/ testiness for your VERY rude remarks (belieing your very nice thread title about how articulate you found this board, which is what attracted me in the first place).  My thought was that you were either a. testy or b. just naturally rude, so I gave benefit of the doubt. You slapped me down with a "Not testy" so obviously it was choice B. in my book.  I've refrained from responding until now.

If you have been grooming us for a "boo hoo, ya'll are so mean, I'm leaving" (seen it a hundred times in 100 forms) then.... fare the well.  Somewhere else.  You've gotten more positive reinforcement and warm fuzzies than deserved (IMO)

I wish you well, if your intention is truly to quit and maintain a quit.   I hope you will stay and learn and find a way to be comfortable in this community.  It is very welcoming to those who don't spit at them.   YoungAtHeart gave a great example of the difference between being rude and expressing an opinion.   You might try it  . 

When you see a person you find unattractive, do you say (just because you're entitled to express your opinion) "Hey you're really ugly" ... ?  Just wondering.  Some thoughts don't need to be expressed publicly.  \\Just my opinion\\

[JACKIE1-25-15]

I would not say "wasted". but time spent in part to a probable scam or someone trolling sites with the same message. I do not think this is 67oldbabe first rodeo.  I myself had to refrain from making snarky comments.  I don't want anyone that wants to quit smoking has an EXcuse to leave EX. There is much to gain if one is willing to receive.   I challenge those EXers that have been too busy, in the closet, to support before this blog would SPEND more time to help on other threads as well. The work here has become more challenging with vaping, depression, anxiety, medical issues, and family problems on the rise..  We need more support instead of the same ones. Maybe we won't sound so robotic. There are two sides to every coin. This one pulled inactive  EXers out of the closet. though I am glad to see them, it wasn't "wasted time".  Focus People

[Kimchristensen1]

I think those of us in the community realize how addictive nicotine is and want to support each other in breaking the addiction. I applaud your choice of quitting cold turkey,  I am doing Chantix and nicotine gum. I don’t have the control to quit cold turkey 

fight the good fight,

k

[indingrl]

[indingrl]

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Thanks for all that you do here to support the community is so many ways.  You are a light that shines bright.  I see you. 

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Samanthaeve‌ I read your comment before you deleted it and was going to respond.

 Hi. congratulations on your decision to quit smoking. It takes commitment and willingness to do whatever is necessary Not to smoke. No matter what.  I am glad you are still here.  I just have a few questions in response to your comment. Did your counselors want to quit smoking?  They may be educated in one aspect and not another.  Did you read Allen Carrs Book? There is no magic cure, pill or book. These are aides/tools that have worked for many.but maybe, not for you. Everything is a choice. We are not EXperts only EX-smokers sharing our EXperience of quitting and offering support. There is a saying around here sometimes I like it and sometimes I don't but take what you can use and discard the rest.  It takes commitment and willingness to do whatever is necessary Not to smoke. No matter what.  Never give up. 

[MarilynH]

I also read it and was pondering on what to say if I were to comment thanks Jackie....

[virgomama]

I don't consider any folks here very sedentary.  I certainly am not, but I found the to do list incredibly helpful inspite of my activeness.   Good luck on your quit.  

[Samanthaeve]

HI! Yep. Deleted it. After I posted it I scrolled back and saw waaaayyy toooo many folks had responded. I should of just osted two words: "OY VEY" and signed off.

In any case-in answer to your questions: EVERY ONE of my counselors are familiar with not only Alan Carrs book but various other educational materials regarding nicotine addiction.videos. Books. Scientific studies. Its not just the nicotine.. there are a zillion other chemicals in tobacco that make it even harder to quit. No one on the forum talks about these insidious chemicals.

All their (counselors) information and education has been shared with me. I also come from a family with a strong professional medical background and also a family that has been active in getting help/counseling for addicts of all kinds since the mid 1950s.

 I have mentioned in my blog post that I lost my mom to lung cancer when she was only 58. I smoked double the amount after losing her. I never left her side from the day of the diagnosis to the day she passed.

Its time for me to stop.I am in my mid 50s.

 I didnt want a painful quit so I am trying chantix this time.( I had a very unsuccessful attempt 2 years ago with Wellbutrin so weaned off.)

So far I am not doing too terrible.. from a pack a day to about 7 a day and I am on week 3. The whole "cold turkey" idea- not even an option for me.. I have seen junkies scratch their faces raw and I have seen alchoholics go through DTs.. Not into that warrior method.

Yet somehow I feel as if I am coming up empty when I read all these posts that are so militant- the NOPE/educate yourself/etc.I dont feel all "rah rah rah" about quitting.But I must. I am breaking up with a bad lover.... and I am slowly adopting the mindset of cigarettes not filling any void. I want to be able to "forget to smoke" - which is akin to forgetting to breathe for someone like me.Painfully aware there isnt a magic pill or book - but the chantix seems to give me muscle I didn't know I had.And thats at least something...

[JonesCarpeDiem]

I cut down from a pack to 5 a day over 4 weeks and I never counted or denied myself.

Whenever I wanted to smoke, I just said "I'm going to wait a little longer." No quit date, thus, no anxiety over quitting.

Friday of my 4th week I went to my store and when I put the money on the counter, I knew it was my last pack.

See, I had proven I didn't need to smoke just because I thought of smoking. I quit the following Tuesday. Bought the patches.

Forgot to wear one my 4th day. Made it through. When I forgot to wear it two days in a row the end of week 2, I put one in my wallet with the promise I would put it on rather than smoke. I never needed it. That was in January 2007. People overthink quitting and stress themselves out over it. You don't have to want to quit smoking. You do have to decide and be willing.

