DJ Murray (Donna)

[djmurray]

As John suggested, I am going to use this topic to "tell my story" and keep it up.  Feel free to comment.  Or not.

I do have to say that I had just written a really long blog (taking time periodically to check my work email since I'm working at home today) and when I went to post it I got an error message that I had timed out, and everything I wrote disappeared!  OH NO.  Here goes again.  I will make sure to copy what I write so I can paste it if the site times out.  For anyone who wants to write a long blog, take my advice -- copy it before you go to post it so that you don't lose what you've written.

I am struck by how similar my feelings about this diet are to the feelings I experienced in the early days of my quit.  I am proud of myself for recognizing that I can improve my breathing by losing this weight.  I'm proud of myself for wanting to make it easier for my lungs to work.  I was surprised after my quit that I was having so much trouble breathing, and thought I must have pretty serious COPD.  I went to the pulmonologist on February 9th and got the great news that I have really good lung function, at 90%+.  So that isn't the reason that I'm having trouble breathing.  I didn't have to get hit in the head to realize that my lungs are probably deeply grateful for no more smoking, but are still having trouble servicing this 210 pound, out of shape, 66 year old body.

I spent the next several weeks researching the types of weight loss I could commit to.  I looked at Beyond Diet, which I am sure is very healthy, but requires shopping at specialty stores and cooking.  I am not a cook.  Seriously.  My kids thought that a home cooked meal was fish sticks and macaroni and cheese out of a box.  So although the principles of Beyond Diet will come in handy when I'm back to regular eating (eat very little processed food, read every label, eat organic vegetables, etc), but not for the disciplined following of a program for weight loss.  I also looked at Weight Watchers, but I'm -- again -- not so disciplined to count those points, or calories, or whatever.  I did the Medifast program very successfully in 1987, and I like the idea of having my meals close at hand and that they are easily transportable.  The 1 "lean and green" meal I prepare for myself is a small serving of lean meat and a choice of vegetables.  Easy.  I don’t intend to do my entire 60 pound weight loss on this diet, but after about 3 months or so I will have lost a good part of it, my craves for carbs and fats will be gone, and portion control won’t be a problem.  I think that works out best all around.

This is the first time I have ever tried to lose weight not because I want to be a size 4, but because it will make me healthier.  In addition to the problems I've been having with breathing, my joints are giving me real problems – they’re stiff and painful, and not appropriate for someone my age who is in good health.  In order for my joints to get relief, I need to move more.  I never moved because I was smoking (sitting somewhere saying "yeah, I'll do (Fill in the Blank) after I smoke this cigarette."  In addition, my breathing deteriorated so I moved even less.  I’ve always hated exercise (yes, I’ve joined gyms and never gone) and I have a very sedentary job.  So I pretty much came to a standstill.  No wonder my joints hurt!!

I have always struggled with my weight.  In the summer between 6^th and 7^th grade I weighed 129 pounds.  In my adult life I’ve been everything from a size 4 to a size 20.  In my late 50’s I decided I was done with dieting.  I was fine the way I was.  My weight stabilized at about 190 (size 16) and I was fine with that.  So for nine years I ate pretty much what I wanted, stayed the same weight, and didn’t have a problem.  At the age of 66 I’m not terribly vain, and I felt fine about my weight.  But this isn’t a question of vanity – it’s a question of health.  And the older I get the more I understand the value of maintaining good health (I’m a slow learner.)

Getting back to how starting this diet is like my early days in my quit – I am also feeling cravings, and I know that they are just feelings that will pass.  I realize that gluttony is a poor reward for anything (and eating two Heath Bar Klondikes at a sitting is gluttony, pure and simple).  So I am quitting cold turkey.  I find myself second guessing myself – “Do I really need to do this?”  “This is hard on top of my quit.”  “Don’t I deserve to enjoy SOMETHING?”  But that is just the self-degrading self-talk that some of us have had to deal with in our lives.  Am I starving?  No.  Are these hunger pangs going to kill me?  No.  Is it hard?  Sometimes.  Learning to laugh at my smoking addict’s brain is helping me deal with these doubts.  I know I can do this as well as quitting smoking.  I know that in 6 months I am going to be enjoying this summer as a smoke free much healthier person.

So this is my story.  Thanks for listening!

[bonnie-12-28-14]

OK Donna so I knew yours was on page 2 but I did not know mine was so I missed your posts:):).   I get up at 3:00 every day I start work right now with so much overtime at 5:30 and even though I dont take that long to get ready I have to have some get up and get coffee time.  

With good weather it takes 45 minutes that early in the AM to get to work but at least an hour to get home even leaving between 3:00 and 3:30.  

