5 months today N.O.P.E.

[Gma_Bernie]

When I quit smoking on December 5th 2017 I didn't know if I was going to make it or not. But I have made it 5 months today! The road is still bumpy and I still want a cigarette. Sometimes it makes me crabby and angry and I Cry. But I am going through it. There's no other way. Just want to encourage anyone out there who's in the beginning days. Don't give up. Don't let anyone else influence whether you smoke or not. It is your life. And ultimately you are the one that is responsible for your health. Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone!

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Congratulations!

"There's no other way. "

Time is the healer.

Time distances you from it.

Time breaks the connections.

Onward and Upward

[YoungAtHeart]

This is just my opinion - but it seems to me if you are still angry that you might believe you have given something of value up.  The facts are otherwise!  All the things you believe you are missing are, in fact, lies.  Smoking does not ONE thing for you and a whole lot TO you.  It doesn't help you relax or think (it just stops the brain receptor from jonesing for a fix and you thus FEEL calmer), it's not your friend - would a friend deceive you with drugs to disguise the fact they are slowly and surely killing you -  it steals your money, your time, and your ability to go places and do things that no longer allow smoking.

Perhaps you want to continue to hide from your feelings?  You can do the same in healthier ways.  Take a yoga class, call a friend, watch funny videos on YouTube, do any kind of brisk exercise.  If you are depressed or suffer from anxiety, talk to your doctor.

Don't regret quitting smoking.  It is saving your quality of life!

Let me know if I can help - I want you to enjoy this freedom you have worked so hard to achieve!

Nancy.

[Gma_Bernie]

Thanks Dale.

[Gma_Bernie]

Nancy, this is my quit. The fact that I am still angry and want a cigarette is regretful I know, but it's the way I feel, and denying it is going to do no good.

I do go to yoga every week at the Y and I have a physical therapist who is giving me exercises for my pain, I walk everyday so, I knit, I read books, I watch Netflix, so please don't assume that I am not working on getting better. I just have to do it in my own way. Because I miss cigarettes, does not mean that I would smoke one if I had a chance. I could have done it any time and chose not to. I really don't want a cigarette, but my brain thinks I do. I cannot help the way I feel about it. And if I thought that this feeling would never go away, I would just give up now. But I am confident that it will go away. And that someday the thought of a cigarette will literally make me sick. But for now I am still irritated. And part of that is because when you smoke you isolate yourself necessarily because you are ashamed of your behavior. Or at least I was. Part of the rehab is getting used to interacting with other people without the cigarettes. I seem to be a little short of friends at the moment. One of my dear friends just died, I went to the funeral on Wednesday. She was my age. She did not smoke. It was something totally unrelated. She did not deserve to die. I, on the other hand, have not taken care of myself over the years, and it caused me some pain and sorrow that someone so positive and cheerful and healthy should go before me.

Thanks for the offer of help.

Bernie

[Jennifer-Quit]

Congratulations on 5 months!

[Gma_Bernie]

Yay! Thank you.

On Sat, May 5, 2018 at 8:45 AM, Jennifer-Quit-05-01-14 <

[MarilynH]

First of all I want to congratulate you on your precious 5 glorious months of Smokefree living and counting WTG, it really does get easier and easier with time under your belt and one of these days sooner than later hopefully you won't even think about a smoke let alone want one BUT you are doing great by stacking your precious DOF,I'm very sorry about the passing of your friend Bernie life just isn't fair sometimes BUT we get through the hurt and the anguish each day and I am proud of you for protecting your quit, yay for each and every Day WON......

[Gma_Bernie]

Thanks, Marilyn

On Sat, May 5, 2018 at 8:51 AM, Marilyn.H.July.14.14. <

[desiree465]

Well said and congratulations to you on 5 months of freedom you're an inspiration. 

[Barbscloud]

Congratulations on 5 months.  That's wonderful.  At 53 days, not so much angry, but still sad at times.  Hopefully, this to will pass.  Sorry about the loss of your friend.  Life just isn't fair even though we continue to think is should be.

Barb

[Bonnie]

Thank you for your honesty and for staying the course even when it's difficult.  I am sorry for the loss of your friend.  I realize smoking was one way I coped with loss--now I have to feel the pain.  Thank you for sharing how you feel--I woke up a bit sad and cranky this morning and I really have no reason to be.  Your post made me realize I'm not alone.  

[Gma_Bernie]

Thanks, Desiree

<https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/people/desiree465?et=blogs.comment.created>

On Sat, May 5, 2018 at 9:20 AM, desiree465 <communityadmin@becomeanex.org>

[Gma_Bernie]

Thanks, Barb

On Sat, May 5, 2018 at 9:24 AM, Barbscloud <communityadmin@becomeanex.org>

[Gma_Bernie]

Thanks, Bonnie

[Giulia]

I said for the longest time "if I could smoke without penalty, I would."  Because I learned the penalty is great, I didn't give up my quit.  But I understand what you're experiencing.  It takes quite a while for some of us to "get over it" mentally.  But we do eventually.  So you just keep hanging in there.  You have taken responsibility for you life.  Not many have been able to achieve that.  Kudos on the 5 months.

[freeneasy]

It seems like some miss smoking more than others. It' been 5 years and 4 months since I quit and I still think about it once in a while. You're doing great. I think when I reached 5 months I was confident I could keep my quit. I appreciate all the benefits of being an ex-smoker every day- the freedom, health, financial, etc. It gets better. Keep coming here. .Remembering N.O.P.E., N.E.F., and S.I.N.A.O. and " I'd rather be an ex-smoker who wants to smoke once in a while than a smoker who always wants to quit" keeps it in perspective.

[Christine13]

Many Congratulations on your 5 months smoke free!!  You are doing all the work.  I think it's normal to still miss it.

I am just starting in my journey and only once did I make it to a year.  Kudos to you for being upfront and honest with where you are today!!  CELEBRATE!!!!

[KTQeeyore]

Congratulations on 5 months smoke free bsheats! Good for you!   

[Gma_Bernie]

Thank you, Giulia

[Bonnie]

You are so right!!!!!  I won't forget "I would rather be an ex-smoker who want to smoke once in awhile than a smoker who always wants to quit".  THANK YOU!!!!

[elvan]

FIVE MONTHS is HUGE, I am so proud of you and so happy for you, what a great journey you are on!  

XOXO,

Ellen

[Gma_Bernie]

Thanks Ellen. All the trouble you have been going through, you are a tough lady. I think you and I are alike in that way. But please do take care of yourself. You are such a precious resource on this site to so many. I value you and I honor you for your honesty and your willingness to share. Please keep us informed on your progress. And take all the time you need to recover. We need you in good shape!

Bernie

[Gma_Bernie]

Christine, Bonnie, freeneasy and KT, thanks all of you for your encouragement. I need all of you and hope I can be there for you too.