Willingness not willpower

[Samanthaeve]

this was one of the most helpful posts I have read !

 Thank You!!!!

[JonesCarpeDiem]

You're welcome. 

Once you actually quit you say "I don't do that anymore" when you think of smoking. This retrains your thinking in a weeks time.

If you need need real honest to goodness tips THAT WORK to beat the strongest of cravings, let me know.

[Sootie]

Although I LOVE my children to pieces---

My dogs are happy with an old soggy bone---never needed a new iphone, new Jordan sneakers, etc.

My dogs are happy to see me no matter what....if I take garbage out to the curb and come back...they jump all over as if they have missed me so much...they were going to die without me. My kids? hmmmm...not so much

If I am in a bad mood....my dogs sit waiting patiently for me until I have the time for them....and then, they are thrilled with any morsel of attention I give them. My kids? They don't really zoom in on my moods so much...it's all about theirs!!!

My dogs never break curfew, never date people who make me shake my head in wonder and they have never, never talked back to me.

Of course.....this is all in fun---I LOVE MY KIDS........

but oh! I do love my dogs!!!!!

[Sootie]

I really want to respond here but I am struggling with not wanting to be jumped on........

However, I am going to respond because if EX becomes a place where I have to edit my thoughts.....it won't be a place for me.

I have gone back and read her blog as well as all of our comments three times.......

Is it at all possible that we all got just a bit too defensive right at the get go of this blog? I mean---let's look at her side....she comes here and reads and..... in her opinion....the blogs seem too articulate and too much alike (I'm PRESUMING that was the Stepford comment). So, she blogs to clarify.....she asks, "are you real?"

What exactly was wrong with that? If you have gone on some other online sites......people do sometimes seem BARELY LITERATE. They don't edit their typing.....sometimes things are typed in upper and lower case and I mean like this-----

aNd i MEan liKe thiS.

Sometimes.....the spelling is so bad you simply cannot understand the thoughts.

I took it as quite a compliment that she found us, overall, very literate!

It's online and so I guess we could be robots. We're not. And we explained that.

She has an abrupt manner of blogging.....often just one line......I guess it seems off putting but that clearly is just her style. Some of her comments to Jackie were somewhat blunt......but of course...maybe she saw the question as blunt......"how did you find this site?" Maybe it sounded challenging and that is why she responded as she did.Who knows?

She took most of what we handed her and simply answered.

To Giulia she stated---Ok - did not mean to offend - just a comment

To Nancy---I will continue to stay smoke free and to seek guidance and personal strength from the experiences of people participating in this forum.

To Christine---Hey don’t be insulted. Am entitled to an opinion. Have read a lot of blogs and have found it all supportive.

Sorry but I am not finding the above anything to get ourselves into the lather we seem to be in. People should clarify if they were misunderstood.....right??  People are entitled to an opinion......correct?? And each time she compliments the site on the support (not to mention the well written blogs).

And if it is a scam (although I really don't see why we would think that of THIS person and not another) then it isn't our job to decide that...is it? Because how COULD we know? And we may deny support to someone who is.....dare I say it.....REAL......because we think it's a scam?

I have been accused many times on EX of ALWAYS taking the opposite opinion from the group. I don't TRY to do that (and I don't think I do!).....but in this case......I'm sorry but I have to.

And yes---I could remain silent. But if I do, then what...really....is the point?

JUST MY OPINION.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

This is why Ima Robutt. Help those you can, let the others play with themselves.

[anewdigger]

Wow - what you are doing IS very remarkable! Congratulations on 2 days nicotine free .. 

[Kimchristensen1]

Ok, what beats the strongest cravings?

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Bite into a lemon skin and all

Stick your head in the freezer and count backwards from 20.

Fill your mouth with ice cubes and try to not get brain freeze.

Shocking your senses overpowers the thought of smoking. 

(do it safely)

Shooting yourself out of a cannon is okay IF YOU HAVE A NET

Stand on one foot and wave both arms in a backward circle.

[Samanthaeve]

"willingness over willpower" helps.

what else ya got? Bless you a zillion times for taking an interest...

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Here's the whole enchilada.

/blogs/jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007-blog/2011/06/26/what-to-expect-in-the-first-four-months 

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2013/12/05/the-two-sets-of-seasons 

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Willpower is resistance to not smoking. (fighting yourself)

Willingness is accepting that you don't need to smoke. (Agreement with your decision to not smoke)

[Samanthaeve]

read them both just now. Bookmarked them both too...

[JonesCarpeDiem]

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/thread/6040-my-welcome-to-new-members-12-years-of-watching 

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Sorry for the loss of your mother. You are not the only one that has felt the way you are feeling about quitting smoking.  As far as the counselors go, how do they fit into your quit? A person can read all of the books they want but if they are not willing to take what they can use to quit no matter what it may not happen.  Just because someone is highly educated and are in the field of recovery does not mean that they "get it or even want to".  It is like the preacher preaching to the choir.  If you are smoking, how can you forget to smoke?  I used Welbutrin which helped me a lot. I still had to deal with a certain amount of withdrawal. Stick around and continue to have an open mind.  I am glad you are making progress. You will make it.  Rah rah-rah. 

[green1611]

no one real.... all robots. 

The Ex community were all robots earlier........

Steps

1) Signal received from brain...hippocampus / cortex

2) take out cigarette from pack

3) go out of room if required

4) take lighter (or matchbox) in one hand

5) ...so on so forth till the entire cigarette is smoked

Nicotine is absorbed in bloodstream and reaching rapidly in 8 to 10 seconds to brain... 

Aha Aha...

again after sometime Step 1) signal received from brain....

thanks for calling robot yourself till becoming Ex 

Doubting is negative emotion.

All the best