That's what I meant by saying you were the night owl and I am the early bird.  I haven't stayed up till 11:00 in I don't know how long.  But most weekends I still get up between 3:30 and 4:00.

Have a great one!!!!

[ShawnP]

Stopping in to visit you Donna. Sounds like you have some great choices of food to eat here. I can't say that i have tried tilapia. Really i am not much of a fish or seafood eater. My idea of fish is from mcdonalds or arbys where it is breaded and i dont have to see anything LOL.  I do eat tuna but i have to mix it with mayo.  When you said that you have your weigh in tomorrow, do you weigh in at a certain place or just in the comfort of your home? I have an official weigh out in 2 weeks. I joined dietbet through fb. i bet that i will lose 4% of my weight. If I make it, we split the pot with whoever else wins. I have won a few but the last few months i have lost. One of the reasons why i wanted to switch plans. This one only costs 10.00 a month and this particular group is all fitbit users. we do challenges. This weekend they challenged us to 3 hrs of activity. For the month that we are on this bet, we also are to try to do 100,000 steps for the month. It is motivating. Am wondering about Nashville, do i eat normal that weekend or watch everything that i eat. I am still debating that. Hope that shot helped you the other day. Have a great night.

[djmurray]

Well, I had my weigh in this morning and I'm at 202.4.  So here are the stats:

Starting weight 3/1/2015          210.7

Weight at 1 week:                      202.2 -- down 8.5

Weight at 2 weeks:                    204.4 -- up 2.2 

Weight at 3 weeks:                    202.4 -- down 2.0

So my cumulative weight loss in 22 days is 8.3.  Not really impressive, but I'm a grownup, and I recognize that there is a part of me that wants instant results, and I know that I won't get instant results.  So I will remain steady on, and if I continue to eat the way I've been eating, I have to lose.  It's a good thing I'm feeling so good about my smoking quit, because this is way harder to stay positive about. 

[bonnie-12-28-14]

Your right it is a lot harder due to smoking you either smoke or you don't.  Eating is not the same you have to eat.  Your doing great Donna.  I hope you have a wonderful Sunday.  

[John10forteen]

Because you quit smoking and felt so good about it, you tried to get healthier and lose some weight. You're now a non smoker thats 8 lbs lighter than three weeks ago. I'm not seeing a down side here. 

And in another 3 weeks if you only lose 1 more lb...... still no downside. it's a good trend.

Just saying you're doing great, Take the wins when they come. 

[John10forteen]

Is there an irony here that we think maybe quitting smoking was easier than doing this. N.E.F. being a smoker. it was one of the hardest things in the world to do, to stop.

Adjusting our diets and activity should be a journey of joy and adventure that we are planning to participate with for a lifetime. Being conscious, aware and actively in pursuit of a healtier stature will ensure weight loss over time.

Gotta go, I just burnt my rice.  (Somethings smoking and it's not me!)

[ShawnP]

This is what i think....you lost alot of weight that first week and i can guarantee most of it was a water loss. Now you are evening out. You are doing great! They say a healthy loss is 1-2 lb a week so you are right on track to a healthier you! Smile!!! We all want to see instant results but its easier to put on lbs than to lose them. I believe its easier to quit smoking than to lose weight. Like Bonnie said, we have to eat. I do know its harder to stay positive about this cause we get easily discouraged especially when we have been obeying. You had a good week and the hard work paid off. Keep moving forward!

[djmurray]

Thanks for all the support, my friends.  I blogged a few minutes ago about the fact that trying to educate myself about this whole nutrition thing is massively confusing.  There are as many opinions out there as there are ways to think about eating.  I investigated the Crystal Light I've been drinking for years, and the artificial sweeteners and other chemicals in it have made me decide to switch to just water.  I have never liked just water (hence the Crystal Light) but I do sip constantly, so I'll just have to get used to it. 

I ABSOLUTELY think that quitting smoking is not as hard as this.  Every single moment I do not smoke I get a reward!   This does NOT feel rewarding!!

[ShawnP]

I know you said you get migraines. Not sure what causes yours but i do know the artificial sweeteners, especially aspartame can cause migraines. This is one of the reasons why i never drank anything diet. You could make your own water and its healthy. I always wanted to try this.

http://www.theyummylife.com/Flavored_Water

You are getting rewarded Donna. look at it this way...you have lost 2 bags of sugar (4lb bag). If you have that in the house lift it up to see or when you are shopping next, lift 2 bags. There is your reality of what you have lost. 

[John10forteen]

Maybe it doesn't feel rewarding YET. and that's not FAIR! You're right this will take longer but you'll get it.